A Wedding
by Tlong
Summary: Mousse has gone back home... But with the providence under siege, that means that a rescue party is needed. Chapter 10 had editing problems my latex to html program missed, I fixed it.
1. Chapter 1

This is a story I previously put on here a while back. I've been doing grad school for a while and havent has the time to work on it in a while, but hopefully things will change this semester after I take prelims... In the meantime I've been re-writing and working on the formating and spelling. I hope you enjoy.

TL

* * *

Ramna ½: A Wedding TLLong

Disclaimer: I don't own it. It ain't mine. Don't sue me, I already owe to much money as it is.

Chapter 1

"But in your dreams whatever they be,  
Dream a little dream of me."  
-Dream a Little Dream, Louis Armstrong and Ella Fitzgerald

Ranma awoke with a start; arms and legs flailing wildly, they instinctively reached out for something solid to hold on to. His hands found the blanket, as he sat up, It's real, he thought. Ranma drew in a deep breath.

"It was a dream," his shoulders rolled forward as his head slumped between his knees, "Just a dream." But what dream? Ranma desperately tried to hold on to it, grasp a mental picture in his head that would anchor the dream in his mind. Yet the harder he tried to remember it the faster it seemed to slip away.

"Happen again?" His father hunched down as he rolled up his sleeping mat, to put it away for the day. "You know that's the third time this week."

"Yeah, I know," Ranma said, as he looked down at his hands. He was griping the covers so tight that his knuckles were white.

"Still can't remember it?"

"No, Pop, I can't. It goes away as soon as I wake up."

"Ranma, I can not allow this to continue," Genma said, stepping on his son's neck, and forcing his head back down into the futon. "A true martial artist faces his fears. I order you to go to the dojo and meditate on your dreams until you can figure out what has gotten you so terrified. It pains me to know that I have such a coward for a son..."

A sudden splash of water from the pail that Ranma kept at his bedside just for such tirades initiated a premature finish to Genma's speech. "For someone who won't go home because he's afraid of mom, you ain't got much room to speak, pop," Ranma bit as he stood up to walk out of the room, flipping his father onto his back in the process.

He had to leave, and soon, before he lost his temper. He lost it for the first time, in his battle with Saffron. That is truly lost it. So angry that he still could not remember the details of the fight; and the result terrified him. There was no way he would place himself in anything remotely akin to that situation again.

The panda behind him cringed, cuddled his favorite ball and held up a sign. That's not fair! Your dreams don't have sharp pointy swords!

"Whatever," Ranma said as he closed the door.

* * *

Akane lounged at the table with her father and sisters, as the three sat down for breakfast. She sat quietly, not really eating but rather pushing her rice around her bowl. Her mind had been reeling since their return from China, full of questions, thoughts, but more importantly, feelings that were floating around her head in a jumble, trying to form thoughts and sentences. It did not help that Ranma had been avoiding her of late. Akane didn't know why but over the course of the past few days he had not said more than a handful of words to her. The resulting silence had finally permeated the rest of the household, as the other Tendo's sat and quietly ate, except for Nabiki, who with pen and paper was diligently pouring over the family's expenses. Soun read his paper while he ate, wanting to break the silence, but not sure exactly how, being the only male in a family of females 

"Nabiki," Kasumi said, "Have you decided where you will be attending school next year?"

Nabiki looked up from her accounts and figures, "Not yet, both Kyoto and Tokyo have great programs, but my third choice has offered more scholarships than those two."

"Oh," Soun said, looking up at her from the top of his folded down paper. What school could possibly compete with Kyoto and Tokyo? Things might have changed a bit, but weren't those the two best schools in the nation? "And what school might this be Nabiki?"

"Harvard," Nabiki scribbled another figure in her ledger, "They are offering me 780,000 more yen a semester to attend there."

"Harvard," Soun said, slamming his paper into the table, "But isn't that in the States?"

"Gee," Nabiki lifted her eyes off of the ledger for a moment, "and all this time I though it was in Okinawa, Silly me."

"Goodness," Kasumi said, covering her mouth with her hand, "why would you want to go so far away?"

"Because, it has the best School of Business," Nabiki scribbled another figure into her ledger.

"But won't you loose all of your connections here in Japan?" Kasumi asked as she poured her father a cup of coffee.

Nabiki cocked her head to the side for a moment. In Japanese business, one's personal connections were infinitely more important than any other resource one might possess. Losing those connections while studying abroad might seriously handicap her future. "I've thought about that, but there is also a good possibility that I could get a job with an American firm trying to break in to the Japanese market. And in an American firm I would be advanced based on my merits, not by my hire date. So even though going to a Japanese school would be more stable, Harvard might have a greater payoff."

"My Nabiki is going to go away to the States," Tears poured out of Soun's eyes, "and Akane's getting married. Soon I'll be old and alone in this big house by myself."

Nabiki rolled her eyes, "I never said I was going for sure, I just said that it was an option."

Kasumi coughed, it was time to change the subject. "Akane, how is Ranma? He looks like he hasn't slept very well over the past few days."

Kasumi's question was followed by the sudden snap of Akane's chopsticks breaking. "I don't know," she said, as she sprang to her feet, "the jerk won't talk to me anymore. As far as I'm concerned, he can just go rot. It's not like I give a damn about that Pervert anyway."

Akane whirled around to stop out of the room, only to find Ranma standing in the doorway, a pained look upon his face. "Ranma, I'm..." she said, suddenly unable to meet his gaze. Ranma didn't say a word; instead he stepped past her and out the door to the back yard.

He didn't even call me an un-cute tomboy, Akane thought as a worried look crept up on her face.

"No," Nabiki said her pencil scribbling in a fluid motion, "it's not like you care at all."

* * *

A single bead of sweat rolled towards the tip of Ranma's nose as he rebounded off the north wall from a spinning crescent and landed in a crouch in the center of the dojo. Drawing in several ragged breaths he watched as the drop fell to the floor. Akane was right, Ranma thought back to all the times she had asked him to spar with her. 

"Damn it Ranma, hold still!" she had said, throwing punches at him wildly as he flipped about her, "How am I supposed to relieve stress when you won't even fight me?"

A slight smile creped into his cheeks, This does relieve stress. Sweat seeped out of Ranma's skin, cleansed the impurities from his soul, as his anger, self doubt, hurt and sadness washed through his pores, leaving his mussels limp and tired.

I'm ready, he thought as he rocked back onto the floor, crossing his legs in front of him, now let's see if I can work this dream business out.

Ranma closed his eyes, and slowly turned off his senses one by one. The world was an externality, a distraction. There was no great enemy to face this time. No heroic battle. It was just himself, the only person Ranma had not faced during his stay at the dojo. The one person he had yet to defeat. And so, Ranma turned his minds eye to the inside, and prepared to do battle with himself. His mind so enthralled by the trance that he never heard the door to the dojo close.

* * *

Akane walked back to the kitchen, as quiet as she could manage so as not to disturb Ranma. She knew that he would be annoyed if he had noticed her watching him, but she couldn't help it, she was worried. He's changed since Saffron, she thought, her head bowed slightly as she stepped. Her eyes wandered back for a moment to the dojo, Ranma, why won't you talk to me about this?

* * *

"Hello, Lover," a feminine voice whispered from behind Ranma, as a small pair of hands slid past his shoulders and over his chest. "I've been waiting for you." 

Ranma instinctively pushed out of the girl's arms, and backed away before Akane walked in and clobbered him. "What the... Shampoo... Who?" Ranma asked, turning around to face the intruder for the first time. He was half expecting to see Shampoo's purple hair and lithe form standing before him, a surprise glomping or embrace had her handy work all over it. Instead standing before him was a petite girl with red hair, and blue eyes; wearing a red Chinese shirt and black pant outfit identical to the one Ranma was wearing. It was his girl half. "You! But how did you get back out? Cologne said that that the sunlight caused us to merge back into one," Ranma's eyes narrowed into little slits, "The old man hasn't been playing around with that soul splitting incense again has he?"

Ranma-chan guffawed as she walked across the room, "Have we really become that paranoid over the past two years?" Sitting down in front of Ranma she cocked her head to the side and thought for a second, "But then with all we've been through who could really blame us?"

"Then why did you come here?" Ranma asked, shifting back to a sitting position.

"I didn't" Ranko smiled sweetly, "you came here looking for me, Lover."

"What? Why would I come looking for you, I mean me... I mean... Whatever."

"That's easy," a coy smile drifted onto Ranko's face, "you came looking for me because I've been trying my damnedest to get your attention for the past few weeks. You're almost as thick headed as Akane thinks we are, did you know that?"

"Get my attention?"

"Lord, Lover, what did you think the dreams were for?"

"I don't know," he said, "I don't remember them when I wake up."

Ranko raised one eyebrow, "Really? Well in that case you and I have a lot to do," she said as she stood to her feet. With her small hands she reached out, grasped Ranma's wrist, and pulled him up.

"Hey where are you taking me," he said as she pushed him through the dojo door.

"Don't worry, Lover" she replied, "I've got something I want to show you."

* * *

Kasumi stood at the sink, washing the breakfast dishes, when she noticed her sister walk in. She had the 'storm cloud' look again, at least that had become Kasumi's pet name for this particular mood, when Akane became so frustrated and angry that you could see the lightning flash behind her eyes. "Akane, what's wrong?" Kasumi asked, hoping that the answer to whatever was behind that look didn't involve any type of food preparation on Akane's behalf. 

"Nothing" Akane said, her eyes never once rising to meet her sisters as she walked to the refrigerator. She opened it slowly, reached in and grabbed a bottle of milk, hesitated for a second, and then returned it back to its place on the shelf. Without saying a single word, she strode across the kitchen, towards her sister. Her arms wrapped around Kasumi's waist, as Akane buried her head in her older sister's chest, and cried. Kasumi stood for a moment in silence, not knowing what to say, doing the only thing she could think of, and held her little sister while she sobbed uncontrollably.

* * *

Ranma and Ranko stood in the middle cave. Ranma was doing his best to control his anger, and was failing miserably as he yelled at his girl half, "This is Saffron's cave isn't it? What in the hell are we doing here." 

"I told you," she replied coolly "I want to show you something."

"What could possibly be so important that you would have to drag me all the way back..."

"This," Ranko pointed, across the cave to a heap of blue and white in the corner.

"Oh, God, no." he breathed, as he pushed past Ranko and dashed towards the other side of the cave. His apprehension grew with each step that he took as his mind struggled to process the new information his eyes were receiving. The first thing he noticed was a shoulder, then two feet covered by Mary-Jane's. By the time that he could see the short hair, he already knew it was Akane. He reached out to touch her, hold her in his arms, but she was cold. "Akane wake up," he said as he took her into his arms. She wasn't breathing. He shook her hard, "Come on Tomboy, you can't do this to me." Her head rolled limply to the side, "You can't do this to me; you can't leave me." Tears dripped from his eyes and onto her cheeks as he cradled her in his arms.

"Hurts don't it, Love?"

Ranma gently laid Akane back on the ground, while his aura manifested around him, cold as ice. "You already know the answer to that," he said, spinning around faster that one would think possible.

Akane was dead, it was his fault, and she was gloating about it. He wanted to hurt her, make her suffer like he was suffering, and so he attacked. With a cold, calculating fury he probed her defenses, looking for an opening, but finding none. His girl half was more agile, slightly faster, and better at dodging then his boy half. Ranma would kick, only to find Ranko had moved out of range, he would punch only to have it blocked. "Why did he have to do it? Why couldn't he just back down? I didn't want to, but I saw her here like this and it hurt, and I couldn't stop him..."

"But why does it hurt so much?" She asked as she sidestepped a snap-kick.

"I don't know," he screamed at her, sensing an opening he lunged at her, throwing all of his weight behind the punch so as to deliver the coup de grace.

Ducking under and to the right of the blow, Ranko tapped her boy half on the shoulder, "Don't look down," she whispered in his ear, as he flew past.

"What?" he asked. Ignoring his girl half's advice, Ranma glanced at the cavern floor below him, and was quickly overcome by a falling sensation.

* * *

P-chan trailed Akane as she shambled back to her room, her breath broken by sobs, as tears trickled from her red eyes. The little black piglet was worried about her, but considering the fact that he had been in love with her for the past two years, his concern was not all that surprising. There was a pattern to their relationship, Akane and Ranma would get into a fight, her fiance would say or do something that upset her, and P-chan would follow her back to her room to console her. Sometimes she would yell and scream about what a jerk he was, others she would cry into her pillow. No mater what the result though, it was constantly Ranma's fault, no one else could hurt her so badly. 

Each time P-chan sat and listened to her it was as if someone had thrust a dagger in his heart and twisted the blade. Yet his pain wasn't just because she ached so badly. Rather it was that she always went back to him, no matter how much he hurt her. Tomorrow Ranma would face Kuno, Mouse, or some other slightly bent martial artist that had wondered in to town, and Akane would be there by his side, supporting him. Meanwhile, whether it is as P-chan, her pet; or Ryoga, the perpetual lost boy she called friend; he would be regulated to the sidelines, until she needed someone to help pick up the pieces again. What could he say? He loved her to much to leave, and so he followed Akane into her room, and waited for the knife to come.

"Oh, P-chan," Akane said, as she reached down to pick up the little black Piglet, "What am I going to do this time?"

"Bwee?" the piglet grunted as he nuzzled Akane gently with his snout.

"He won't even talk to me," she said as she set P-chan on her pillow, "Usually when he's angry he's yelling at me or teasing me; calling me 'un-cute', or 'Tomboy'. I get mad at him, he gets mad at me, and by morning we forget about it. He's not doing it this time."

"Bwee."

"God," she grabbed the nearest object she could find and hurled it across the room, the picture frame shattered on impact with her closet door, "It's just so frustrating."

"I hear him scream at night from the nightmares," Akane said as she collapsed to her knees, "I can hear him scream my name, so I know they are about me, but he keeps pushing me away when I ask about them."

"Bwee"

Akane looked across the room at the picture frame on the floor. It was a photo of the two of them eating at U-chan's. They were sitting at the grill, at their usual spot, for Saturday lunch. Ukyo, stood behind the counter. The chef and Ranma were carrying on an easy conversation while Akane leaned on the counter and watched. She was jealous of how he found it simple to talk to Ukyo. Their conversations seemed to come natural, flowing from topic to topic in a steady stream of words. There did not seem to be anything that he could not talk to her about. With Akane and her fiance however, it was different. The words were forced, and choppy. Even when she wanted to thank him or comfort him, their conversations developed into arguments. Only now they weren't even doing that.

"I don't think he likes me anymore," she turned around and looked back at P-chan, "maybe I should break the engagement. So that he can have someone he can talk to. Someone like Ukyo." Akane reached out, and pulled the black piglet close to her, as her eyes threatened to spill out into tears yet again.

"Bwee?" P-chan was shocked, for the past two years Akane had ranted, raved, and threatened Ranma's life, but in all that time she had never once discussed breaking off her engagement with him in their talks in her room. Sure, she had yelled it at him in public on several occasions, but in the sanctuary of her room, when she thought no one else was listening, she had never once considered the option, but now...

Akane drew in a slow breath, and sighed, "That seems to be the only thing left to do, I've tried everything else."

"Bwee," P-chan snorted in agreement.

"I'll tell him as soon as he finishes his workout," she said, gently setting the pig down on the ground before standing up. "I probably look like a mess; I should go wash up first." Akane opened the door to her room, and stepped out into the hallway. "P-chan, thank you for listening, it helped."

"Bwee" the piglet grunted, his cheeks burning bright red. This is it, he thought, When she calls of the engagement I can finally tell her how I feel. P-chan sank to the floor, giddy in his relief and joy, for the first time in two years, the knife had not come.

* * *

The cave had shifted, the ground beneath Ranma and Ranko had given way and now they were falling in what seemed to be a bottomless pit. The Saotome school of Anything Goes specialized in Arial combat, however, and the pair was still trading blows, verbally and physically as they plummeted to the earth. 

"I can't believe you had the gall to show me that," Ranma said as he fired a snap kick to Ranko's temple.

"You still haven't answered my question," Ranko's hand slipped over the top of Ranma's shin. With a flick of her hand she flipped herself so that she was falling slightly above her boy-half, "Why did it hurt?"

"I told you I don't know why it hurt," Ranma's hand circled around in a ridge-hand, "It just did, ok? It's not like I've got feelings for the tomboy or anything."

"Really," Ranko arched her back slightly, as Ranma's hand missed her nose by less than half an inch. "Then how do you explain that?" Ranko asked, her hand pointing behind Ranma, just over his left shoulder. Ranma looked, and instantly comprehended that somehow his girl-half had taken him to a different location, the cavern beneath Prince Toma's Island. In the distance a scene from the past was being replayed. He was falling, with Akane on his back, towards a Spring of Drowned Man.

At the end of the fall was everything Ranma had ever hoped for. Good-by curse. Good-by being chased by Happosi. Good-by kisses from jerks on ice skates. Good-by being hounded by Kuno. Good-by being afraid every time that it rains that everyone would find out how big of a freak he actually was. Good-by "he's practically a couple all by himself." Good-by girl half. But Akane was on his back, plummeting to the same spring. If she fell in as well, she would have to experience all the hurt, pain, fear, embarrassment, and rejection that Ranma had experienced with his curse. She would be the one who cringed every time a rainstorm passed by overhead. She would be the one that everyone stared at, as they muttered words like freak, and pervert. Ranma was torn, he could let them fall towards the spring, and be cured forever, or he could destroy the spring with a chi attack, evaporating the water before they hit the ground, and keep Akane from living with his curse. When he thought about it there was not a decision to be made.

"Akane," he had screamed as he readied his ki attack, "the you that you are, is the you that I l..." the past Ranma bit his tongue, as he gathered his chi in his hands. A bright blue glow shown brightly for a second, and then exploded as a beam of energy lanced from his hands into the spring below. The water buckled, and boiled as it erupted all around them. Within seconds the past Ranma and Akane had landed, dry and safe.

"How was the sentence supposed to end, Lover," Ranko asked from behind Ranma.

"The you that you are, is the you that I love." Ranma whispered quietly as his feet found the earth. The scenery shifted and he and Ranko were back in the dojo once again.

"That's why it hurts when you think of her like that." Ranko said. Ranma just looked away.

* * *

Ryoga shouldered his pack as he walked out the door to the Tendo home. As soon as Akane had left he had changed from P-chan to Ryoga using the hot water in the bathroom. Ranma always stashed his clothes in the bathroom for him while he was P-chan, making it easy for him to come and go as he pleased. Yet, if everything worked out, this would be the last time he stayed at the dojo as P-chan. 

This was it, his chance, his time to tell Akane how he felt, but first he needed to acquire something. This meant that he would have to leave for a time, but when he returned he would make everything better for Akane. Don't worry my love, he thought as he crossed the threshold, I leave you now, but when I return it will be with our engagement ring.

* * *

Ranma stood in the center of the dojo with Ranko, the circle was complete, but instead of answers he found himself filled with even more questions. "So what do I do now?" he asked, his head dropping to the floor. 

Behind him the door to the dojo opened. Nodoka and Genma stepped into the dojo. "You do what is honorable," his father said as he moved to Ranko's right.

"You do the right thing," his mother said, stepping between Ranma's girl-half and his father.

"You do what you want to do." Ranko said, making sure that her blue eyes caught his.

"So I should tell her how I feel then?"

"For the sake of the honor of the School of Anything Goes, Yes" Genma said, nodding his head solemnly.

"But what if she doesn't feel the same way about me?" Ranma asked. He thought back to all the times she had called him a pervert. The day they had first met, when she had called him a 'couple all by himself'. She had never been able to accept his curse. It was the thing she always teased him about, the thing that always made her uncomfortable in his presence, the thing that made him a freak in her eyes. "What if she can't accept my curse? I'm afraid she won't want me."

Nodoka laughed, "Since when has my son let his fears keep him from something that he wants?" Her hand reached out and touched her son's face, and lifted his head, so that she could see the pride in her eyes. "My son is too much of a man among men to let such a small thing as fear stop him."

"Hai," Ranma said, his jaw trembling slightly with fear and apprehension, the scenery shifted again as the walls of the dojo gave way to a thick mist. "And if she rejects me?"

"Then you've done what's honorable," Genma said as he disappeared into the mist.

"You've done what's right," his mother replied as the mist enveloped her as well.

"But most importantly," Ranko said as she began to fade, "you won't ever regret not telling her how you feel."

* * *

Ranma opened his eyes, and roused himself from his meditation. From the stiffness in his legs and the ache in his back he judged that he had been meditating in the dojo for several hours now. His mind was full of questions still, but at least now he understood what he had to do. Ranma stood to his feet and walked towards the door. He had to find Akane and soon. Before he lost his resolve.

* * *

Akane sat at her desk and waited for Ranma to emerge from the Dojo below. Her window held a perfect view of the yard, allowing her to see everything from the koi pond, to the dojo entrance. Most days she would just sit here and stare out the window, letting her thoughts drift by like the clouds in the sky, but today she could not afford that luxury. She sat staring at the entrance of the dojo, determined that Ranma would not leave without her noticing. She could not let him get by her today, she had to tell him. She had to let him go, no matter how much it hurt. And she had to do it soon, before her will caved. 

The door to the dojo slid open, as a familiar pair of black pants and red shirt emerged from within. This is it, she thought as he quietly scanned the yard. She stood to her feet, turned around, and drew in a slow breath to steady her shaking knees. If she was going to do this with any amount of composure left, it would have to be done quickly, and so determined she stalked across her room, reached out to the knob, and twisted the door open.

"Hey, Akane," a voice called from behind her, "Where are you going?" Akane turned on her heels. There he was in her window, doing his best to look anywhere but in her eyes. "Look," Ranma said, his eyes finally settling on the broken picture frame on the floor, "I... that is, we need to talk."

Akane dropped to the floor, her knees buckling as her last bit of determination fled, "Hai."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2 "Love, Sister, It's just a kiss away." -Give me Shelter, Rolling Stones. 

Outside the Tendo dojo, a koi flipped in the pond, making a loud splash which could be heard all the way up to Akane's room. For a normal person, the sound of the water lapping against the sides of the pool would have been soothing, but for Ranma, at the present moment, no other sound could have been more alarming. Extending his chi out to its furthest limits the pig-tailed boy searched for the culprit which had set off his danger sense. It did not take long for him to find it. With a practiced silence he glided to Akane's side. "We need to talk," he said, scooping her up in his arms, "but let's do it somewhere else."

The short-haired girl clutched her arms tightly around Ranma's neck and shoulders, as they dashed through the window and bounced up onto the roof. The pair leapt from rooftop to rooftop as they trekked across Nerima. Ranma cradled his fiance firmly in his arms, keeping her closer to him with each jump; trying his best not to be distracted by the scent of her hair. It was her smell that had always gotten to him, ever since the first time he had carried her like this, during the fight with Ryoga, before he had learned about P-chan. They had landed on the roof, him holding Ryoga's umbrella with one arm, and Akane with the other. He had known that they had not gone far enough to be completely safe from the lost boy, but sitting up there, holding her in his arms, and smelling her hair, the world seemed to slip away.

I guess I should have asked her not to change her shampoo, he thought as he hurdled across a gap between two apartments.

Akane; however, was doing her best to reign in the emotions that were flittering about the pit of her stomach. If everything went according to plan, this would be her final wild ride over the city's rooftops. The final time that he threw her about, and hauled her around, like a big ape in a B movie. The final time he held her. Akane lifted her head off of his shoulder and watched the dojo disappear behind them. Pulling out a reserve of determination, she willed herself not to cry. She could not let him know how bad this was going to hurt. The last thing she wanted was his sympathy. Regardless, a single tear traced a path across her cheek.

* * *

Nabiki stood at her door, and watched as the two fiances disappeared from sight. A half smile creased her face. She didn't know exactly what was happening between her younger sister and Ranma but whatever it was, it had to be interesting, and in Nerima, interesting was worth a great deal of yen. There was money to be made here, she could feel it. I just have to figure out what's going on, she thought. 

"You can stop eavesdropping now," Nabiki said, turning back to her desk and the ledgers it held. She only worked on her private accounts in the solitude of her room, "they're gone already."

Soun snapped his fingers and retreated down the stairs, as Genma, who was still a Panda, grumbled. The two had left their game hoping to hear whether or not their children would make up. With the failed wedding, the arranged marriage had been temporarily placed on hold. However, as tense as Akane and Ranma's relationship had been over the course of the past few weeks those plans were now in danger of being derailed entirely. If something didn't change, and soon, the two Schools would never be joined. But, until their children came home, there was nothing the fathers could do but return to their game.

"Oh well," Kasumi said, following closely behind her father, "I guess I'll go make them some tea for when they get back."

* * *

Ranma set Akane down on the roof of the high school; as he looked around one last time to make absolutely certain that no one had followed him. He had done his best to throw off any possible pursuers, dashing wildly about Nerima in a zigzag pattern he had copied from Ryoga. Really, it was no wonder P-chan was getting lost all the time, he couldn't walk in a strait line to save his life. However, as random a destination the school seemed to be, it had been Ranma's intent to alight here from the beginning. 

Any one who would be looking for him would know that school was the one place that Ranma hated the most. It was common knowledge that the pigtailed martial artist would rather take on Herb, Lime, and Mint than sit through class. Which was why the roof of the high school had been his intended destination all along; no one would expect him to go there willingly, especially over summer break. Ranma was hoping that particular expectation would buy him and Akane a few minutes of privacy. After listening for several minutes for the sound of bicycle bells, "Ran-chan", "Ranma-somma", "Arien"or the ever popular "Die Ranma", he relaxed, confident that they were finally alone. Ranma's stomach flittered as he fought to find his words. They always seemed to flee at moments like this, when the nervousness of the moment seemed to shift his brain into neutral, and the jittery energy coursing through his body made him feel weak, yet somehow more alive.

"Akane... I um..."

"Ranma, I..." Akane interrupted, wanting to end things as quickly as possible, before her resolve broke, unleashing the torrent of emotions she was tentatively clutching to. "There's something I need to tell you."

Akane glanced up at her fiancee. Oh God, he had that look in his eyes. Not the one that filled with the arrogant confidence he was so famous for, the one he wore in his fights, when all eyes were on him, and you just knew he was about to finish it. No, his eyes only did this when he didn't think anyone else was watching. When he would sit all by himself on the roof at night and watch the stars, when his defenses were down, if only momentarily. She had caught him like that a time or two, only for an instant if that long. His eyes reflecting back at her: Just don't hurt me. She looked away, her eyes searching for something else to focus on, just as long as she didn't have to look into his eyes.

"I know you and I never asked for this engagement," she said, her eyes finally settling down in the general direction of Uc-chan's.

"Yeah," Ranma started, "but I don't..."

"Please," Akane's fists balled up at her sides, as she fought back the rising waves of frustration and anger. Couldn't he see how much this was hurting her? "Let me finish first."

"This isn't something that we wanted." She took a deep breath, "I mean... Look, we're always fighting. I'm either yelling at you..."

"Yelling?" Ranma asked.

Akane paused for a moment, her knuckles turning white as she tightened her fist. Ok, so he had a point, there were times when she did a great deal more than yell at him. "Alright, so I hit you from time to time. It's just that you make me so frustrated. If you weren't such an insensitive j..." Akane's voice had grown in intensity, the fear and frustration bubbling inside of her until it threatened to explode. Exhaling, she stilled herself; she wanted to rare back and clobber him as hard as she could, but she couldn't break off the engagement if Ranma was unconscious. "You see, we're doing it again, we can't say more than a few words to each other without it turning into an argument."

Akane sighed, "You... We don't deserve this Ranma, its doing neither of us any good. Wouldn't you rather be with someone else?" The tears welled up behind Akane's eyes, and spilled onto her cheeks. "You deserve someone you can talk to. Some one you can laugh with. Someone you love. We just aren't right for one another. I want to call off the engagement."

Ranma stood there, numb. Akane's mallet weighed exactly 50 kilo's. On a good day she could swing it at a velocity of 20 meters per second, faster if she was really upset. She had bashed him with her mallet exactly 237 times over the course of the past year. Yet, at no time had any of those blows struck him as viciously as the words she had just spoken.

A gust of wind flurried across the school grounds below, as a flock of sparrows took wing, fleeing some unseen predator.

* * *

The eternally lost boy stared blankly ahead, his eyes locked in an infinite gaze, as he let his thoughts aimlessly wonder about the day's events. Akane was going to break off the engagement, for good this time. What a joyous day! Ryoga closed his eyes replayed the scene yet again. If he concentrated hard enough he could just hear their voices: "I'm sorry Ranma, but I can not marry you," Akane would say, dressed in her yellow and lace sundress. "You're leaving me," Ranma would reply, "But, why?" "Because I already love another." "But what man would be as dashing and handsome as to replace me?" Ranma would ask, "Tell me so that I might challenge him for your heart once again." "One you could never hope to defeat," She would say, a wistful smile upon her face, "For I am in love with Ryoga Hibiki!" "Ryoga!" Ranma would despair, "Curses, for I could never hope to foil one such as him! I have lost you." "Oh, Ryoga," Akane would reply, turning her back on his rival. "Come to me my Darling," and he would run to her, as fast as his little black legs would carry him, jump into her arms, and gently nuzzle her breast with his snout. 

Ryoga stopped and blinked. Wait, that's not how the fantasy was supposed to go. It did; however, remind him of the other problem he had to deal with before he could propose to Akane. She still didn't know that he was P-Chan. Ryoga sighed; he had been so preoccupied with his quest of finding the perfect engagement ring for Akane that he hadn't stopped to consider what would happen when she found out. The lost boy bit his bottom lip. If her reactions to any of Ranma's mischief were to be any indication, then when he told her, he could expect her to react with mallets, and a free trip to Kyoto curtsy of Akane's wrath. The image sent a shudder up and down his spine.

The thought shook him out of his trance and Ryoga for the first time in hours, looked around at his surroundings. It was dark, which was strange, because the business district was usually filled with people, lights and noise; and since when did it get so dark so early in Tokyo?

"Hey kid," a voice cried out to his left as a bright light shown in his face. Ryoga stopped, he recognized the language the voice was speaking in as English, but the dialect the speaker used was more British in nature. "What are you doing down here without a hard hat?"

Ryoga grimaced, he was lost again. Switching languages, he turned to answer the man who was fast approaching him. "I'm sorry, I'm looking for the Tokyo business district, you wouldn't happen to know the way?"

The voice paused for a second, "Tokyo..." Ryoga could hear the disbelief that laced the man's words; embarrassed he grabbed a lump of coal off of the ground and began to toss it about, "Kid, this is a diamond mine... In India."

"What?" Ryoga asked, squeezing the coal as hard as he could. How could he have wondered so far away in only a few hours? "You mean this isn't Japan?"

"Look," the miner pointed a grungy hand towards Ryoga's left, "Take the third elevator to the surface, if you hop a buss here in a bout thirty minutes, you can be in New Deli in a couple of hours. I'm sure you can catch a flight to Tokyo from there."

"Thank you," Ryoga said. His hand relaxing, a raw diamond resting in place of the coal, the lost boy turned right, and stalked off deeper into the tunnels.

"Aren't you going to tell him he's headed the wrong way?" one of the miner's co-workers asked.

The miner thought about the diamond resting in the teen's hand, and shook his head. "You tell him."

* * *

"Of all the stupid, clumsy, un-cute, tomboy things you've ever done," Ranma said, as he grabbed Akane by the arms and twisted her around, staring her down, "this one really takes the cake." 

"Stupid," Akane's fists bawled up at her side, as her aura, glowing red, wisped about her. "I tell you that you're free to be with whomever you want to be with, and you call that stupid?"

"No, you're right," Ranma said, pushing his nose into the girl's personal space. "That wasn't stupid, it was idiotic! What do you mean I deserve someone else?"

"Look at us, Ranma," Akane shoved back, letting the full fury of her anger flow. "Here we go, at it again. Wouldn't you rather be with someone else you can talk to?"

"Like who?" Ranma asked, as he circled around Akane, counterclockwise. "Are you seeing someone else?"

"No!"

"Is there someone else that you want to date?"

"No," Akane huffed, threw back her head and snorted, "Of course there isn't anyone out there I want to see!"

"In that case I was wrong, this isn't idiotic," he said, "It's moronic!"

"What is so wrong with wanting to let you have someone you can talk to?" Akane said, throwing her hands up in the air in frustration.

"Who else out there could I possibly want?" Ranma shouted back.

"I don't know," Akane said, irritation laced heavily in her tone, "maybe Ukyo?"

"Damn it, Akane. Why do you think I want Ukyo for some reason?"

"Because you can talk to her," Akane said, stepping away from Ranma.

"But I don't love her, you stupid Tomboy," the pig-tailed martial artist said.

"And, why not?"

"Because," Ranma grabbed her arm, and twirled her so that he could see her eyes once again, "I love you."

Akane stood for a moment in silence, her eyes threatening to spill into tears. How long had she waited to hear those three words, without her fiance acting under the influence of love potions, magic spells, or Amazon artifacts? Yet here he was, he had said it; and she didn't believe a word of it. It reminded her to much of another time, not to long after they had met, when they were sparing in the dojo:

"You know, you're cute when you smile," he had said, sidestepping her punch. Akane had just stood there; mute, as Ranma poked her in the middle of the forehead with his index finger. "Gotcha." 

Gotcha. He never said anything like that to her unless it was just to get her unbalanced enough to take advantage of her. Well she was tired of it: tired of the games, tired of playing Russian roulette with him. Akane reached out with her right hand, and struck Ranma's cheek as hard as she could. The slap echoed across the rooftops.

* * *

Nabiki walked down the stairs to the kitchen. It had been unusually hot this year in the Tokyo area, and the temperature had already climbed into the low 90's. Without the benefit of central heat and air, the summer was usually tolerable, if just barely. During a heat wave like this, it was unbearable. A few luxuries such as ice and lemonade; however, made the summer heat a little easer to cope with though. Fortunately for everyone, Kasumi always kept the kitchen well stocked with such items, and Nabiki was more than willing to partake of them. 

Nabiki had just passed the dining room when she heard her father. "Nabiki, come here for a minute, I want to talk to you."

Nabiki rolled her eyes and stepped back towards the dining room. Leaning against the door jam, her eyes narrowed into slits as she studied her father. "Yes?"

The middle Tendo daughter did not like what she saw. Soun sat on the back porch, with Genma. Everything about the scene looked innocent, but of the three Tendo girls, Nabiki had been blessed with the ability to read her opponents, and it was the expression on her father's face that worried her. He was doing his best to look nonchalant, but the gleam in his eyes betrayed his intentions. The only other time that she had seen it, her younger sister gained a cross-gender fiancee. No, this did not bode well at all.

"Nabiki," Soun's eyes never left the game board, "I've been thinking about what we talked about over breakfast this mourning, and I've come to a decision."

"Talked?" Nabiki arched her right eyebrow. She didn't remember discussing anything with her father, much less telling him anything that would require a decision on his part.

"Yes, about you choice in colleges," Nabiki's jaw dropped. The old man was known to meddle needlessly in his daughters' affairs, but surely even he would not have the audacity to do what she thought he was about to do. "I don't think you should attend college in the States, it's much too far away. Therefore I have decided that you will be attending Tokyo in the fall."

Nabiki closed her eyes and drew in a deep breath. So, he did have the audacity to do that, but then what else could she expect from a man who had arranged a marriage for his daughters at birth? Calming herself, she bit her bottom lip, "No, I'm not."

"What did you say?"

"I'm not attending Tokyo in the fall."

Soun looked across the yard at the koi pond, "You have no choice in the matter, I won't pay for any other school."

"And your point is?" Nabiki rolled her eyes at her father.

"You can't afford to go if I refuse to pay."

"I don't need for you to pay," Nabiki said as she turned her back to her father, "All of my choices gave me a full scholarship, plus expenses; you don't have a choice in the matter... Daddy." Sarcasm dripped from Nabiki's voice like venom as she walked past the room, towards the kitchen.

"She has a point there, Tendo," Genma said as he shuffled the pieces around the board, "It looks as though there's not much you can do about it."

"That's only a minor set back, Saotome," Soun looked back at the board in amazement. Genma always seemed to be able to miraculously turn the tide against him in their games in just one move. "I still have three months to change her mind in."

* * *

"What was that for?" Ranma said; his hand reached up to stroke the red hand print that throbbed on his cheek. "Geez Akane, I just told you I love you, and you slap the shit out of me. Talk about a Tomboy." 

"I hit you," Akane's anger was barely contained as it rippled through her voice, "because, you didn't mean it."

"What do you mean I didn't mean it?" Ranma through up his hands, and stalked off to the edge of the roof. With all the incredulous things she could have possibly said... "Of course I meant it, I said it didn't I?"

"See," Akane said, crossing her arms at her waist. Her eyes locked on to the pig-tailed martial artist's back as he walked away. "There you go running away, again. You say you love me; then prove it."

Ranma stopped; his back going strait and stiff. His hands clenched at his side. "I've rescued you from kidnapers; fought oversized critters, and crazed martial artists; destroyed any chance I might ever have for a cure; and if it weren't for the fact that he was a god, and by default immortal, practically killed Saffron... all for you." Ranma turned on his heels, and marched over to the short haired girl. "Hasn't that been enough?"

"No Ranma," Akane said, pushing her nose into his personal space until it was just a few inches away from his, "it's not. You know as well as I, that you would have done those things anyhow. Your pride won't let you back down from anything. If that had been Shampoo or Ukyo you still would have done it, and you can't convince me otherwise."

The pig tailed martial artist let out a scream in frustration, as Akane, intent on staring him down, kept the tip of her nose just a few millimeters from his. What else could he do to convince her that he really loved her? He had already slain a dragon... sort of... Swam the Sea of Japan... Journeyed to the corners of the earth... Was there anything left he could do? His mind spun in circles, as it whirled about, trying to find a solution to the problem, and then he remembered that day in the dojo, when he had been kissed for the first time by a man:

"I dare you to kiss me," she had said. 

He had not been able to of course, their families had interrupted with a video camera, spoiling what would be a rare moment between the two. As pointless as the dare had been though, it gave him an idea. Before the safety mechanisms in his brain could kick in, Ranma reached out, grabbed Akane's shoulders, and tried one last thing to persuade the short haired girl that he loved her.

* * *

Nabiki walked up the stairs, lemonade in hand, confident that she had won the first round with her father. She had been watching her sister's battles with him over the engagement, and had developed a solid understanding of where she had gone wrong. Akane had let the fool think he had a chance of winning. Nabiki however, was determined on not making her sister's mistake. No, this daughter would be left out of her father's schemes. She had her own life to live, and she would be damned if she was going to let her father of all people get in her way. 

The middle daughter twisted the latch to her room, only to be met with her father's handy work. Flyers and brochures from Tokyo University lined the walls and ceiling of her room. Every square inch of space, every nook, and every cranny was filled with information on the university's School of Business, dorm life, scholarship opportunities, and success stories which had been spawned by the school. Without letting her anger slip she quietly closed the door, and pulled the Harvard brochures out from underneath her bed. Suddenly four years in the greater Boston area wasn't looking so bad.

* * *

The first thing that Akane realized when she came to her senses was that she was being kissed, but by whom? Judging by the firm grip her assailant had on her shoulders, and the flash of red silk and black hair, she surmised that it was Ranma who was doing the kissing. On impulse she raised her right hand and slapped him again. 

Ranma pulled back, at the sharp pain on his already sore cheek, "What was that f..."

Akane didn't give him a chance to finish. Instead she reached out, grabbed her fiancee's ears and kissed him. His mouth still open in mid-sentence; their tongues, so used to sparring with one another, met for the first time on friendly terms. Two years of frustration and pent up emotions were released in that perfect moment, as the light from the sun painted the sky in a beautiful array of reds and oranges.

Reluctantly Akane broke the kiss, and drew in an awkward breath, "Never without my permission, Baka."

"Point taken, Tomboy," Ranma smiled. It was the same insult he always used when he wanted to get under her skin, but this time it was missing the malice usually present when he spoke it.

"Tomboy!" Akane said, anger starting to rise in her voice. Ranma placed a single finger over her lips.

"Hey," he said with a grin, wrapping his arms around her, "I'll have you know that I love a Tomboy."

Akane sighed as she turned towards the sunset, and leaned into the pig-tailed boy. How many nights had she fantasized about this? And now... But wait, what came next? All of her fantasies had ended here. There was still Ukyo, and Shampoo. Not to mention their families. How would they deal with it all? "Ranma," Akane's head turned towards her fiancee, "What do we do now?"

"I'm not sure," he said, "I guess we just keep things going the way that they are for now. I mean, we are still fiancees after all."

"No we aren't." Ranma looked down at the short haired girl, her face took on a dead pan expression, "I broke off the engagement, remember."

The pig-tailed boy let go of Akane and took a step back. He thought he heard her say something, but was not quite sure that he had heard her right. "Wait," he said, "I thought we took care of that."

"No, you told me that you love me, kissed me and I kissed you back," Akane jabbed her finger into his chest, "Just because I love you doesn't mean I don't still want to call off the engagement."

"Wait," A coy smile slipped onto Ranma's face, "say that again."

"Say what again? That I still want to call off the engagement?"

"No, before that," he frowned, "The 'I love you' part."

"Oh," Akane blushed again, "I love you, Ranma."

Ranma leapt high into the air in a back flip and landed on the ledge surrounding the school roof. Cupping his hands to his mouth he whooped, "Hey, everyone, did you hear that! She loves me!"

Akane's face flushed even more, as she ran quickly to her fiancee and pulled him down. "What are you doing?" she said as she looked around to make sure no one had seen, "Some one might hear you."

"Good, I want them to," Ranma said, as he picked her up by the waste and twirled her around.

"And what if Shampoo or Ukyo happened to be down there?" Akane asked as her feet touched the ground. "You remember the wedding don't you?"

"We've been through this," Ranma sighed, "Uc-chan said she was sorry, I thought you had forgiven her for that already."

"I have," Akane mumbled, "but I still don't want to take any chances. For the past two years you've had me worrying day and night that you would choose one of them over me. I'm tired of this. I love you Ranma," Akane said, her shoulders heaving in a sigh, "But now I want them to know that you chose me. Not them... me."

"But Akane..." Ranma started.

"No 'buts', Ranma, the engagement is off, until I get a ring." Akane sat down on the ledge, and turned away from the pig tailed boy. Her hands, cold, clammy and white with nervousness, wrung at the hem of her dress.

Ranma sat down behind her and rested his right hand on her shoulder, "I guess this means I need to find a job then."

Akane twirled back around, her face beaming as she cried one last time that night, "Really?"

"Yep," Ranma sighed, "I need to get that ring fast if we're going to get married before the end of the break."

Akane pulled back slightly, "Why so soon? We've got all the time in the world now."

Ranma shook his head, "Maybe, but then what if we run into someone like Saffron again?" Lines of worry covered Ranma's face, as he turned to watch the sunset. "What if one day I don't get there in time and something happens to you? What if I finally meet the person I just can't beat, and I don't come back home?" Ranma sighed, "You're right, we might have all the time in the world, but then again we might not."

Akane studied her love's face carefully. The cocky, arrogant mask had lifted, and under it, she saw for the first time the crack in her knight's armor. He was afraid. "That's what your dreams are about aren't they?"

"Yes," Ranma said. It was only a partial lie, he still couldn't remember the dreams, but he was sure there was more to it than that.

"Ranma," she said, slightly squeezing his hand, "If you can get me a ring with in a month, I'll marry you before school starts back."

"And if I can't?" Ranma swallowed.

Akane shifted back into his arms to watch as the sun slid below the horizon, and let out a mock sigh, "I guess I'll just have to marry you anyway."

* * *

Cologne sat behind the counter at the cat cafe as she thumbed through the day's mail. Bills, bills, bills and more bills. Who could have ever guessed that living in Nerima would be so much more costly than living in the village? But then who would have known that it would have been so much more fun as well? 

Living such a long life was as much of a blessing as it was a curse. Over the past five hundred years she had watched her children, and great grandchildren grow up, and pass away. And never, no matter how honorable the battle, or how bright and beautiful the spirit, was it a good thing for a parent to bury a child. Yet, she had some how survived, and born through, as was expected of an elder of the tribe. Thus, five hundred years had passed in the village, as steady and regular as the waves of the ocean they had come.

Once long ago, a wise man once wrote that there was nothing new under the sun. Cologne understood first hand the truth of that statement. There is a pattern to life, if you watch long enough you can find it. Cologne had found that pattern four hundred years ago, and life for her had become... boring. That is, until the arrival of the Son-in-law.

The chaos that surrounded him made life exciting again. The elder never knew what was going to happen next, and as a result life had become interesting again. The past two years had been the most fun that she had had in ages. For that reason, she smiled as she opened the letters one by one, that is, until she reached the last one.

It was from the village. Under normal circumstances she would have been ecstatic to receive news from home, the elders had grown jealous of the time that she spent here, and often wrote to her, begging for updates on the Son-in-law's exploits. But for some reason the letters had been coming less and less frequently, and although the news contained within was still good, the pattern of their arrival had began to worry the old Amazon, until last month, the letters had finally stopped. Now this letter had arrived, only judging by the date on the letter it had been sent over a month ago. With a wrinkled brow Cologne read the letter.

_Honored Elder,_ _Good news! The Party has finally assigned a new magistrate to govern the prefecture. Maybe this one will only take from us what the state designates as our allotment for taxes, but then this would be asking to much, wouldn't it._ _On other matters, concerning your last letter; if things are going as poorly for your great granddaughter as you say, then you are correct in notifying us. The council deliberated on the matter for quite a while, but we reached a decision. If the occasion does arise that the boy does not take her as his bride, then you have our permission to carry out your plan._ _Stay young, and know that we all eagerly await your next letter. Perfume, has bet the council five lambs that Akane still won't figure out who her pet actually is by the end of the month._ _-The Council._

Cologne tucked the letter away, and turned off the lights in the kitchen.

"Shampoo, my love," Mousse cried from upstairs.

"Silly duck-boy, Shampoo no like you," her granddaughter screamed back at him. There was a loud bang, followed by the warbling sound of a lid, lazily spinning to a stop. Cologne smiled, she would wait to tell the youngsters about the letter later, she didn't want to ruin their fun just yet.

* * *

Ranma set Akane down on the floor as he turned to make sure that no one had watched him carry her back to her room. It was at times like this that he was glad that his father had taught him how to leap from rooftop to rooftop, and into and out of second story windows. It was just dark enough outside, that maybe no one had seen the two of them, and they could have just enough time together to say good-night. 

"Are you sure about this?" Akane whispered as she pulled him to her in the darkness.

"We went over this on the way back home, Tomboy," Ranma wrapped his arms around her and squeezed her tight as he kissed her one last time, "It's the only way we can make sure that we don't get rail-roaded into another wedding before I can get you that ring."

"Would that be so bad?" Akane asked.

"I thought you wanted them to know that this was our decision and not theirs?"

"I do," Akane said into his chest, "I'm just going to miss this, that's all."

"Who said we had to stop, we'll just have to be careful about it," Ranma shrugged, "Look, leave your window unlocked and I'll tell you good-night before you go to bed."

Akane sighed, she had been doing that more often as of late, "I guess that will just have to do then. I guess the only question then is how long can we keep this a secret."

"No," Nabiki's voice spoke from the darkness behind them, "the question is, how much are you willing to pay to keep this a secret?"

* * *

Well, there is the rewrite of chapter 2... enjoy 


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

"I wake up to beat the sun from her glory  
I'm only one cigarette away from mobility  
It's always punch in punch out  
go to work and go back home  
there's only one chance left  
and I know and I know where she is waiting."  
-Seven Mary Three, "Punch in, Punch out" 

Cologne sat at the counter of the cat cafe, cataloguing the current stocks for her Sunday shopping trip when Ranma stepped through the door. A quick study of his features confirmed that the information that she had bought from the mercenary had been accurate. The Son-in-law had not been sleeping well as of late. But then, every scrap of knowledge she had gleaned from the middle Tendo had proven to be true... Eventually. 

He was trying to hide it. There was still a spring to his step, and his face had the half-smirk mask of confidence he bore so well. It would be hard indeed to tell if there were anything out of the ordinary with the son-in-law, but then he was three-hundred years to young to fool an Amazon elder. The signs were all there if you knew what to look for. The crow's feet, the spider web of red that fanned out from his irises, not to mention the barely visible circles under his eyes. She had seen it numerous times. Many times the victim had been one of her more promising students. The first kill was always the hardest. 

"Come in Son-in-law," she said, bringing her pipe to her lips, "Something weighs on your mind. Pull up a seat, and sit a while to chat." 

Ranma walked up to the counter, grabbing a stool on his way. "What makes you think I've got something I want to talk about?" 

Cologne chuckled to herself, "I am four-hundred years to old to believe that, boy," she said as he sat down in the stool, his arms folded across its back as he leaned over it. The old mummy poured herself a cup of foul smelling tea, "But I will let your comment stand for now. You will talk when you are ready." 

"And what is that supposed to mean?" Ranma asked, his chest puffed out slightly at the insult. 

"Hear already about nightmare." Shampoo's voice said from behind him, "It keep Arien up at night, yes? Ranma should come with Shampoo. Shampoo know way give good dreams, yes?" 

"Yes... I mean no," Ranma said, climbing the stool, to place a bit more distance between him and her. Shampoo gazed at him as a tabby looks at a goldfish. 

"Ranma," Mouse said through gritted teeth, as he looked up from the table he was bussing. 

Cologne tossed a glass filled with cold water at the boy, "Hey, Mr. Part-Timer, what have I told you about trying to start fights on the clock?" 

Mouse side stepped the water, catching the glass in mid-air and placed it with the rest of the morning dishes. "Yes, old ghoul." 

Cologne smiled, if only briefly. The training was going well, and the boy had shown considerable improvement through the years. His reflexes and stamina was getting better. If he continued to improve at this rate she could begin to instruct him in some advanced techniques. But then, she would have to find a way to disguise her instruction as either abuse or work. His struggle wouldn't be nearly so interesting if he ever knew that she wasn't completely set against him. Besides, there was some truth to the old saying about prizes gained to easily... 

The Son-In-Law grabbed the counter, "Look, what's going on in my head is my business, so just butt out!" 

"As you wish, boy," Cologne said, as she poured him a cup of tea, but try this. Trust me it helps." 

"Oh?" Ranma raised an eyebrow and glanced down at the cup suspiciously. 

"Her name was Juju." Cologne said gazing down at her tea, "She was jealous that Marjoram chose to challenge myself instead of her. I made several attempts to end it using less forceful measures, but in the end I had no choice." 

"You were married?" Ranma asked. Amazon women only married outsider males who could best them in single combat. This left the pig-tailed boy trying to imagine the type of man who would bed the old mummy. A shudder worked its way involuntarily up his spine. 

Mousse laughed as he gave the pig tailed boy a disdainful look. Shampoo flashed her unwanted suitor a harsh glance, "How Arien think Great Grandmother be Great Grandmother if she no have husband?" 

Ranma shrugged, and took a sip of the tea. It tasted both sweet and bitter, but the brew was not too unpleasant. "Not bad," he said as he took another sip, "What's in it?" 

"Chamomile, Green Tea, St. John's Wart, and crushed, lifetime-strength, true-love pill," the elder said. Ranma gagged, closed his eyes, turned his head as the tea spewed from his mouth in a fine mist. The old Amazon chuckled softly to herself, "I love that joke. You can relax Son-in-Law..." He exhaled and opened his eyes slowly as the elder's eyes became slits. "For now... You want something from me. What is it?" 

Ranma reached behind his head and grabbed his ponytail, "What makes you think I want something?" 

"You never come by unless you want something or you're hungry," Mousse said, as he leaned against the kitchen door, hands folded across his chest. 

"And since Arien no order..." Shampoo said. 

"What is it that you want?" Cologne finished. 

Ranma sighed. He was a terrible liar. On more than one occasion he had lost vast sums of money and property at the poker table. Whatever he told the old ghoul he had to be careful or he would give it all away. Dammit, why had he agreed to Nabiki's plan in the first place? 

"I give you 3000 yen, and this is the best that you can do?" Ranma asked, "The Cat Cafe? You... the 'Great Nabiki', the Ice Queen... The Cat Cafe?" 

"Yes, dammit, that was the best that I could do," Nabiki's eyes narrowed into fine slits, "I called in every favor, and pulled every string I could find." 

"But..." 

"No 'Buts'," Nabiki growled, "Ranma, I called every business in a three city radius. No one would take you. Hell, a few places even offered to pay me to find you a job somewhere else." 

"How much," Ranma said, his eyebrows perked in interest. 

"Enough to clear your account," Nabiki snapped, Ranma you and your gang of friends have such a reputation for wanton destruction that this really is the only option left open to us." 

"So what do we do when the old ghoul asks why I need a Job? Everyone knows I'm a terrible liar." 

Nabiki shrugged, "Then tell the truth... Just don't tell them all of it."

* * *

Ukyo stood over her grill, and watched the pedestrians rush past her shop. It was a quarter passed two, and she had just finished cleaning up from the lunch dishes. Everything had died down at Uc-chan's and more than likely would not pick up again until after dinnertime. She had sent Konastu out fifteen minutes ago, with a list of everything that the cafe would need for the rest of the week. He would be gone for at least an hour or two. There was nothing left for her to do but to sit, and wait. 

Her eyes followed a well dressed salary-man as he walked past, a teddy-bear head popping out of his attache case. A slight smile crossed the cook's lips. It was probably his daughter's birthday tonight. He would walk through the door, with the bear tucked behind his back. His daughter would give him a hug, and ask about her present; pouting slightly. After a few minutes of interrogation, he would finally concede and hand over the bear. The birthday girl would pirouette to the living room, bear in tow, while the father would lean over to his wife, and give her a hello kiss. 

It was her favorite past time, to watch the pedestrians and imagine what they are like at home. To visualize them in their most private moments, when no one else was watching them and they could be themselves. Like, the woman pushing the stroller. She could just see her in the park, holding out her hands to her toddler as he wobbled towards her on shaky legs. 

And then there were the ones like the boy outside. Ukyo smiled wistfully as he fluttered by, nose buried in the classifieds. She wondered what it would feel like to have those strong arms wrapped around her pulling her closer, as she pushed his yellow bandana off of his forehead and out of his hair... 

"Wait" she paused, "Yellow Bandana... with black polka-dots?" There was only one person she knew who wore a bandana like that. Which meant... Öh god, no." She mumbled as she shook her head violently to clear her mind of the image. She had just been fantasizing about Ryoga, the eternally lost boy who had the crush on Akane. But that wasn't possible, she was Ranma's girl. She belonged to Ranma. She would never do something like that to him... It wasn't her fault, which meant that it must be Ryoga's. 

Brandishing her spatula over her head she dashed out the door, "Ryoga, you jerk, prepare to die." 

Walking along in what he thought was a small district on the outskirts of Shanghai; Ryoga looked up from his paper just in time to see the spatula descending like the hand of God.

* * *

"I need a job." Ranma said, folding his hands in his lap and bowing his head in shame. 

Cologne leaned on her staff. So that was what the boy had come to her for. But there was something else, something more to this. She could feel it in her five hundred year old bones. "Oh, why can't you take up a few more classes at the Dojo, surely Soun would allow it?" 

"I can't do that," Ranma said, "Neither Mr. Tendo or the old man can know about my needing money." 

"And why not?" the elder asked. 

"I kind of need it for an engagement ring." Ranma muttered. 

Shampoo dove across the room, knocking the Pig-tailed martial artist off of the stool, "Arien get ring for Shampoo! Shampoo to to happy!" 

"Shampoo! Wait..." 

Cologne sat and smiled to herself. Did Ranma actually believe that he could fool her? He needed a ring, therefore he had finally come to a decision on which fiance he would take. But it wasn't Ukyo. If it had been Ukyo he would be working at her restaurant. Neither was it her Great-Granddaughter. If that was the case then why didn't he come out and say who the ring was for? No, he was protecting this girl, trying to keep her from harm, and there was only one person that Son-in-Law would fight the forces of Hell and Heaven to defend. Her granddaughter had lost, but then there were plans in place to cover for that occurrence. The elder sighed, the excitement here would be ending soon, and then there would be nothing for her but the passage of the years. But there was still this to be played out. The others had yet to divine the truth, and watching him try to hide it would provide at least some entertainment. Besides, this gave her a chance to change her bet in Nabiki's fiancee pool. 

"You will start this afternoon, Son-In-Law," Cologne nodded solemnly, "You will help Shampoo catch the Lunch and Dinner rushes in your girl form, and assist Mousse afterwards with busting tables as a boy. I'll pay you 819 yen an hour and you'll receive a paycheck at the end of every week. Is this acceptable to you and your fiance?" 

"Grandmother, that perfect! Now Shampoo and Arien can practice for when married?" Shampoo threw her arms around Ranma's waist, tackling him as the two rolled across the floor. 

Mousse looked up from the table he was wiping down. Water was streaming through the knuckles of his fist as he gripped his dishrag. "What! If you think I'm going to just sit here and let him..." 

Cologne tagged the male Amazon in the forehead with the narrow end of her staff, sending him flying over the tables and into the restaurant wall. Like a high bounce ball, the elder followed the blind martial artist across the room. The world stopped spinning for Mousse after his head hit the wall. His glasses hung loosely from his ears. Everything in the restaurant was blurry, except for the narrow tip of the walking stick pointed at his nose. 

"Listen closely, because I will only tell you this once," the elder said, Ïf Mr. Saotome, Tendo, or for that matter, Ukyo learn about this arrangement Son-In-Law, and his bride, will be feasting on duck during their wedding banquet. Is this clear?" 

Mousse nodded his head.

* * *

Ryoga cradled the bag of ice against the knot in his forehead, as he reclined on the grill on his elbow. "There I was just walking along some district in southern China, when suddenly you show up and... Why in the hell did you hit me upside the head again?" 

"Trust me," Ukyo glared at him from over her shoulder as she stood at the sink, washing the lunch dishes, "You deserved it. Now stop being a baby and keep that ice on your head." Ukyo paused for a moment as she dunked another dish into the hot water, "You never did tell me what you were doing reading the classifieds." 

"Not that it's any of your business, but I'm looking for a work." 

"What type?" 

"Construction mostly. I get the best money though in Korea, they keep finding these caves they want collapsed for some reason. Maybe if I could speak the language I could figure out why." 

"You work in Korea, and you don't speak Korean?" 

"Hey, give me a break, it's one of the hand full of languages I don't speak." 

Ukyo put the dish she was rinsing on the stack to her left, and turned around to scrub the grill with her kitchen rag. "Somehow, sugar, I find that hard to believe." 

"Just because I can't find my way to high school doesn't mean that I am an idiot." 

"Then how many languages do you know?" 

"All but a hand full of Native American languages, and Korean. Very few people speak the Native American languages anymore, and no one but a native speaker could ever learn Navajo." 

Ukyo pushed her rag across the grill, pausing with her nose only a few inches from Ryoga she said, "Say something in German then." 

Ryoga looked up at Ukyo, and just for a second was caught mid breath as he looked directly into her bright, questioning eyes. His body refused to breathe. (I would tell you that your eyes look like two sapphires, but when I look into them, my body is paralyzed by your gaze). 

"And what is that supposed to mean." Ukyo laughed. 

"That your rag is burning." Ryoga said pointing at the grill. A small whiff of smoke rose between the two teenagers. Ukyo yelped more from embarrassment than fear, as she threw the rag across the kitchen and into the sink behind her. Turning on the faucet, she doused the smoldering cloth. 

"So why are you looking for a job?" 

"I'm going to propose to Akane next week." 

"You're kidding right?" Ukyo crossed her arms. "You can't stay coherent when she looks at you, and now you're going to propose? What brought this on?" 

"Akane broke off their engagement." Ukyo's face turned a bright shade of violet as she fought to regain her breath. She grabbed Ryoga's collar and pulled him across the table. 

"Ryoga I swear by all the Kami in the heavens, if you are lying to me..." 

"No, it's true... She told me three days ago. Why else would I be looking for a job to buy the ring?" 

Ukyo released the pig-boy from her death grip and pirouetted around the room. "It's over Ryoga! Now he'll move in with me, and we'll get married and there will be kids..." 

Ryoga laughed; somehow he had never imagined the cook acting so feminine before. "And you can have what you've always wanted, and I can be on my way..." 

Uc-chan stopped in mid-twirl. "Oh, leaving so soon?" 

"Well, I have the diamond, but I still need to get the ring to mount it in..." Ryoga shrugged, "and rings cost money." 

"Why don't you stay here? I could always use some help with the dishes." 

"You would do that for me?" 

Ukyo smiled, "Of course, what are friends for?" 

"Thanks, Ukyo... this means a lot." Ryoga said blushing. 

Ukyo waved the lost boy off, "You would do the same for me."

* * *

Ranma walked into the Tendo home after his second full day of work. He still could not decide whether the old Ghoul knew what he was up to and was trying to kill him, or if she was just wearing him out so that it would be easier to drag him back to China. Between dashing between tables, dodging Shampoo's random glomps (and an occasional hurled weapon from Moose), and scrubbing the restaurant after the rushes, Ranma was exhausted. But there was one more thing he had to do. 

"Yo, Akane," he said, taking off his shoes. 

"What?" Akane said from the living room. She and Nabiki sat under the table watching the late movie while her father, on the back porch, looked up at the stars. 

"Get your gui on meet me in the dojo in ten minutes." 

"Why?" 

"Because if mom and pop are going to force to keep living here, then I need to teach you how to beat the hell out of every fool prince who mistakes you for the idea housewife so that I don't have do it for you" 

Nabiki looked up from the television and raised an eyebrow. Soun turned to watch the exchange between his daughter and her fiance. 

"You mean you're going to train me?" Akane said springing to her feet. 

"That's what I said isn't it?" Ranma rolled his eyes, "Gesh, I knew your head was hard, but I think its starting to affect your hearing too. Well what are you waiting for? Get dressed." 

Akane dashed out of the living room and up the stares, to excited about the training to care about the insults. Soun looked at Ranma as the tears started to pour from his eyes. "Ranma has taken my daughter in as a student! At last the two families will be joined." 

"Don't you start any of that crap, old man. This is your entire fault you know. If you would have trained her right, I wouldn't have to do this." 

"What do you mean, trained her right?" 

"Hell, she practically comes with her own ransom note! What did you teach her? The ancient art of Tomboy?" 

"Well, I thought I taught..." 

"...her how to over extend her stances and bring her kicks in short? Sure, she's as strong as a mule, but she has the grace of a bull ox in a China factory. Hell, her form has so many holes in it that Nabiki could probably take her if a thousand yen were at stake." 

"Thanks." Nabiki said from the floor. 

Ranma ignored the middle Tendo, her failure to find him work anywhere but the Cat Cafe was still fresh in his memory. "So just shut up and leave us the hell alone and maybe I can undo some of the damage your instruction has caused," Ranma said as he stormed down the hall. 

Soun sat on the porch and looked down at his daughter in disbelief. 

"Don't look at me," she said as she tuned the channel to the stock report, "I took last year in the betting pool. Talk to Nadoka." 

Ranma stomped up to the top of the stares to be greeted by the sight of an indignant fiance. 

"I could not help but hear what you said to my father. How much of that did you mean?" 

"Only the part about me needing to train you for your safety." 

"And the rest?" 

Ranma glanced about to make sure no one was looking, gave Akane a quick peck on the cheek, "Just to keep up appearances." 

Behind them Nadoka closed the door to the guest room and smiled quietly to herself.

* * *

Moose eyed the old ghoul as she reclined in her chair. He could only guess from her impersonation of a buzz-saw that she was asleep. He slipped passed her and out the door he had watched Ranma use as he carried the afternoon trash outside. Reaching into his sleeve he selected a hooked sword, drew in a deep breath and focused his chi. "Ranma! Prepare to die." 

Ranma twisted to his right to avoid the blade only to be caught by the hook as Moose drew the blade back. "What in the hell Was that for?" He asked as he flipped back to his feet. 

"I'm not going to let you take her without a fight." 

"Take who?" Ranma asked, as his snap kick connected with the blind boy's wrist, jarring the sword from his hands. 

"Your chosen fiance, who else would I be talking about, moron," Moose pulled a toilet seat from his robe and hurled it at the pig-tailed boy. 

"Jesus, when did you start chasing Ak..." Ranma dodged the unusual projectile... "Wait how did you know about the engagement?" ...Only to be struck by the follow-up toilet. 

"I was there when you told the old ghoul." Moose said as he readied a mallet, "If you think you can get out of this by playing dumb Soatome, you've got another thing coming." 

Ranma side stepped the mallet as its downward arch intersected with the space his head had occupied only a moment before. "Hey, duck-boy, did you hear me ask Shampoo to marry her?" 

"No but..." 

"Then what makes you think that I want to marry Shampoo?" 

"But then who is the ring for?" Mouse raised the mallet again in frustration. Ranma said nothing, but made a small gesture at the mallet with his hands. "What?" Mouse looked up at the mallet in confusion, and then understood. Ranma wasn't giving the ring to Shampoo, "Oh... When did you ask?" 

"I'm going to as soon as I can get the ring." 

Mouse followed the mallet with his eyes as he eased it back down, allowing its head to rest gently against the earth, "Then what are we fighting for?" 

Ranma shrugged, "Its fun?" 

"Well, yes. But..." Mouse swallowed in apprehension as he looked back up at Ranma, "Is there anything I can do to help?"

* * *

Ukyo sat at the grill with a stack of receipts to her left as she counted the days earnings. The receipts were divided into four piles: cash, check, credit, and personal tabs, each of which was organized in its own particular way. The cash receipts were in time order, checks receipts were sorted by check number, credit card receipts by credit card type then time, and the personal tabs were alphabetized, last name first. Each stack had been counted four times, and the total had been written on the top receipt from each stack in green ink. "Why am I three yen short?" 

Ryoga looked up from his current breaking point training project, "Did you check in the register under the change till?" 

"Yes, and on the floor around the register, I can't find it anywhere, sugar." 

"Maybe you gave a few extra coins to someone during the afternoon rush." 

"For the last time, I did not give away any extra money. Its here somewhere, I just need to count the drawer again." 

"I have three yen in my pocket, do you want me to..." 

"No, it will throw off my book keeping, I'll just count again." 

"If you say so..." Ryoga picked up his project again, and struck it with a straight pin, "But could you explain to me why I have to sit here while you do it." 

"To keep you from wondering off and ending up in Russia," Ukyo said, "and to keep me from making any mistakes while I get this deposit ready." 

"I haven't helped much with that then, have I?" Ryoga smiled sheepishly. 

"True, but you haven't left for Moscow yet either," Ukyo said as she pulled out the single yen coins for the fifth time. Ryoga made a sharp movement with his hands, distracting Ukyo yet again. "Ryoga, honey, what are you doing?" she asked, grinding her teeth together. 

"Cutting Akane's diamond." 

"Cutting it?" 

"Shaping it, so that it reflects the light." 

"Can I see?" 

"Sure," Ryoga said, holding the diamond in his left hand closer to Ukyo. She watched as he took the pin that he held in his right and made a quick jab at the diamond. The pin lightly tapped the stone, and a portion of it shattered, leaving behind a perfect facet. 

"Wow," Ukyo exhaled, "When did you learn how to do that?" 

"When I learned the breaking point technique." Ryoga tapped the stone again revealing another facet. "At first when I looked at an object I could only see the objects breaking point, but the longer I looked the more I began to see... nothing its stupid really." 

"What did you see, please tell me..." 

"Look I know it sounds silly, but sometimes, an object will show me what it really looks like... underneath the extra material that it was buried in, and all the breaking points inside of it that will eliminate the extra material around it." 

"You're right, that does sound silly," Ukyo stuck out her tongue at the bandana wearing martial artist. 

"I told you so," Ryoga shrugged. 

"So what does that diamond want to look like?" Ukyo asked. 

"Well, I'm not sure," Ryoga placed the stone down on the counter and just looked at it for a second. "Its still a bit fuzzy, but I think that its two strait lines with a curved top and a line going through it. So it should look like a Romanized A. But like I said, I'm not sure." 

Ukyo looked up at Ryoga and laughed. 

"What? What did I do this time?" 

"Nothing. You didn't do anything." Ukyo stifled another giggle, "It's just... you usually have such a hard time talking to Akane..." 

"Akane is a girl," Ryoga shrugged her shoulders. 

"And I'm not?" 

"Well no, I wouldn't say you were exactly a girl." 

"Oh, then what would you say that I am?" Ukyo stopped counting coins. 

"You are just a friend, you're not a girl." 

Ukyo rolled her eyes, "Well what about Konastu?" 

"Konastu is a guy." 

"You have a point with that one." Ukyo started counting coins again. "Wait, I have an idea, why don't you practice on me and Konastu, that way you can practice for Akane." 

Ryoga stopped cutting the diamond. "Do you think it will work?" 

"Its bound to, after all it was my idea." Ukyo finished counting the coins again, this time coming up with the correct number, "Yatta! I found the three yen." 

Ryoga rolled his eyes.

* * *

Nabiki opened the front door as the doorbell rang for the fifth time. "May I help..." 

"Hello," A twenty-something man said as he pushed his way into the furrow, "You must be Nabiki Tendo, I recognize your photograph from the application you have on file at the school." 

Änd you are?" 

"Senshi Kousa, I am with the admissions office at Tokyo University, and I am here to tell you all about the wonderful opportunities which await you when you enroll for classes next..." 

Nabiki held up a finger and touched it to the admissions councilor's lips, Änd you're here at the request of..." 

"Your father of course," he said cheerfully, "Now let me tell you all about the department of business, and managerial studies..."

* * *

Akane stood in the center of the dojo, the pants of her gui popped as she snapped her foot in a high side kick. 

"Again." Ranma said, "Only this time don't bring swing your foot back down when you kick. Leave you foot fully extended and push your opponent further away with your chi." 

The short haired girl said nothing. She just kicked, following her instructor's commands. 

"Again. Better, only you're bending your knee on your plant leg." 

Akane, kicked. 

"Again, now don't lean back." 

The girl kicked again. 

"Stop. That's enough for today; tomorrow we'll work on the hole in your punch." 

"Yes, sir." Akane bowed at Ranma, her face in a small frown. 

"Hey, Ak-chan," Ranma asked, bowing his head to meet her eyes, "What's the matter?" 

"Its nothing," a drop of sweat rolled off of her nose, and onto the floor at her feet. "I just thought that I would do better than this." 

"Really?" Ranma smiled, "And how long has it been since your father last taught you anything?" 

"Four years." 

"You're just a little rusty, that's all. To tell the truth, you're doing better than I thought you would." 

Akane glared at him, "Thanks." 

"No, seriously, from the way that your father moves I thought that I would have to make you start all over and completely re-teach you so that you could learn my school. As it is I think once we correct a few of your bad habits, you will be ready to learn some more advanced moves." 

"Like the chestnuts attack?" 

"I'm not so sure about that one, it doesn't fit your style. I thought you would be better off learning some techniques that were more in line with your personality." 

"Oh, which ones then?" 

"Some of the Phoenix tribe attacks for starters... Your personality seems to be more attuned to fire than ice." 

"What makes you say that?" 

"Your temper." 

Akane's side kick caught Ranma in the chest, sending him flying into a wall. Realizing what she had done, the short haired girl ran to her fiance and cradled him in her arms. "Oh my god. Oh my god. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Ranma are you alright." 

"See, when you don't bend your back leg it makes the kick more powerful." 

Akane looked the pig-tailed-boy in the eyes and laughed.

* * *

Cologne straddled her staff and hopped out from behind the counter, "Hey, son-in-law!" 

"Yeah, old Ghoul?" 

"I have another errand I need to run at the embassy. Finish wiping down that table, and then take a break before the dinner crowd begins arriving." Ranma let out a sigh, "Oh, and make sure you tell my grand-daughter and Mr. Good-for-Nothing that I will be back before five." The pig-tailed martial-artist nodded his head as the elder hopped by, cracking his skull with the knob of her staff mid-jump, "And show some respect for your elders." 

He gritted his teeth as the Elder hopped out of the restaurant. One day he was going to figure out the trick she used to keep herself balanced on that damned staff, and then... well, he would think of something. But now it was time to relax before the nights rush. The Pig-tailed boy wrung out his rag in the pail on the floor, and carried it past the kitchen, out the back. Slinging the pail back with one hand he braced its bottom with the other and slung the water across the back lot, only to be startled by several stars as they slammed onto the side of the restaurant door. 

"Sorry, Arien, Shampoo make this quick. Arien no get hurt." Shampoo dropped back into a low stance, barely avoiding the swipe of Mouse's halberd blade. Bending her front knee, she shifted her weight to the front, and brought her fist crashing into the blind boy's jaw. 

Mouse recoiled from the blow, but recovered to catch the haft of the pole-arm on the Amazon's shirt just above her shoulder, pinning the girl against the restaurant wall. "Shampoo, my love, the victory is mine." 

"How many time must Shampoo tell Mouse? Shampoo, no need Duck boy. Shampoo have Arien." Shampoo grabbed the haft of the halberd and twisted, throwing the unsuspecting boy across the yard into the brick fence. Shampoo turned away from the Chinese boy, her face a blank mask. "Moose go home. Shampoo no want see get hurt" 

Ranma looked closely at the girls face, he wasn't quite sure but for a moment he swore he saw a trace of sadness in the girl's eyes. She glanced up at him and the moment was over, a smile returning to her lips, "Yo, Shampoo, the old witch asked me to tell you she stepped out for a while. She said something about going to the embassy." 

"Go to give Arien and Shampoo time alone, no?" Shampoo smiled, "Come up with Shampoo to Shampoo's room. See where room be when you stay here for good." 

Ranma took a step back and but his hands up to keep the girl at bay, "That's ok, how about later?" 

"Ok, Ranma loss." The Amazon walked past Ranma, making sure that her hips popped with each step she took as she went back through the kitchen. Ranma waited till the door closed behind her and then walked over to Mouse. 

"So if you want her, why don't you fight her all out?" 

"I don't know what you are talking about," the blind boy said, as he pulled himself to his feet. 

"I've fought both of you. You're better than that. You intentionally lowered your right arm 3cm so that she could get the leverage she needed to throw you. Don't deny it either, I watched you do it. Why? You win and its over, she's yours." 

Mouse walked past Ranma, "You wouldn't understand."

* * *

Nabiki, pushed open the gate to the Kuno mansion and walked into the front garden. Satsuke met her half way, bowing in respect. "Ms. Tendou, what a privilege to see you here today, unannounced... To what do we owe this honor? But I regret to inform you that young master..." 

"I have business, with Kuno-baby." Nabiki raised an eyebrow, "He will see me. Now." 

"Yes, Ms. Tendou." Satsuke bowed, and then disappeared into the shadows of the Kuno estate. 

The Mercenary-girl cradled an envelope in her crossed arms, as she looked about the estate with a new found respect. There were many scams and schemes that she had concocted in her short eighteen years, but the one she was looking at now... And to think no one had ever bothered to check. Yet, knowing what her research had uncovered, everything about the Kuno family suddenly made perfect since. It was almost enough to make her laugh. 

"Hello, Tendo Nabiki," Kuno walked out of the estate and into the garden, "to what do I owe the pleasantries of this visit?" 

"Enough flattery Kuno-baby, I'm here on business." 

"From you I would expect as much." 

Nabiki flinched, the words hurt. She was not sure why, but they hurt. 

"So what can I do for you?" Kuno said, turning his back to her. 

"You can start by leaving by sister and the 'Pig-tailed-goddess' alone. Burn the pictures. Destroy the shrine. Stop drooling over them. Find new objects for your affections." 

"Abandon my true loves?" Kuno laughed, "Or else what?" 

"Or else it would be a shame if someone at Emperor's palace were to learn of the contents of this envelope." Nabiki handed the small package to the would-be samurai. "I understand that crimes of this sort still carry a large penalty... even today." 

Kuno took the envelope, and opened it, scanning the contents. "Satsuke." 

"Yes, young master?" 

"Gather up all of the photos of Tendo Akane, and the Pig-Tailed-Goddess." 

"Yes, Master Kuno." 

"Sutsuke, make sure that you include the photo's in the shrine as well." 

"Yes, sir." 

"This is low, even for one such as you Nabiki." Kuno turned to face his classmate, "I count the days till I am rid of you." 

"Then good news, Kuno-baby." She said as she walked towards the gate, "Come the end of the summer you won't be seeing me anymore." 

"Oh, why not?" 

"I'm going away for school... in America." 

"Oh," Kuno turned toward the gate, "Where at?" 

"Harvard. Its one of the best schools in the world to study business." 

"Funny, I've never heard of it." Kuno said as she closed the gate. 

"Master Kuno," Satsuke said, as he dropped from a tree to the would-be samurai's right, "I have gathered the pictures as you ordered, would you still have me to destroy them?" 

"If you would please," Kuno said as he walked back inside of the estate. 

"Master," the servant looked up at his lord in fear, "what was in the envelope that would require you to do such a thing?" 

Kuno looked back at Satsuke and smiled, "I do not know, I never read the contents."

* * *

Cologne stood behind the desk as the chief diplomat fidgeted behind his desk. It was common knowledge that the elders of the tribes of the Jusinkio area were exempt from all laws. You could not force one to do anything that she did not want to do of her own free will, and here hundreds of miles away, in Japan he was face to face with a very irate Elder. What had he ever done to anger the ancestors? 

(What do you mean there has been no word from the region?) Cologne asked, leaning across the desk. 

The diplomat squirmed in his chair as he wondered how a woman so short could manage to look down her nose at him, (I've talked with the officials in Beijing and there has been no word from the district in over a month. No official word has been able to leave the region, and all agents which have departed for the area have yet to return.) 

The elder sighed, (What word has the Party received unofficially?) 

(Unofficially we hear of rebelion. But from whom we are not sure. You understand our hesitance to enter the region in force without the support of your tribe.) 

The elder nodded, if united, the three tribes would be more than a match for any army. (Then what do we do from here?) 

(I am not sure, but when the party learns anything new, you will be the first to know, I promise.) 

(Thank you,) Cologne said as she stood up to leave.

* * *

Akane sat up in her bed as she heard her name screamed through the wall. Today had been rough on everyone, especially Nabiki who had come home from her errands cursing and screaming. Kasumi had tried to lighten the middle sister's temperament, but that had resulted in the normally collected mercenary throwing a skillet through a window. As a result, everyone in the house just kept their distance while she stalked the halls, pacing and muttering to herself. It was almost as if Nabiki had computed the family's taxes only to find that they owed money. Now Ranma was having the nightmare again. She couldn't understand why he would not just tell her what the dream was about... It obviously involved her. She hated to hear him suffer like this. It hurt. She had to do something, but what? 

Sliding out of the bed, the short haired girl slid into her slippers, and slinked across her room. Peering out the door she watched as a Panda holding a pillow shut the door to the guest room, and walked down the stairs. A light turned on. "He actually managed to wake you up?" Nadoka said from down stairs. 

"Mowr," replied the Panda. 

The light turned back off. Akane crept across the hall and opened the door. Ranma lay in his futon, tossing in his sleep. 

"No, I won't let you kill her again." 

Akane paused for a moment, puzzled. 'Again', what did he mean 'again?' She sat down next to the boy, and listened. 

"To, hot. Akane drying out. Dehydrated. Need water. Water gone." Ranma shifted in his sleep, and wrapped his arms around the tomboy. His arms were firm, yet tense as the pig-tailed boy shook with fear. "No water. Akane don't leave." 

"Its ok," the girl said, as she stroked his hair, petting him the same way that she did when he was in the neko-ken. 

"No, I can't loose her." 

"I'm here, its ok." Akane said. Ranma's shaking grew more violent as he held her in his sleep. She had to do something, or the nightmare would wake him again, and he would not be able to get back to sleep before his shift at the cafe in the morning. Cologne was working him to death, and if he didn't get sleep soon... 

Thinking back to her own nightmares, she searched her memories for anything that could help. She remembered the song her mother sang to her as a child. Pulling her love close to her breast, she leaned forward. It would not hurt to try. 

Hitotsume no kotoba wa yume  
nemuri no naka kara  
mune no oku no kurayami wo sotto  
tsuredasu no

futatsume no kotoba wa kaze  
yukute wo oshiete  
kamisama no ude no naka e  
tsubasa wo aoru no

tokete itta kanashii koto wo  
kazoeru you ni  
kiniro no ringo ga  
mata hitotsu ochiru  
mita koto mo nai fuukei  
soko ga kaeru basho

tatta hitotsu no inochi ni  
tadoritsuku basho  
furui mahou no hon  
tsuki no shizuku yoru no tobari  
itsuka aeru yokan dake

we can fly  
we have wings  
we can touch floating dreams  
call me from so far  
through the wind  
in the light

mittsume no kotoba wa hum...  
mimi wo sumashitara  
anata no furueru ude wo  
sotto tokihanatsu 

Finishing the song, Akane closed her eyes, and cradled her head on his shoulder. Slumber found her, as Ranma stopped shaking and settled down. The two lovers slumbered in silent peace. 


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

"But I know in my heart of heart of hearts  
I know I'm never gonna hold you again  
Now I, I wish it would rain down, down on me"  
-Phil Collins, "I wish it would rain down."

Ranma looked out the window as silver clouds obscured the morning sky. It was a false dawn. The sun had yet to rise, which meant that both of the families were still asleep. The pig-tailed boy had been awake for almost twenty minutes now. He dared not breathe out of fear that the short-haired girl would wake up.

She looked so peaceful lying there in her sleep. Her arms and legs were intertwined around him as they formed a lovers knot. He smiled. Only she could make yellow pajamas with black pigs look sensuous.

"Akane," he said as he kissed her forehead, "Time to get you back."

The short haired girl stretched and smiled, "How did you sleep?"

"Like a baby."

Akane sighed. One of those would be nice. But not till later, much later. "Well, good. Between Cologne and your nightmares I was worried that you were running yourself ragged."

Ranma stood up and offered Akane his hand, "Let's get you back, before anyone else wakes up."

"Do I have to? Can't we just sleep in?"

"Do you want your father calling a minister tonight?"

The thought was tempting. They were getting married anyhow. But if it looked as though their parents had railroaded them into a wedding then neither Shampoo nor Ukyo would accept the outcome. There would be a repeat of the last ceremony for sure. Akane sighed, "I guess it can't last forever." She stood up and allowed Ranma to pull her into his arms as he carried Akane to the window.

"Can't we take the door?"

"It would wake Kasume." Ranma jumped, landing softly on the grass next to the pond. It was only a half-truth. He could sneak Akane back to her room fairly easily. This method required him to carry her in his arms. It was an added benefit.

"One day you are going to have to show me how to do this."

"That lesson starts next week."

"Oh," she said as he leapt towards her window. He landed on the ledge and leaned forward, his momentum coming to a rest as he lighted on her desk.

"I'll be in early tonight."

"Cologne let you off?"

"No," he gave her the self-sure smile, "Today's my last day."

"You have enough?"

"For a small one," Ranma said.

"It only took three weeks," she sighed, "I guess this means that we have to tell our parents?"

"Tomorrow."

"Tomorrow. But when we do, you have to bring it up," Akane said. That is when the mayhem would really start. She reached up and kissed her soon-to-be fiance. "I'll see you tonight. I love you."

"I love you too. I need to go in early today, to help the old ghoul get things ready for lunch." Ranma said as he jumped down from her window again.

"Remember don't eat anything she cooks for you." Aknae called as her gaze followed the pig-tailed boy out of the window. The morning mist descended on the garden as her fiance's hair changed from brown to red. Ranma-chan looked up and smiled at the short-haired girl as she leaped over the garden wall. Akane watched her disappear from sight, letting her body flop to her bed when she could see her fiance no longer. Holding her left hand in front of her face she smiled as she lightly stroked her ring finger. Tonight it would hold a diamond ring. "I'm getting married... I'm getting married..." she chanted.

* * *

Konastu held Ryoga's hand as the two of them walked to the jeweler's. He still was not quite sure as to what he should think about this situation. Ryoga had moved into the restaurant at Ukyo-sama's request three weeks ago. This was something he did not approve of. During this time Ryoga and he were sharing a room. The male ninja did not like this either. She and Ryoga had become all but inseparable. The male ninja could not tolerate that. 

But, the closeness was due to the fanged boy's inaptitude for direction. If either Ukyo-sama or he did not keep a close eye on the lost-boy, he would wonder off somewhere and not be seen for days. And if he wondered off he wouldn't be able to ask his mystery girl to marry him... And if Ryoga never asked her he would never leave... And then the lost-boy and Ukyo-sama would continue to get closer... And the gender-confused ninja definitely would not tolerate that.

"Konastu, I realize that you are a guy and don't think of other guys that way," Ryoga said, "But do you have to hold my hand so tight."

Every pedestrian within earshot of the two stopped and looked at the couple. Both boys blushed bright red and smiled. Konastu giggled, hiked up the helm of his kimono and dashed around the corner, dragging the pig-boy with him. "Yes, it is necessary," he said, "Ukyo-sama said the next time I had to go look for you she would dock my time off from my pay." He thought he had been rid of Ryoga. How was the 'waitress' to know that his boss would make him go look for the wandering idiot?

Ryoga looked down at his feet, "Sorry, how should I have known the bus was headed to Kyoto?"

"That's what they make bus schedules for. Let's just get this over with. The sooner you get this ring the sooner you can be out of Ukyo-sama's hair."

Ryoga nodded. The sooner he got the ring the sooner he could leave.

"So, when are you going to ask her?"

"Ask her what?"

Konastu gritted his teeth, "To marry you."

"Oh, I wasn't sure. I thought I would wait for the right time."

Konastu paused for a second. That was unacceptable, Ukyo-sama would probably insist that the bumbling idiot stay and continue their 'practice' dates, while the gender-confused coached him on what women liked. He had to leave tonight... and that might not be soon enough. "Why don't you ask her tonight?"

Ryoga paused and looked up at the sky.

Ryoga would drop down on one knee in the garden behind the Tendo home as the rain poured down. Holding in his Umbrella in his left hand he would pull out the ring with his right. "Akane Tendo, marry me and I will make you so happy you forget about Ranma."

"Ranma who?" Akane would reply as she would throw her arms around his neck.

"Oh, my dearest Akane, you have made me the happiest man alive." Ryoga would say.

"Oh, Ryoga," his fiance would say as she moved in to kiss him. Ryoga would look back down at Ukyo and...

Ryoga trembled. How did Ukyo get in that daydream?

"Are you Ok?" Konastu asked as he opened the door to the jewelry shop.

"Yeah," he said, "Just a scary thought."

The gender-confused ninja shrugged his shoulders as he followed the lost boy into the jeweler's. Boys were strange.

* * *

Ranma walked up to the old Ghoul while she lay on the counter smoking her pipe. "Hey, old Ghoul, do you have my pay for this week?" 

The Amazon elder cocked an eyebrow, "Its Friday isn't it? What has you so worked up Son-in-Law?"

Ranma gritted his teeth. She knew damn well why he was asking for the money. "I need to go shopping."

Cologne smiled, "Oh, what for?" The elder poked the pig-tailed-boy's chest, "I know you don't need to go shopping. You're always wearing the same shirt. Although I guess you could use a few braziers, living with Happy and all."

Ranma shivered, "Come on old Ghoul. I need to get to the merchant's district before the jeweler's closes. Please."

The elder paused. She had never heard him use that word before outside of the Soatome secret technique. It was a shame that her great-granddaughter had to let that one slip through her fingers. But then her granddaughter had lost before she ever knew she wanted to compete. That Tendo girl was something, a proud Amazon that one would be. "Here, here is your money, along with an advance for next week. Consider it an engagement present from me."

Ranma took the envelope that the elder held out to him. "Thank you; I don't know what to say."

Cologne smiled at the boy. For a moment the pig-tailed martial artist could have sworn that her aura reflected deep sorrow. "With as much as you have done for my tribe in the past, and will do in the future, it's the least I could do. Now go, just remember that your intended won't get off work until after the cafe closes." Ranma smiled, the old Ghoul still did not suspect anything. "And no proposing during the dinner rush, Shampoo won't earn any tips tonight if all the boys know her fiance is in the cafe."

The boy stifled a laugh, that wouldn't be a problem. Cologne watched the boy leave the restaurant; it had been fun playing with him the past few weeks. She sighed. Now it was over, and the boredom would set in again.

"Shampoo, so happy. Tonight have ring," the young Amazon pirouetted around the room. "Tomorrow have Ranma. Next week China."

The elder laughed to her-self. But maybe there was a bit of entertainment left to milk out of all of this. Mouse, however, frowned. Tonight would not be easy.

* * *

Kuno sulked as he strolled through the estate garden. He could not stand the bare walls of his room, it was bizarre. There should be photos everywhere of his true loves: pictures of the athletic and lithe Tendo Akane, photos of the buxom and divine pig-tailed-goddess. But he could share in their true love no more. Tendo Nabiki had seen to that with her blackmail, threatening to expose his family's darkest secret. But then, if it was the loss of his true loves which was troubling. It was his thoughts. If ideas were pathways and thoughts were meadows, then the young master did not care for the direction that his mind was meandering towards without the distracting presence of the two lusty girls. 

"Young Master," Sasuke asked, "What was in that envelope has you fretting so?"

"I told you Sasuke, I never read the contents."

Sasuke laughed, "I shall take your word for it then. I will pry no further."

"Harvard," Kuno said.

The Ninja smiled, "And why does this worry you so? The seer's prophesy perhaps?"

"I thought I forbid you to mention any word of that charlatan or his foolery in my presence."

"My apologies master, if there is nothing that I can do to help, allow me to take my leave." Sasuke turned toward the shadows to disappear.

"Wait." The urgency in Kuno's voice pulled the Ninja back. "Do you think that she was telling the truth? Is she really leaving?"

Sasuke bowed to hide his smile. His charges were easy to read. "I could find out for you, Young master, if you so desire?"

"I do." Kuno said, as he turned to examine a lily blossom. "And Sasuke?"

"Yes Master Kuno?"

"If she has accepted the offer of the American school, take whatever measures you deem appropriate."

"Yes Master Kuno."

* * *

Ryoga walked into the Uchan's, "I got it." 

Ukyo jumped across the grill, "Let me see, let me see."

Konastu rolled his eyes. Ryoga dug into his pockets and pulled out a Tiffany blue box. He eased open the cover and revealed an intricately carved band. "Ryoga, its beautiful. God, I hope Ranma gets me one like this."

"Well, Konastu said this was the one I should get," Ryoga blushed.

"Konastu?"

"I told him that with a ring like that there was no way the girl could say no. Did we do a good job?"

Ukyo hugged the pseudo-girl, "Oh, Konastu, you did wonderful."

Konastu blushed. "I well... I... um..."

Ukyo stood up, "Ryoga, you should ask her tonight. It would be perfect."

The gender confused ninja nodded enthusiastically the faster Ryoga asked the quicker he would leave, "Yes. The sooner the better."

"But isn't it supposed to rain tonight?"

"Ryoga," Konastu said, "Don't you know anything? Rain is romantic. If you ask her tonight she won't be able to resist the romantic atmosphere."

"Are you sure?" Ryoga closed the box. "I don't think tonight would be..."

"Konastu is right" Ukyo nodded, "If you ask her tonight there is no way she could say no."

"But what about the rain?"

The kunoichi sighed in frustration at this rate he would never get him to leave, "Come on. Why not use that umbrella that you are always carrying around."

Ryoga looked down at the blue box. If he were to become wet, everything would be ruined tonight. But if he pulled it off, there was no way that Akane could say no.

"Oh, Ryoga," Akane would say as they sat around their dining room table, "Remember when you asked me to marry you?"

"Yes, dear how could I forget?" he would reply as he ate her wonderful cooking.

"I don't think I would have agreed to marry you if it had not have been for the rain."

"I'll do it." Ryoga said.

* * *

Ranma looked back at the store window one last time as he twirled a burgundy box with his right hand, unaware of the pair of eyes that had been stalking him for several hours now. 

"Oh, Ranma-sama," Kodachi said as she bounded into his arms, "You should not have."

"I didn't."

"No, not another word, my love. The ring you hold in your hand tells me all that I need to know."

"Then you know?" Ranma scratched his head in confusion.

"Well yes, and though it is a small, cheep thing..."

"Cheep, I'll have you know I..." Ranma said, doing his best to control his anger.

"It's the thought that counts, and I will treasure it when you place it on my hand."

"Give it to you?" the pig-tailed boy stuttered, "Kodachi..."

"Not now, my love," the gymnast blushed bright burgundy matching the box the boy bared. "Wait till tonight when the moon is full and the mood is perfect."

"What?"

"Then I can introduce you to father, and we can ask his blessing since Tachi has already granted us his." Kodachi leaned in and kissed the young martial artist on the cheek as he paused at the storefront in his confusion.

"But I don't want your father's..."

"Then we elope? How romantic. I'll do it for you, Ranma-sama," Ranma opened his mouth in protest, but Kodachi placed a finger on his lips to silence him, "Until tonight my love, good-bye."

A cloud of pollen and black rose petals filled the marketplace, blinding the boy momentarily. When his burning eyes finally refocused the girl was gone, leaving behind a very confused martial-artist. "I can't wait till this is over."

* * *

Nadoka and Kasumi sat in the kitchen sipping tea as Nabiki stormed in, tearing open the cabinets searching randomly for something. 

"Nabiki, dear, what are you looking for," Nadoka asked.

"Arsenic... Rat Poisson... Something sharp I can run through the old man's belly."

Kasumi raised an eyebrow, "Oh, father or grandfather Happosi?"

Nabiki glowered at the two women sitting at the kitchen table.

"What happened?" Auntie asked.

"I was out at the Market, checking on some investments and collecting on some loans when this man in a red jacket came out of nowhere and asked my name was Nabiki Tendo."

"That's nice," Kasumi took another sip of tea.

"And then there were twenty men. In red suits. Singing. They followed me around all day."

"That sounds romantic," Nodoka rolled her eyes, "Why are you complaining?"

"They were the Tokyo University Glee Club. And they were singing the school fight song. I don't know how he did it. But if this doesn't end soon the old man is going to pay." Nabiki stormed out of the kitchen. Stomped up the stairs and slammed her bedroom door.

Nadoka and Kasumi giggled over the rims of their teacups.

* * *

Mouse stood in the door of the cat cafe, while Shampoo scowled at him. "Duck Boy, get out my way." 

"Shampoo, you really don't want to go to the dojo tonight."

"You know nothing. Ramna choose Shampoo."

"Then maybe you should wait for him to bring the ring to you." Cologne suggested from behind the counter.

"No, grandmother, Shampoo want Kitchen-destroyer to know Ramna belong to Shampoo. Shampoo want to see look on her face when Ramna give Shampoo ring."

"But Shampoo..."

"Mouse, step aside," Cologne said, she looked away from her great-great-granddaughter. "Let her go, there is nothing you can do."

Mouse lowered his head in defeat and stepped aside.

"Thank you great-grandmother." Shampoo pushed passed Mouse and bounded off into the night. The blind-boy watched her as she disappeared over the roof of the building adjacent to the cafe.

"We both know what she will learn tonight at the dojo." The elder placed a hand on the male Amazon's shoulder. "When the time comes stop her before she does something she will regret."

Mouse nodded, and followed the pink-haired girl into the night.

* * *

"Ryoga, are you ready yet?" Ukyo called from the bottom of the stares. 

"Yes, I'm coming. Konastu, where did you say the stairs were again?"

"They're right behind you," Konastu's voice called from upstairs. "No, that's our room Ryoga-sama. No..." Someone sighed. " For Christ's sake, here."

Ryoga rolled down the stares, coming to a stop at Ukyo's feet. "Danmit you didn't have to push me," Ryoga yelled towards the top of the stairs.

"Just trying to help Ryoga-sama." Konastu called back sweetly.

Ukyo giggled, Ryoga was cute when he was angry. It was probably the way his fangs stood out when he yelled. Somehow it reminded her of a growling puppy. "Get your Umbrella, silly. We need to go before the rain gets any heavier."

"Yes, ma'am," Ryoga said as he stood up.

"And don't forget the ring." Ukyo said as she stood at the restaurant door.

"Yes, ma'am."

* * *

Kodachi sat at the manor entryway. Her wedding Kimono was getting uncomfortable. Where was Ranma-sama? Had he forgotten her? Surely not. No one could forget her. Not with her feminine charms. He had just been delayed. 

Outside the rain was coming down harder. Maybe something had happened to him. She should go look, after all it wouldn't do to have her soon to be fiance injured on the day of their engagement day.

"Sasuke," Kodachi called, "Bring my umbrella."

"Yes my lady," Susaku said, appearing from the ceiling. "May I ask where you are going on such a night?"

"To fetch my fiance." She said as she opened the umbrella, and stepped outside.

* * *

Akane was surprised by the light rap at her bedroom window. The rain was coming down in sheets, and the idea that anyone would be outside, especially on a night like tonight was surprising. She looked up, to be greatted by the sight of a very cold, wet Ramna. "Are you ok?" she asked as she pushed the window open. 

"I'm fine," the red-headed girl shivered uncontrollably as she stepped inside her fiance's room, "Do you have any hot water."

"That depends," Akane stood at the window, her arms crossed in front of her. "Why do you smell like roses?"

"It happened when Kodachi kissed me," Ramna laughed nervously.

"When she did what?" Akane began to glow light red. "She better have been using a paralysis powder."

"She was using something alright."

Akane punched the pig-tailed boy in the stomach.

"Ouch." The young martial artist gasped.

The tomboy smiled, "That was for letting her kiss you." She reached down and pecked her fiance on the cheek. "If it had been Ukyo or Shampoo I would have used the mallet."

"I'll keep that in mind," Ramna said as the short-haired girl emptied the contents of a kettle on his head.

"So what's the matter?"

"Nothing."

"Bull, you don't use the window unless something is wrong."

"Well there is that entire fear of death thing." Akane elbowed her fiance lightly in the ribs.

"Then why are you here."

"Well, I kind of wanted to give you this." Ramna pulled a small burgundy box out of his pocket.

"Give me wha..."

"I got the money to day. It's not very big but..." Akane raised her hand to her face in astonishment. "I ain't very good with words, and I tend to put my foot in my mouth a lot, but will you?"

Akane tackled the boy, knocking the ring box out of his hands. She snatched it off the floor, and slid it on her finger. "I got my ring... I got my ring..." she half chanted.

"Was that a yes?"

"Of course silly." She smiled and hugged him again.

"I guess this means that we have to tell our families," Ramna said.

"It can wait till morning," Akane said as she snuggled her fiance's chest.

* * *

Outside Akane's window five teenagers stood holding umbrellas, they had heard everything. Kodachi was hyperventilating. Ukyo was trying to fight back the tears. Ryoga had never felt so numb. Shampoo shook with rage. "Shampoo, kill." 

"Shampoo, stop. Its over." Mouse said.

"It never over. Ranma mine."

"Shampoo."

"Duck-boy, get out of Shampoo's..." Shampoo dropped her umbrella as she lost conscious, transforming into kitten. Behind her the Amazon elder perched on her cane.

"Old ghoul you..." Mouse begain.

"Hit her sleep point while you had her preoccupied," the elder said, "You did well, Mr. Part-timer. The distraction kept me from having to injure her."

"What now?" Moose asked.

"Pick her up, Moose, its time to go home. That goes for the rest of you to. There is nothing more to be done here." Cologne said as she tuned to leave.

Mouse scooped the sleeping kitten into his arms and followed the elder. Ryoga watched the Amazons leave. He hurt. But for some reason his thoughts kept turning to the chief standing next to him. "Ukyo, are you ok?"

The chief sobbed.

"Ukyo, lets go home." Ryoga put his arm around the crying girl and pulled her away, leaving Kodachi alone in the cold wet. Tears mingled with the raindrops, as the girl fell to her knees.

"Ramna-sama, why?"


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I don't own it. It ain't mine. Don't sue me, I already owe to much money as it is.

Chapter 5

"I told you everything opened up and let you in  
You made me feel alright for once in my life  
Now all that's left of me is what I pretend to be  
So together, but so broken up inside  
'Cause I can't breathe  
No, I can't sleep  
I'm barely hangin' on"  
-Kelly Clarkson, "Behind These Hazel Eyes" 

The entry bell to Uc-chan's dinged as Konastu turned from the night's dishes to welcome the customer, "Welcome to Uc-chan's may I help..."

Ukyo scrambled behind the grill, past the kunochi, up the stairs and slammed her door.

"What happened?" the gender confused boy asked.

"The worst thing possible," Ryoga said. His body and mind was numb.

"She said no?"

"Worse, she said: yes..."' the pig-boy exhaled. Talking about the conversation they had the misfortune to overhear caused the heavy chi to swirl about him. "just, not to me."

"Then she is getting married to..."

"Ranma," Ryoga finished. "Konastu, I'm tired could you take me up to the room. I want to sleep."

"Sure," Konastu placed Ryoga's hand on his shoulder. "Ryoga, shall I help you pack for your return trip home?"

"I'm not leaving yet." Ryoga said as they started up the stairs.

"But I thought you would be leaving after you received your answer from Akane."

"I am... I mean I was... I don't know." Ryoga sputtered. "I don't want to leave until I know that Ukyo is going to be alright.

The kunochi frowned, "But..."

Ryoga walked into their shared room, "Look Konastu," he said, looking over his shoulder at the boy, "I know this is a bit of an inconvenience but I just can't leave a friend."

"I understand."

Ryoga nodded his head, sat down on the bed and watched as Konastu walked towards Ukyo's room. He lay on his back and looked up at the ceiling. He was exhausted, but he couldn't rest. His mind kept wondering back to Ukyo, and the heartbreak on her face, as she heard Ranma propose to Akane.

* * *

Cologne and Mousse looked up at the ceiling as glass shattered upstairs. Muffled screaming seeped down to the ground floor. "Shampoo is awake," Cologne said. 

The blind boy shuffled nervously in his chair as he looked down at his tea, "Do you think she's going to try to stop it?"

"Yes, against all better judgment." Cologne frowned. "Are you going to help her this time?"

"I... I don't know."

Cologne raised an eyebrow.

"I have made a promise, but..."

"You love her?"

Mousse nodded his head. "What about you, old Ghoul?"

"Not this time, Mr. Part-timer. The council has made alternate arrangements. I will not interfere."

The blind boy looked up at the elder, clearly confused. Cologne patted the boy on the back and hopped back to the kitchen laughing.

* * *

Konastu fidgeted back and forth as he rapped on Ukyo's door. She was upset and needed to talk to someone. 

"Go away," the girl's voice said.

"Ukyo, its me," the kunochi replied, "would you like to talk?"

"No."

"I know you hurt now, but things will get better I promise." Konastu listened closely at the door. He could hear Ukyo sniffle. "It hurts when you love someone who will not return your feelings." Especially when the one that you love is in love with Ranma. He could never say that of course. Not now, it was too soon. But it allowed him empathy, and that was something. "I understand how you feel."

"You understand how I feel?" The voice on the other side of the door had a feral tone, causing the gender confused boy to distance himself from the door.

"You know how in the hell I feel?" Ukyo continued as she flung open the door. "When he left me the first time, I threw away my childhood, my life and my femininity in pursuit of revenge. I trained day and night. I fought against the cold ocean. Trained in the snow, rain and sometimes hail, with only my hatred for Ranma to keep me warm. All for Ranma.

"Then, ten years later, when I find him, do you know what I did to him?" she asked

"Nothing." Konastu said, as he looked at the floor. He knew the story by heart

"I did nothing. Because he looked up at me with those blue eyes, and he told me that I was his cute fiance. All of those years training. All of that hatred I had saved up. All that I had left in my life, and I sacrificed it again for him. Sacrificed everything in my life... again. Because of that dammed smile."

"I've bit my tongue around that witch he's getting married to. I've plotted. I've schemed. I've lied. I've been the best friend he's ever had." Ukyo shook with rage at her waitress, "I've given him everything I am. And what did it get me? Nothing." Ukyo grabbed a vase from her night stand and threw it at the door. It shattered. Shrapnel sliced the gender confused boy's face as he stood in shock. "So don't you stand there and tell me that you fucking understand." Ukyo raised a fist to the kunochi.

"Ukyo, stop." Ryoga said as he grabbed her arm breaking her swing. "I'm not going to let you hurt Konastu."

"Don't start Ryoga, you don't know how this feels." the spatula girl pushed the pig boy. He didn't budge.

"He chose someone else." Ryoga pushed her on to her tail and back into her room. "Get over it."

"You don't understand." Ukyo cried, "He was supposed to choose me."

"What made you think that?" Ryoga pushed her again. The cook, tripped and lost her footing. Loosing her balance the girl stumbled backwards and fell through the second story window. Ukyo tucked her head behind her in a flip to regain her balance and landed on her feet in the alley below.

"Because I was the cute one, damn it," Ukyo looked up at the lost boy from the pavement. Ryoga leapt down from the window, and landed next to the hazel-eyed girl. She looked up at him with broken eyes and cried, "He told me I was the cute one..."

"I know." Ryoga wrapped his arms around her and held her. Her chi was heavy. Almost as heavy as his own. As they stood there, their chi swirled around, intermingling. The boy looked down at Ukyo, gently brushed the hair from her eyes and then turned to the heavens.

"Lion's Roar Attack," he yelled as a column of chi erupted from the pair, shot up into the sky and then fell back to the earth. The couple stood in the middle of the explosion unharmed, their desire to end their lives keeping them safe.

Ukyo looked up at Ryoga and smiled before loosing consciousness. The lost boy was so warm. Somehow, his warmth crept from his body and into hers. Their hearts tingled.

Konastu watched as she collapsed in the lost-boy's arms, and frowned. This was not good at all. He would have to put an end to this once and for all.

* * *

Ranma and Akane stood at the top of the stairs. Her knees were shaking. Ranma smiled, reached down and grabbed his fiancee's hand. The ring on her finger felt awkward as it rubbed against her finger. The tomboy looked up at her knight in shining armor and smiled. 

"We can do this," he said, "as long as we stick together."

"Hai." But the butterflies warned her otherwise.

The pair descended the stairs for the first time as a couple. Their hands intertwined, knuckles white as they latched on to one another for support. In the dining room they could hear the rest of the family gathered around the table for breakfast.

"Mr. Soatome, would you like some more rice porridge?"

"Why thank you Kasumi , I don't mind if I do," followed by the soft sound of sword scraping scabbard. "Never mind, I think I've had enough."

"Genma dear, you are doing so well on your diet," Nadoka said.

"So, Nabiki, when do you move into the dorms at Tokyo?" Soun asked.

"For the last time, daddy, I'm not..."

The table went silent as the two fiances walked into the room, hand in hand and sat at the table. Nadoka hid her smile behind her sleeve, as Soun glanced out the window for symbols of the approaching apocalypse. The diamond on Akane's hand sparkled like a beacon. Nabiki sighed in relief; this would distract her father for a little while at least.

"Please pass the soy sauce," Akane said quietly.

Genma leapt to his feet and danced around the table, "Now the two houses will be joined. Praise be to the ancestors."

"This is wonderful," Kasumi smiled, "have you set the date?"

Akane swallowed, "Umm... next week?"

"So soon?" Nadoka beamed, "My son is so manly."

"You know what this means," Happosi leaned toward Nabiki, "Wedding Lingerie."

The couple blushed. Meanwhile, one member of the family was unusually silent.

"Ranma, Akane." Soun placed his chopsticks over his soy sauce bowl. "While I am happy that you have decided on a course of action I cannot let the two of you wed. At least, not yet."

"Why in the hell not?" Ranma stood, flipping the table. Akane, reached up and grabbed the pig-tailed boy's pantleg, taming his temper in an instant.

"When did I tell you at the last ceremony that you could get married?" Soun asked as he brushed rice from his lap.

"When we had taken care of our external circumstances," Akane replied quietly.

"And have the two of you done this?"

"No, he has not," the short haired girl told her father.

"My son is not the only one with external circumstances," Nadoka's voice was frigid. "Thus, neither can I approve of this match until you have resolved yours as well."

"But dear..." Genma started. Her sword scraped the scabbard again and Ranma's father went silent.

"We should give them till the end of the week then?" Soun asked Nadoka.

"Yes this seems reasonable enough."

Ranma sat back down at the table. Akane's hand found his and gave it a small squeeze. This was better than the expected, though worse than they had hoped.

* * *

Konastu crept into the room that he shared with Ryoga. The proposal was botched. The lost-boy continued to live with Ukyo-sama and himself. Konastu did not like this, not at all. But maybe he could find something that could help. 

He started with the backpack. Ryoga's belongings were still largely contained in his backpack. Ryoga never unpacked, instead he lived out of his bag. Only the clothes that he had worn over the past month sat in the drawers. The lost boy's side of the room was Spartan. If he had anything of a personal nature that the waitress could use to get rid of him, it would be in the backpack.

It was full of packages, each bearing the name Akane. Gifts that would never be given. Not now, not ever. Konastu sighed, and placed the packages back in the backpack. There was nothing here, nothing he could use. Or so he thought, until his hand brushed past a long ridge of bound envelopes.

"What's this?" he asked. Konastu pulled his hand out of the backpack, bringing the envelopes with him. Love letters. The gender confused ninja smiled; here was something he could use, a name. Akari Unryuu.

* * *

Shampoo bounded down the stairs, bubbling to the disbelief of the Amazon elder who watched her from the kitchen. 

"What has you so cheerful, grand-daughter?"

"Shampoo have plan... Shampoo know how to separate Arien and Kitchen Destroyer. Shampoo, just need antidote."

"Antidote?" Cologne raised an eyebrow. "An antidote for what, pray-tell?"

"The potion Akane give Arien that make him propose. When have antidote Arien realize mistake Arien making. Arien leave violent girl and come back to Shampoo. All Shampoo need is antidote."

"Ah," the elder sighed, shaking her head softly. The first stage of grief. This would be more difficult than she had hoped.

"So, Grandmother when will Grandmother and Shampoo make antidote?"

"I'm afraid your on your own this time, child."

"Why?"

The Amazon Elder turned her back to her granddaughter and began setting out the ingredients for the days special. "First, there is no antidote to make. Second, even if there was, I cannot help you this time. The council has made other arrangements."

No, Grandmother, I refuse to believe it...

"Japanese, Girl, Japanese." Cologne scolded as she lightly tapped the girl on the head with her staff.

"Grandmother, will help Shampoo... Shampoo insist."

"You insist, do you?" The old ghoul laughed, "My dear child, when you have seen all that I have in life... The rise of the Mongol emperors, finding a mate, the fall of the Mongol emperors. The fall of China, and the beginning of the European Sphere's of influence.' The great civil war that killed my mate. The rise of the communists, and the great cultural revolution that almost killed us all. Not to mention burying children great grand children and their decedents... No, you are 600 years to young to order me around."

"But... Grandmother." The tears brimmed up in the young girl's eyes.

"Child, I know that you think that you love him."

"Shampoo not think, Shampoo know. Grandmother not understand," the Amazon cried as she ran out of the room. "No one but Shampoo understand."

* * *

Mr. Turtle huddled in front of Tatewaki's door with two of the other three male members of the Kuno household. Normally the soft, pink, fleshy creatures in front of him would rouse his appetite, but with mistress on a rampage, his feeding instinct was overwhelmed by his survival instinct. Odds were that if she crossed his path tonight he would be a handbag by morning. That's where the soft, fleshy, pink creatures came in. Without spines or scales the creatures would make easier targets for the mistress. After all, when he was in this group, he did not have to outrun the mistress, only the soft, pink, fleshy creatures. 

The elder, soft, pink one knocked on the door of the strange creature that carried the stick. Mr. Turtle nodded his head in agreement, adding another, weaker member to the group would be a good strategy. "Hey, Tachi, open up de door for de big kahuna, brother. We be needing to talk."

"Foul createn, I told you to never call for me in such a low manner ever again. You will address me as Kuno Takewaki, as befits one of my station," the would be samurai said as he opened the door.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, Brother. Look its about little Sister. Me no think Kodachi be feeling to well, and me and the boys be thinking you should talk to her."

Sasuke, and Mr. Turtle nodded their heads in agreement, a living sacrifice might appease the mistress.

"How, bad could it possibly be?"

An explosion shook the house as Kodachi's maniacal laughter sounded through the house. "Ranma-sama is mine, you inpetulant girl."

The eldest Kuno smiled at his son. "Dat bad."

Tachiwaki sighed, "I do not wish to do this at all." The three other males gasped inhaled in terror, if not Tachiwaki then who would be the sacrifice? "But I have given my word to another... Where is she?"

"In da green-house."

"Very well, I'm off then."

Mr. Turtle , Sasuke and Kuno watched as the youngest male walked to his doom, completely unarmed. "Dere goes a brave brother."

Sasuke smiled, "It's amazing what a man will do for the right girl."

Mr. Turtle shrugged his shoulders in ignorance, while Principal Kuno raised an eyebrow at the servant. There are some questions which should remain unanswered.

* * *

Konastu twirled the phone cord in his hands as he stared at the number he has scrawled on the paper next to Akari's name. His stomach cramped. "Come on, girl. It's not that hard, all you have to do is press a few buttons and say a few words." 

But it was more than a few words. This was going to hurt Ukyo-sama. She had been getting so close to Ryoga lately. Speaking to him in soft tones. Crying unabashed on his shoulder. Talking until the wee hours of the morning. The gender confused boy grinded his teeth. Staying in his room. The lost boy had to go.

One call and Ryoga was gone. This Akari girl would come, and he would leave with her. And Ukyo-sama would be crushed again. She was starting to develop feelings for the strange boy. It would be just like with Ranma again, only worse... because it would be again.

Only this time it would be his shoulder she would cry on. Ukyo would speak to him in soft tones. Talk to him until the wee hours of the morning. He had to make this call, and then he needed to become a man whom Ukyo-sama could love. The gender-confused boy dialed the number, and waited for the voice on the other end.

"Hello."

"Hello, is Akari Unryuu there?"

* * *

Nabiki stood in her younger sisters doorway, and watched as the young couple sat scheming a solution to the external circumstances. Ranma sat at the desk, his scowling head leaning on his fist. Below him Akane sat at his feet, her arm wrapped around his leg. They looked so cute when they were scheming together. 

"Ok, I'll tell Ukyo when I ask her to be the made of honor," Akane said as she threw her hands in the air in frustration. "But I don't understand why you insist that I can't be there when you ask Ryoga to be your best man. He's such a good friend, and I want to tell him myself."

"Just trust me," Ranma said, "You don't want to be there; it will be hard enough to tell him with out you."

"Why would it..."

Nabiki coughed, and the two teenagers scrambled to their feet, "We weren't doing anything."

"You know... when you react like that," the mercenary said trying to suppress a giggle, "you're asking for a hand check."

"A what?" the pig-tailed martial artist asked. His short haired fiance whispered into his ear, and the teen blushed. "You mean we could do that?"

Akane jabbed Ranma in the ribs with a sharp elbow, "Not till after we are married... Pervert."

"I'm not the one who knew what she was talking about, tomboy."

Akane quickly stuck out her tongue at the boy.

"Could you at least wait until I leave before you start flirting with one another?" Nabiki sighed.

"Don't look at us, you started it..." her sister smiled.

"Touche..." Nabiki laughed. That seemed to come so much easily now, the laughter. It had been so hard since mother died, and then...

"What's up, sis?" Ranma asked.

"Nothing," Nabiki lied, "I've just been talking to... Wait, did you just call me sis?"

Ramna shrugged, "Practice?"

"You aren't a part of the family yet." The mercenary arched an eyebrow.

"Nabiki, stop giving my fiance a hard time, and who was it that you were talking to?"

"Oh, yeah," Nabiki said as she leaned against the door frame. "I talked with Kuno-baby yesterday."

"About what?" Akane asked.

"The two of you." The middle Tendo bit her bottom lip. "Let's just say that one pair of your external circumstances has been taken care of."

"How?" Ranma asked, sitting on the bed in confusion.

"Everyone has a secret. Some people are just willing to pay higher prices to keep their secrets than others."

"And how much was Kuno willing to..." Akane asked, trying to wrap her head around the story her sister was telling her.

"He promised to give up on the Pigtailed girl, and the Goddess Akane Tendo. He will agree to keep his sister in check as well... or else."

"How... why..." the couple stammered.

"How is one of my secrets," Nabiki smiled, "As for why... it's your wedding present. It was the least I could do after last time."

"Thanks," Ranma said, "this means a lot."

"I know," Nabiki smiled as she turned to walk away, "Just keep those hands where we can see them."

The two teenagers looked down at the floor in embarrassment, and then back at each other. Akane's mischievous grin caught Ranma's eye.

"Tomboy, why are you looking at me like that?"

* * *

The ancient elder looked down at the letter that she had written the tribal council where it sat on the table along side the note that had accompanied it on its return. This was not a good sign. Something bad was happening at the village. Due to political instability in the area, we are unable to deliver this post to the given address. For further information please contact the embassy in Tokyo. 

Cologne, lit her pipe, and meditated on the meaning behind the note. For the first time in many years she was afraid.

* * *

Kuno wrapped on his sister's door. The house had grown unusually still. And while Kodachi could be pompous, elitist and bothersome, she was his sister. A situation which required that he show some concern from time to time. 

"Foul witch, are you alright, or should I call for the servants to cut your body down from the rafters?"

"And why would they need to do that?" the Black Rose asked from behind the door.

"Well, I was hoping that you had already hung yourself."

The door opened, and the dark haired girl greeted him with a smug smile, "Sorry to disappoint, brother dear. But as you can see I have no need to dangle my body from the ceiling like some strange fruit hanging from a tree."

"Ah, so it is to be poison then?" Kuno asked.

"Why would I want to poison myself on the eve of my engagement?"

"To whom, and why haven't I met the man?"

"But brother dear, you have," Kodachi smiled. "Don't you remember Ranma-sama from your school? Or have you taken one to may blows to the head?"

"Ranma?" Kuno looked at his sister in confusion.

"Well, he was out shopping for rings yesterday, surely the rain kept him away last night, or he would have proposed then," Kodachi beamed. "Is it not wonderful? It's just like a romance novel, where I am the lead... And Ranma is my knight in shining armor."

Kuno looked at his sister mutely and nodded his head.

"Now if you will please excuse me I must be ready for my Ranma-sama when he gets here," Kodachi said as she pushed her brother away from her door, and closed it behind her.

* * *

Kasumi sat at the table in the living-room with Nadoka, as the two of them looked over catalogues and laughed together. Kasumi sighed, "Oh, Auntie. Things just won't be the same around here when you get your apartment fixed again." 

"Tell me about it Kasumi ," Mr. Soatome smiled, "It's been nice to have someone around for girl talk."

"Things just aren't going to be the same when you're apartment's repairs are finished."

"Oh, please," Nadoka rolled her eyes, "You know I'll come by every few days for to visit my husband... after all, you didn't think I was going to take him with me did you?"

The eldest Tendo giggled. "Auntie, you're terrible."

A petite cough from the corner cabinet caught. A diminutive girl stood in the corner, her mouth covered by her sleeve.

"Well, hello..." Nadoka said, turning in her chair.

"Hello..." the young girl replied.

"It's Konastu isn't it, the male kunochi?" Kasumi asked.

"Yes, I am."

"I remember father talking about you. May I get you some tea?" the eldest Tendo asked as she picked up the kettle.

"Thank you, I would love some," the gender confused boy replied as he walked to the table.

"Konastu... Oh wait I remember you from the wedding... you came with Ukyo. I'm afraid that my son isn't in right now, but if..."

"Actually, Mrs. Saotome I'm here to talk to you." Konastu interjected. Nadoka gave the boy an appraising look and motioned for him to continue. "You see, I was raised by my stepmother and two sisters to be a girl. I've always been happy like this in the past but..."

"There is a girl, isn't there?" Nadoka sipped her tea. "And, I bet she's in love with my son, isn't she?"

Konastu nodded his head. "You and your husband raised Ranma to be a man among men. I thought that if that is what she wanted, then maybe I should..."

"And you want me to help you become a man among men?"

The kunochi nodded.

"Well, Kasumi , what do you think?"

"Well, Auntie, it will definitely be a challenge."

Mrs. Saotome smiled, "The life of a Martial Artist is filled with peril, and one cannot back down from a challenge"

Konastu looked at the two laughing ladies and trembled in fear.

* * *

Shampoo sat at the table in the kitchen. Her eyes framed in a raccoon mask. She had not slept for two days. Dreams were not coming easy to the girl as of late. Her thoughts would not let her sleep. They kept drifting to the rooftop. 

"Have some tea." Mousse placed a cup of dark liquid on the table in front of her.

"Shampoo want nothing from Mousse." The pink-haired girl half-heartedly pushed the cup aside with the back of her hand.

"Shampoo..."

"Shampoo not understand how Kitchen Destroyer do it. Violent girl no steal potion from Grandmother. Must have taken from Doctor."

"Shampoo, it's not a potion."

"Potion will be hard to reverse without knowing what potion made from."

Mousse sighed, she was not listening. She had not been listening for two days now. Cologne had tried to tell her after she finally came to. "I know this is hard for you to accept. I listened to you cry yourself to sleep last night. But Ranma loves Akane. You can not change that with either a potion or a plan..."

"Grandma said Grandmother not help this time." Shampoo whispered to herself, "But Mousse help, no? Mousse always help."

_Damnit_, Mousse yelled at Shampoo in Mandarin. He leaned across the table, knocking over the teacup, spilling the tea on the floor. _He does not love you. Don't you understand. You lost, she won. Game over. When are you going to get this through that thick skull of yours?_

_I did not loose. I never loose._ Shampoo shook with rage, _I'm the strongest warrior in the village. I have been victorious against much greater foes than that clumsy, clueless, Japanese home wrecker who thinks she can steal my man._

_Damnit, woman, he was never your man. Why do you refuse to listen to reason?_

_Maybe, it's because you're yelling at a bush._ Shampoo's eyes dripped venom as she stared at the blind boy.

"Shampoo, I'm sorry." Mousse's shoulders slumped as he lost his composure. Meekly he turned from the fichus.

"Mousse, silence." Shampoo's voice turned to ice. "Shampoo not need Duck-boy's help."

Mousse watched as Shampoo turned away and climbed the stairs to the cafe's living quarters. The tap of a staff clicking on tile surprised him, as the wrinkled elder tossed a dishrag over his shoulder.

"Clean up your mess, Mr. Part-timer." She said, as she turned back towards the Kitchen. "The tea is dripping onto the floor."

Mousse down at the puddle of tea that was collecting on the floor. The elder was right, it was time to clean up the mess. "Hey, old Ghoul..."

"Yes, child?"

"Can you do without me for the next few nights?"

"That depends, why?"

"I have a promise to keep..." the boy said softly.

A small hand rested sympathetically on his shoulder. No, the last few days would not be boring at all, "and miles to go before you sleep, I'm afraid... miles to go before you sleep."


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

"My hands are tied  
My body bruised,  
She's got me with  
Nothing to win and  
Nothing left to lose"  
-U2, "With or Without You"

Akane looked up at the mid-morning sky. The rain from the night before had washed the Tokyo sky clean creating a perfect romantic setting for a walk with her fiance. The beauty of the setting almost made up for the fact that they were walking to his best-friend, and former fiancée's resturant... almost. "Could you tell me again why I have to be the one to tell Ukyo about the engagement?"

"Because you're forcing me to tell Ryoga when I ask him to be the best man."

Akane glaired at her fiance, "Some comparison. Ukyo is one of you're fiancèes. Ryoga is just a friend. I get to face certain death, while you get to pall around with one of your sparring partners."

"That's what you think," Ranma muttered under his breath.

"What was that?" Akane asked.

"Nothing," Ranma quickly replied. That wasn't something he had meant to say out loud. "Hey, you know we could always switch... You know like I suggested last night."

"We've been through this a thousand times," Akane sighed, "Ukyo is not going to be the best man."

"Why not?" Ranma asked, "Besides, you could always have Ryoga as the Maid of Honor."

Akane glared at her fiance, "Ranma, I am not going to force Ukyo to wear a tux on my wedding day."

"And yet, you are perfectly willing to force me and Pig-boy into one. Besides, Akane, ya have to admit, Ryoga would look cute in a dress."

Akane jabbed the pig-tailed boy just below his ribs, driving the air from his lungs. "Bad, Ranma," she said, her lips twisted into a scowl. She wanted to be upset at her baka fiance, but the image of Ryoga in a Yellow dress with black polka dots was working against her. "So, have you figured out how you are going to find him?"

"I thought I'd just come with you to Ukyo's and then play it by ear from there."

"So, you're just going to wander around the district and hope you run into him?" Akane asked.

Ranma shrugged, "Yeah, that and listen for the Ranma, prepare to die.' Why, you got a better idea?"

Akane paused for a moment. "Well you could try... No... You could... well... Never mind." she said as she reached out for her fiance's hand, "Your idea will work about as well as anything I can think of."

Ranma took the short haired girl's hand in his and smiled a cocky smile. He would never tell her, but somehow he couldn't shake a sense of impending doom that seemed to flow through the morning. "Don't worry," he said, more for his own sake rather than to calm her fears, "Everything's going to be alright. So no more worrying, ok?"

* * *

Shampoo stood in the center of the empty lot behind the Cat Cafe, her twin swords crossed front of her chest, as she slowly inhaled. Scattered about the lot eleven watermelons balanced on posts of varying heights. She lifted her right leg, sliding it up her left leg until she stood perfectly balanced on the tips of her toes. The Amazon warrior exhaled, opened her dark eyes, and then moved. 

How dare that hussy kitchen destroyer steel her husband. The twin blades flashed as the Amazon warrior whirled around the lot like a dervish. That flat chested want-to-be tramp, when she got her hands on that girl... One by one the melons burst, as the silver swords swept in killing strokes. He was everything that she had ever wanted, but he wanted nothing to do with her. The only time he ever spent any time with her was when he needed her for something, or when she teased him with a promise of a cure. Even though she had offered him everything that she was he had rejected her, and taken up with that... that... that obstacle. And she knew what to do with obstacle. The final mellon fell to the ground, as Shampoo came to a perfectly balanced rest in the center of the empty lot.

"I that the kata that I taught you when you were five?" Cologne asked, startling her great-granddaughter, causing her to loose her balance and fall to the ground. "It looks like you've added a few moves to it though.

"It same," Shampoo said, wiping the mixture of grass and sticky red juice off of the blades of her twin swords with a handkerchief. "Mousse attack sometimes when Shampoo practice, force Shampoo to hit Mousse. So, Shampoo add strike to Kata, makes exercise more difficult."

"It seems then that Mr. Part-timer has been helping you with your training." Cologne replied as she bounced down from her perch on the Cafe roof.

"Duck-boy help with nothing. To blind to be useful for anything."

Cologne sighed, her Great-Granddaughter didn't call Mousse silly or stupid. He must have hit a nerve last night. "Where is the boy anyway? I thought for sure that he would be out here with you. He wasn't in his bed last night, and I haven't seen him all morning. We open soon, and we need that lazy boy's help with the lunch rush."

"Kia," Shampoo screamed as she swung one of her swords, splitting the post to her right in two. "Shampoo not care... Mousse can go to Hell for all Shampoo care."

Cologne smiled to herself as she turned back to the cafe, Mousse was more successful in his pursuit of Shampoo than he would ever realize.

Shampoo watched her grandmother leave, before she set-up more melons on the remaining posts. First Grandmother abandoned her, then Mousse. If she was going to have to do this by herself she needed to train. Picking up a mellon, she paused. Mousse would usually do this for her. Stupid Mousse. It wasn't like she missed him.

* * *

Akari looked up at the empty pen beside her bed as she placed her last shirt inside her overnight bag. She was packed, but she still was not sure if she should go. If that Konastu girl was right, then that Ukyo person was going to steal her Ryoga away from her. She trusted Ryoga, he was as honest as a pig, but her piglet was gone so often that he might forget about her and the love she had for him. 

But then there was the pen, she had kept it there next to her bed to remind her every morning. To this day, she could still remember her grandfather's words.

"Akari dear, sometimes, when you really love something, or someone, you have to let them go." "But why grandfather?" she had asked. "Because, child," his face framed in a soft smile, "Sometimes, when you try to hold on to tightly to something you love, you end up destroying it." 

Akari didn't want to loose Ryoga. That was one of the reasons that she was going to go to Nerima. She wanted to remind him of how much she loved him. But then, if he really did love this other person she would not try to hold on to him. She had learned that lesson. It would hurt, but she would do it... for him.

She just could not understand it. He had always been so affectionate, and had seemed passionate enough the few times that they had kissed. But after the phone-call, it almost made sense. How could Ryoga be gay? But then, it would explain why he was as sensitive and caring as a pig.

* * *

Sasuke opened the gate to the Kuno estate and smiled at the girl who stood before him. "Miss. Tendo, if we keep meeting one another like this people will talk." 

"Well if they must talk," Nabiki said as she bent down and kissed the ninja's forehead, "then let's give them something to talk about."

Sasuke blushed, "What has you in such a good mood today?"

"I just got word back from Harvard. I was granted the Onassis Fellowship. Not only will I get a full ride, but they are giving me money for room, board, and other expenses.' Can you believe it?"

"Please Mistress Tendo, information is my livelihood. Personally I am surprised that they did not grant you tenure."

"Wait till I graduate," Nabiki said with a wink, "How else do you think those Brahman's are going to pay off their gambling debts?"

"I'm sure your professors are quaking in fear." Sasuke replied, "But surely this is not a pleasure trip, do you need to see the young master about business?"

"Ever the responsible servant?" Nabiki sighed, as she walked past the servant. "Yes, I'm here to see Kuno-baby. He is in I presume."

"He currently resides in the rock garden... we are waiting for the storm to subside."

"Storm?"

Sasuke smiled, "You will see."

* * *

The bells that hung over the entrance of Uc-chan's refused to ring out in their cheerful welcome as the two newly engaged teens walked into the restaurant hand-in-hand. Instead, a muffled tone drifted across the scattered tables. Sergeant Kokutai, a thirteen year veteran of the Nerima police force, and the rest of the old faithful quickly cleared their tabs and settled their bills, having witnessed the chief's temper enough times to understand that anywhere else would be a better place to wait for the morning shift to begin. Those who were new to the restaurant on the other hand sat and watched in amazement as half of Uc-chan's patrons cleared out of the building in a few seconds. 

"Hey, Uc-chan," Ranma called from the front door as he instinctively let go of his fiancée's hand, "How are ya doing?"

"I'm fine, Ran-chan," the chef said through grinding teeth. Her hands clamped down on the hilt of her spatula hard enough to leave permanent hand-prints.

"Hey, have you seen Ryoga lately?" the pig-tailed martial artist asked, oblivious to the long-haired's expression. "I need to talk to the porker."

"Actually Ran-chan, Ryoga-kun's in the back, do you want me to get him for you?"

"Yes, thanks Uc-chan, you're the best," the pig-tailed boy said, not noticing the evil gleam in the chef's eye as she turned towards the back room.

"Hey, Ryo-chan, guess who just showed up for breakfast," Ukyo said just a bit too eagerly as she walked through the kitchen door.

A look of fear and understand dawned the short haired girl's face as she pulled her fiance close to her and whispered in his ear, "Ranma, I think she knows."

"Knows about what?" he asked his fiancée.

"Baka, she knows about this," she said as she held her ring in his face and pointed at the dimond.

"Wait, it she knows and P-chan's here with Uc-chan, then..."

"Ranma, because of you I've seen hell," a familiar voice said, causing the Pig-tailed boy to turn white with fear. "Prepare to die."

"Wait Ryoga, let me explain," he cried as the pig-boy leapt over the grill, catching the young martial artist in a flying tackle. Ryoga's momentum caused the two boys to tumble end over end and carried them out the restaurant door.

Akane laughed nervously as she watched the two boys roll out the door and into the street. "That's boys for you, always fighting."

Ukyo lifted the battle-spatula off of her back, "Sugar, don't think you're getting off that easy."

* * *

Principal Kuno sat in his man-made lagoon, the contents of two envelopes spread out on his lounge chair's footrest. "So little brudar, you teller me that the Tendo kiekie told Tachi that if he didn't do what she said, she was going to take this to the authorities." 

"Yes, master," Sasuke said.

"Does she know what dis actually means?"

"No, Master, she does not."

"And he's reacted to dis by..."

"He asked me to send an application to Boston College."

"So, dis problem..." Principal Kuno said, pointing at the envelope with the words _Nabiki Tendo_ written on the front. "Solves de problem in de other envelope."

"Yes, master."

"Den how is dis a problem?" the Principal asked.

Sasuke sat silent for a moment, "It's not?"

* * *

Cologne sat across from the Consulate General, _Forgive my impertinence, sonny, but when you reach my age words sometimes become jumbled. How long has it been since the government lost contact with the providence?_

The Consulate General squirmed under the Amazon Elder's gaze. _We haven't been able to get any word from the Jousinkio providence since a little under two months ago._

_Last time we talked it had only been a few weeks._

_Last time we talked, the party believed that your village was behind the uprising,_ the Consulate General said, shuffling his feet on the floor.

_It took you this long to realize that the timing of the uprising and the timing of the magistrate's arival were connected?_ Cologne raised a single eyebrow at the unspoken accusation.

_Consider our position,_ the Consulate General said, _You are a village of warriors who were fiercely loyal to the emperor._

_We are a village of harmless old women who are nostalgic for the past._

_Harmless my ass,_ the Consulate General said, _You have the ability to destroy a T-32 with a touch. You are many things, but you are not harmless._

Cologne crossed her arms in a frown. _We are a tribe of thousands in a nation of billions. We are of no threat to anyone._

_If you are a threat to no one, then why do roomers persist that your tribe is harboring the Emperor's heir?_

_Bah, everyone knows the Emperor died childless. There is no heir._

_That's not entirely true, there was the "stillborn" child._

_I assure you,_ the elder said, her eyes sharp and clear, _that boy did not survive the night._

_And you know this because..._ the Consulate General said as he leaned in across the desk to better hear the old woman.

_Because, these are the hands that took the life of that child._

The Consulate General slapped his hands on the table and laughed. _You are lying. But it is a good story none the less. Its a shame that the party has decided to decimate the providence and scatter it. Tales like that are a national treasure. Its a shame that we must now destroy the cultures that have spawned some of our most endearing legends._

Cologne leaned back in her chair, her face went ashen as she contemplated the party's decision. _You are going to execute one person in ten._

_Yes, such a loss of life, and in four weeks the People's Army will carry out the party's orders. This, of course will cause us to loose face in our talks with North Korea, and with the WTO, but this is unavoidable... Unless... but that may be too much to ask, even of one such as you._

Cologne's eyes narrowed, she knew exactly whet the Consulate General wanted from her, _So, if in four weeks there is no uprising?_

The Consulate General shrugged, _Then there would be no reason to decimate the providence._

_If I were to do this, what support could we expect from the party?_

_Officially, the party can offer no support... Unofficially, you will find that your travels will be unhindered. Will you do this for China?_

_For China, no. This I do for my people,_ the elder answered.

_As long as it is done,_ the Consulate General replied, _The party is unconcerned with your motivations._

_I will need time to gather help._

_Take all the time that you want. But the army attacks in 28 days._

* * *

Ranma rolled to his right as Ryoga's fist streaked past the pig-tailed boy's ear and shattered the wall behind him. "Damn it, Ranma, how are we going _talk_ about your engagement if you're not going to stand still and _listen_ to my side of the argument?" 

"No thanks," Ramna said as he flipped over his rival and perched on his backpack, "if I've got plans for this week."

"Don't worry, I'm not going to kill you." the pig-boy said as he reached up and grabbed Ranma by his collar, "I just want to show you a little bit of hell."

"Please, bacon-breath, it ain't like you're serious."

"What makes you so sure?" Ryoga asked, his lips twisted into a smirk.

"You haven't used your umbrella," Ranma said, "When you really want to kill me, the umbrella always comes out."

Ryoga lowered Ranma to the ground, and smiled, "True, but you should have seen the look on your face back in the restaurant. I though you were going to soil yourself. So, what do you wan't to talk about? Another Chinese prince come to town?"

"Not to my knowledge," the pig-tailed boy said, "It's something else, and you might change your mind about that umbrella"

"Ranma, I already know about the engagement."

"You see Ryoga, I kinda asked... Wait you already know... How did you find out? We just told our families yesterday. How?"

"We were all on the roof the night you asked."

"_All_? Who was up there with you?"

"Everyone." Ryoga said as he rubbed the back of his head.

"And by _Everyone_ you mean..."

"Me, Ukyo, Shampoo, Moose, and Cologne..."

"Ukyo knows?"

Ryoga nodded mutely.

"Poor Uc-chan."

* * *

Ukyo flung her last two spatulas at Ranma's fiancée as she flickered about Uc-chan's dining room. The Chef muttered a hand full of curses in Russian that Ryoga had taught her the night before. All of her projectiles had been aimed true, but the short-haired home-wrecker had managed to dodge each and every one of them. It was though she was fighting Ran-chan. 

No, that wasn't quite right. Ranma passed through your attacks, walked through kicks and punches in order to come at you from every conceivable direction. It was though he was everywhere and nowhere at the same time. Akane, on the other hand, was always somewhere. But, you couldn't tell where that somewhere was going to be from one moment to the next. The movement was random, and etherial as she danced about the room. Yet, there was purpose to the dance, as each step, each flicker, brought her closer to Ukyo. The long-haired girl barely had enough time to lift the battle spatula from its holster before Akane surged under her defence and screamed at the top of her lungs, "Phoenix's Embrace."

In the span of a heartbeat the short haired girl unleashed a series of punches and kicks that the chef into the air, only to slam her back onto the laminate floor. The last thing that Ukyo saw before surrendering to the darkness at the edge of her vision was the sight of a familiar cocky grin on Akane's face.

* * *

Kasumi held up the mirror so that Konastu could see the miracle that Nadoka had performed on Konastu's hair. "Well, whet do you think?" Kasami asked the male kunoichi. 

The gender confused waitress reached up and gingerly felt his freshly cut hair, and cried. "It's so short."

"I think it looks good," Nadoka said with a reassuring pat.

"But I look like a boy."

"Konastu-kun," Kasumi smiled, "I thought you wanted to be a man-among-men for Ukyo?"

"I do, but did you have to cut it so short?"

"Yes, I did," Nadoka said, "Now stop whining. Real men don't whine."

"I'm not whining. I'm not... I'm not... I'm not."

Kasumi and Nadoka rolled their eyes and looked silently at their pupil. In a few moments, the male konoichi withered under their gaze. "Ok, I'm finished now," the female ninja said.

"So," Kasumi said, in an attempt to change the subject,"What does a man among men say then he is thirsty?"

"Hey doll, where's my beer," Konastu said with a forced grimace. "And make sure it's an Orion special, not some of that happoshu crap."

"Good," Nadoka said, as Kasumi squealed in delight. "That was perfect."

"Saotome-san, Tendo-san..." Konastu asked, "Are you sure this is what Ukio-sama wants in a man?"

"She wants my son doesn't she?"

Konastu nodded.

"Then whether she knows it or not this is what she wants. Now, what do you say when you want to watch Television?" Nadoka replied as Kasumi shrugged in agreement.

Konastu sighed. Well if it was what Ukyo-sama wanted... "Hey, doll..."

* * *

Ukyo woke to the sight of Akane standing over her. The short haired girl's hands hung in loose fists at her side as she watched for any sudden movement from her rival. Ukyo held up her hand in silent surrender, acknowledging her defeat. The tomboy stood in mute understanding. Moving astride her friend and one time rival the girl extended her hand. "How long has Ran-chan been training you?" Ukyo asked as she pulled herself up to her feet. 

"On Friday it will be two months," Akane said. "How did you know?"

"Well, it was pretty obvious when you handed me my ass in just one move."

Akane shook her head and laughed,"Not the training... About me and Ranma, how long have you known?"

"Shampoo and I were up on the roof when he asked you," the long-haired girl said as she sat down at the bar. "We heard everything."

"I am sorry. I did not want you to find out that way."

"No, you wanted to come to my restaurant and rub it into my face," Ukyo said.

"That's not the reason I am here."

"Really," Ukyo asked, "then why did you feel the need to come in here holding his hand?"

"Ukyo," Akane said, "I did not do it to hurt you."

"I would have," the long haired girl said, "I would have paraded him around your dojo just so that you knew that he was mine. You can't tell me that you didn't."

"Your right," she said, "Part of me wanted you to know he was mine. But that is not the reason I am here."

Ukyo snorted, "Please, sugar, it ain't like you're here to ask me to be the Maid-of-honor."

The short haired girl shuffled her feet as she looked at her shoes.

"You're not..." the cook said, "Oh, you have got to be kidding me."

"It was Ranma's idea Ukyo," Akane said, "He insisted that I ask you so that you could be in the wedding."

"He didn't," Ukyo said, hoping to find some hint of mirth in Akane's eyes. "He did. That self-centered, conceded son-of-a-bitch actually expects me to be you're maid-of-honor."

"I tried warning him." Akane said, giving the chef a sympathetic Pat on the back.

"I can't believe it. Who does that Adonis think he is?"

"Tell me about it," the short haired girl said, "I'll just tell him that you said no."

Ukyo glared at he girl sitting next to her,"Oh no you don't. I know what you're up to."

"What am I up to? " Akane asked.

"You want to keep me out of the wedding so that Ranma thinks I abandoned him," the chef said, her eyes glowing.

"No, Ukyo I just though..."

"You'd use this as an opportunity to get me out of the picture for good?"

"Look," Akane said, "it's not like that."

"Really," Ukyo said, "Then why were you so quick to get rid of me?"

"I wasn't trying to get rid of you, I was just trying to keep you from..."

"...keep me from being in the wedding, that's what you were trying to do. Well if you think you're going to get rid of me that easy you'ld better think again sugar."

Ranma's fiancée blinked, "So... does that mean you'll come with me tomorrow to try on dresses?"

"I wouldn't miss it for the world," the chef said glaring at her one time rival.

* * *

Kuno smiled warmly at Nabiki the second she came into view, a sentiment that set the mercenary girl ill at ease. She was here to bleed the eldest Kuno child, she should be inspiring feelings of fear and dread not fondness and relief. "My savior has arrived at long last," Kuno said, bowing slightly at his guest. "I take it that you have business with me today? Would you care to discuss it over a parfait at the ice cream shop, or over lunch at the new French restaurant in the mercantile district?" 

Nabiki lifted an eyebrow, "And why are you in such a hurry to leave today?"

"No reason," Kuno said under gritted teeth. "I am just in a generous mood this afternoon."

The shattering of glass as it hit the wall erupted from inside the house as a feminine followed by a feminine voice. "I specifically said that the grooms cake was to be made of dark chocolate and whole, fresh strawberries. Fresh not frozen, were you listening or have you been deaf from birth?"

Nabiki laughed, "That certainly sounds like no reason."

"And each tier of my bride's cake is to have seven layers. Three tiers, each with seven layers. The numbers must be perfect to assure a perfect wedding."

"What can I say," the swordsman shrugged, "she's intent on driving the household mad with her preparations for her wedding ceremony."

"And who's the lucky... groom?"

"A Ranma Soatome... I believe you know him?"

"No, the China must have black roses, not red. Send them back."

"That may be a little difficult as he is going to marry my sister," Nabiki said.

"Oh, then give my heart felt congratulations to Kasumi, though I thought she deserved better."

"I don't care if they were hand painted, he should known that I wanted black roses, not red. There is no way in hell I'm paying for these."

"Kuno-chan, Ranma is getting married to my younger sister, Akane."

Kuno stood to his feet, "The foul sorcerer Soatome is to wed the beauteous Akane Tendo. This I will not allow."

Nabiki wagged her finger in the swordsman's face. "Yes, you will. Remember the envelope? Those were just copies. The original documents are still in my possession."

Kuno sat back down and glared at the middle Tendo girl, "Then what would you have me do? Surely you cannot expect me to sit idly by and do nothing?"

"No, I expect you to go shopping," Nabiki smiled, "You're going to buy a wedding gift for the couple. Make sure that it's worth over ten thousand yen, but no more than one hundred thousand yen."

"You can't be serious," Kodachi screamed from inside the manor, "I asked for a black kimono... a black kimono... Who in their right mind would wear a white dress on their wedding day?"

"And she has to come too... Bound and gaged so that she can't interfere."

"You ask to much." Kuno said.

"I'm not the one with secrets to protect," Nabiki said.

* * *

Ryoga snickered, "So let me get this strait... You're getting married at the end of this week, and you want me to be the Best-Man?" 

"It ain't that funny." Ranma growled, "Besides it was Akane's idea."

"Then why did you go along with it?"

"Because I love her."

"Well," Ryoga said, shaking his head, "That's something I'll never get used to hearing. So, I get to be Best-Man because neither of us can tell that girl no."

"Pretty much," Ranma smiled.

"So where does this leave us. I mean, don't think for a second that this means that I like you or anything, so don't expect for me to suddenly get buddy-buddy and want to be your best friend."

"I don't want to be your friend either," Ranma's face fell into a frown. "Friends leave, walk away, turn their backs on you, and betray you. You never know where you really stand with a friend. Know what I mean?"

Ryoga nodded silently. It was something that he was very familiar with.

"You're my Best-Enemy, Ryoga," Ranma said. "I always know where I stand with you."

"One of these days I'm going to hit you so hard that it knocks that self-righteous smirk off of your face." Ryoga said.

"And one of these days I'm going to hit you hard enough that you can't just shake it off."

"And God help the son-of-a-bitch who thinks he's going to beat me to it," the two boys finished at the same time.

"See, Ryoga," Ranma said "I always know where I stand with you."

* * *

Kasumi looked at Konastu, as he stood match in hand over the barrel containing every Kimono that he owned, "Are you sure about this, Konostu-kun?" 

The ninja nodded, as he dropped the lit match into the mixture of kerosene and silk. Kasumi smiled at _him_... The once kunochi was definitely a he now. "I'm sure. If I'm going to win her, there can be no turning back."

"Is she worth it?" Nadoka asked.

Konastu smiled up at Nadoka, "Ukyo-sama is worth everything."

"In that case, here," Kasumi said as she handed the ninja an overstuffed bag.

"What is it?"

"Just some clothes from father's younger days that he has outgrown. I thought you could use them,"

"Thank you Kasumi," Konastu said as he pulled the two women in for a hug. "I won't forget this."

"Just make sure that you woo that Ukyo girl," Nadoka said.

"I will." Konastu bowed to the two women and shouldered the bag of clothes. Waving good-by he turned and walked out of the courtyard, and towards the main gate.

"Do you think he can do it?" Kasumi asked the Soatome matriarch.

"I hope so," Nadoka answered, "If so that would be one obstacle down..."

* * *

Ukiyo pulled out the Kirin as Ryoga walked back into the restaurant, "Looks like I'm not the only one who needs a drink." 

"Minors arn't allowed to drink," the pig-boy said as he twisted open his beer.

"It's not stopping you."

"That's because I've just had the worst day in the history of man," Ryoga said, taking a pull from the draft.

Ukyo forced herself into a half smile, "Really, I bet I've got you beat."

"What's the wager?" Ryoga asked as he drained his beer.

"Dishes," the long-haired girl said, "for the next two weeks."

"That's a sucker bet if I've ever heard one."

"And who's the sucker?" Ukyo asked.

"You are, Ranma asked me to be the best man."

The chef threw her head back and laughed.

"What's so funny?" Ryoga asked.

"Akane asked me to be the Maid-of-honor." Ukyo said as she wiped a tear from her eye.

"Damn, and here I thought I had you."

"Tell me about it," Ukyo said, "I mean, what's the odds of that happening to both of us?"

Ryoga nodded, "A tie... but who has to do the dishes?"

* * *

Ranma held Akane's hand as the two walked past the city's park. "Well, that went better than I could have hoped," Ranma said as his fiancée beamed at him, "Five seconds, not bad for your first time, you didn't hurt her to bad did you?" 

"What happened to showing concern for your bride to be?" Akane asked frowning at the pig-tailed boy.

"Technically, I am," Ranma said just before the short haired girl by his side planted her elbow in his side. "Seriously, I knew you would take her, I just didn't want you to hurt her. You need the sparing partner."

"Don't worry," Akane sighed, "I didn't do anything to badly, I just let her know that you were taken."

The pig-tailed martial artist laughed, "Somehow I doubt that was all you did. Anyway, at least we have two obstacles down. I don't know what we're going to do with the others though."

"I don't know what we're going to do about that Chinese Bimbo," the short haired girl replied.

"Maybe I can help," Mouse said from behind the couple.

"And why should we trust you?" Akane asked, slipping into a ready position.

"Because, Shampoo refuses to acknowledge what has become plain to everyone including yourselves."

Akane opened her mouth to respond, only to stop. "Do you know what he's talking about?"

"Ryoga told me that Shampoo found out the same way Ukyo did." Ranma replied, "So, what's she got planned this time, she and the old ghoul going to tear the place apart again?"

Mouse shook his head, "No, the mummy has decided to sit this one out. Shampoo is on her own this time."

"That still spells trouble," Akane said, "She is difficult to beat when she is fighting for Ranma. How are we going to stop her without killing her?"

"You can't," the blind boy said, "Which is why this time, I am going to help."

* * *

Ukyo was of the opinion that all things have a simple and elegant solution, especially dish washing. It was amazing how well the solution worked, Ryoga scrubbed, while Ukyo rinsed and stacked. It was perfect, not only did the system help her avoid the more disgusting work, but Ryoga was also able to scrub the carbon scoring off of her pots and pans. Her spatula was cleaner now than it had been in years. Sure, the lost boy was mess as all get-out, with soap suds flying all over the kitchen, but the soap would just help break down the grease that had been spilled on the floor during her fight with Akane. Of course, the suds on Ryoga's nose were kind of cute too. "Ryoga, hold still for a second," the chef said as she reached out with her washrag and wiped He suds from his nose. "You had some soap on you. " 

The pig boy blushed, suddenly aware of the lack of space between them, "Thanks, Ukyo."

"No Ryoga, I couldn't have made it through this without you," she said reaching up to kiss him lightly or the cheek, "Thank you."

Ryoga blinked, Ukyo had kissed him. But surely this had to be another day dream. Things like this never happened to him in real life. But then Ukyo had never appeared in his daydreams before.

"Ryoga Hibiki, prepare to die!" Konastu yelled as he pushed the pig-boy away from his Ukyo-sama. The shock of seeing Uc-chan's bubbly waitress in such masculine garb knocked Ryoga off his balance, allowing Konastu's uppercut to catch him on the jaw unguarded, and knock him to the ground.

"Konastu," Ukyo yelled, "What is this about?"

The young man pointed at his clothes, at his hair, at his un-adorned face. "This, this is what it's about. I'm doing my best to become a man among men, and you go and kiss him. It's not fair."

"I don't understand." Ukyo replied. "What does my kissing Ryoga on the cheek have to do with you dressing like a man?"

"Because I did it for you," Konastu said as he dashed out of the kitchen and up the stairs, slamming the door to his and Ryoga's shared room.

"But, I..." Ukyo began, only to close her eyes as the male kunochi's words sunk in. "Oh no. Why didn't I see this Sugar."

"See what?" Ryoga asked as he sat up on the floor.

"Konastu... he has a crush." Ukyo said, as she bent down to examine Ryoga's cheek. "Does it hurt?" Ukyo asked, reaching out to touch Ryoga's cheek.

"Only my pride," Ryoga grumbled, "he hits almost as hard as Ranma." Her touch felt good on his skin.

"Well, he did fight Ran-chan to a standstill once. Don't be to hard on him, he's just upset, he's usually not like this."

Ryoga sighed, "I know, I understand how he feels. What are you going to do about it?"

"I don't know." Ukyo said looking at the stairs.

"Why don't you go somewhere and think about it. He doesn't deserve to be dangled on a string like this. No one does."

"But what about the dishes?"

"Don't worry about it, I'll take care of the rest of the cleaning tonight."

"Are you sure?" Ukyo asked. Ryoga nodded. "Thank you," she whispered as she leaned in to kiss him on the cheek again.

Ryoga froze, unable to move as she walked away, and up the stairs. A slow smile crossed his face as he reached up and touched the warmth left by her lips on his cheek.

"Ryoga-kun," a sweet female voice said from the dining area behind him, "Why did you let that girl kiss you?"

"Akari," Ryoga said as he turned towards the girl behind him. Behind the school girl stood a rather large pig, who's eyes glowed in rage. "I can explain everything."

"Good," the girl said, "I want to hear it."

* * *

File translated from TEX by TTH, version 3.77.  
On 01 Feb 2007, 12:18. 


	7. Chapter 7

Ranma 1/2: A Wedding

Chapter 7

"I don't want to be in love."  
-Good Charlotte.

Ryoga sat behind the counter and refilled Akari's mug for the fifth time since midnight. "…and that's the whole story."

"So, you're fairly sure that she thinks of you as just a friend, but you're kinda, sorta, maybe developing some sort of feelings for her," Akari said, a small crease wrinkling her brow.

"No, no…" Ryoga said, "that's not it at all."

"Piglet," Akari frowned, as she patted his cheek gently with her hand, "you are good at many things, lying isn't one of them."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean for it to happen." Ryoga sighed and leaned against the farm girl's hand.

"Poor Ryoga," the farm girl said, "a heart as loving as a pig, but you are as faithful as a boar."

"If you never want to speak to me again I'll understand."

"Silly piglet," Akari said, "I'm not leaving."

"You're not breaking up with me then? But what about what's happened between myself and Ukyo?"

The farm girl sighed, "My grandfather made sure to teach me two things about men. One, I could only marry someone strong enough to defeat a champion sumo-pig, and two, all men cheat."

"Not all men cheat."

"You did."

Ryoga blushed. "So, what now?"

"Well, you need to stick around so that you can be in Ranma's wedding."

"And what about you?"

"I'm going to stick around to make sure you don't do anything inappropriate with this Ukyo girl."

* * *

Ranma sat against the wall and watched as his two students spared with one another. "Moose, your right arm is 3 mm to low, and Akane, you should have noticed the flaw in his stance and taken advantage of it." 

The short haired girl gritted her teeth as she flickered to the blind boy's right. Sweeping with her left Akane tried to knock the Chinese magician off his feet only to find that he had lost his balance and stumbled out of her reach. "You try hitting him with 23 kilo's strapped to your wrists and ankles."

"Moose, how much weight do you have on you right now?" the pig tailed boy asked.

"How much weight do I have stashed," Moose asked as he swayed into a left backfist, "or how much weight am carrying?"

"Stashed or carrying?" Akane asked as she brought up her left forearm up to block the punch, followed by an open palm strike to the bridge to the Chinese boy's nose.

"Better, Akane," Ranma said, "Both Moose, and watch that arm, it was low again."

Moose rubbed the bridge of his nose, thankful for once that he was not wearing his glasses. "909.1 kilo's stashed, but I'm only carrying 91."

"Ok, I'm confused," the short haired girl said dropping her defense.

The blind boy slipped inside the fianc's stance and pushed her to the floor with his forearm. "You're supposed to be, that's the point. Hidden Weapons style is a Mental art more than a Martial art. The point is to use your opponent's confusion against him…or her." Reaching down he grabbed Akane's hand and pulled her to his feet. "At any given time I can have up to 1,000 kilos stashed on my person. However, the technique I use to hide the objects reduces the weight that I carry by one tenth."

"How do you do it?" the youngest Tendo asked.

Moose looked at Ranma, normally secrets of that sort were closely guarded by practitioners of the art, but sometimes alliances required acts of trust. But in this case there was something else to consider. Ranma shrugged, "It's ok, I want her to understand how she does it."

"You are the one who has to live with her Soatome."

"She doesn't use it nearly as often as most people think."

"Use what?" Akane asked.

"Your mallet." Ranma said.

"Oh," Akane said, "I still do not understand."

"Then, Tendo Akane, allow me to show you," Moose said as he took off his white robe. Wearing nothing but his black trousers he stepped towards the center of the dojo floor so that he faced the short haired girl. "Hidden Weapon's Ultimate Confusion Attack!" the magician said.

Akane instinctively pulled back in fear as the Magician pulled a yellow rubber duck from behind his back, and squeezed it in her face. "Squeak."

The short haired girl opened her eyes and glared at her sparing partner. "The Ultimate Attack is a rubber duck?"

"You are confused are you not?"

Instinctively she reached behind her back and pulled out her mallet. "Die, you stupid duck-boy!" she screamed only to have Ranma stop her arm mid-swing.

"You were right she does use the same technique," Moose said with a whistle.

"You mean my mallet is a hidden weapon's technique?"

"Not quite, Tendo Akane." the magician said. Producing a blackboard and some chalk from the space behind his back the duck-boy began drawing a diagram. "Are the two of you familiar with the Amazonian idea of the elements?"

Ranma nodded, "The old ghoul taught me when she trapped me in my girl form, but I don't think Akane was there at the time."

Akane jabbed her fiance in the ribs. "I thought we agreed, no secrets."

"We did," the pig -tailed boy said, nursing his side, "It just didn't seem that important."

"It's not," Moose said, "but it does help to explain allot about chi. Tell me Miss Tendo, what do you know about the western idea of the elements."

"It's a quartered circle with each division representing fire, earth, water and wind. With each element being separate, but part of a whole."

"Good, now what if I told you that my tribe thought of the elements as a continuous line divided into segments?" the blind boy asked pointing at his drawing. "With earth, water, air and fire forming a continuum between order and chaos. Now, what if I told you that people with an affinity for one type of element, could manipulate adjacent elements to a lesser extent?"

"Then the fact that I draw my mallet the same way you draw your weapons means that you have an affinity for an element adjacent to mine." the short haired girl said, "which would make you Air." The two boys stifled a laugh, causing the girl to glare. "What?"

"Chaos and Order an elements too," the Chinese magician said.

Ranma nudged his fiance in the ribs, "Why else would I teach him drunken boxing?"

* * *

Ukyo walked into the kitchen in desperate need of her morning cup of coffee. Fumbling around the kitchen she searched the countertops with one half opened eye. "It's three steps to your right." 

"Thanks Ryo-chan," Ukyo said as her hand found the coffee pot. The use of such a familiar term drew a frown from the other biological female in the room.

"So," Ryoga said, glancing nervously at his girlfriend and the girl he might be falling in love with, "How's Konastu doing?"

Akari brightened at the sound of a familiar name, "Yes, how is Konastu?"

"How do you know Konastu?" Ryoga asked.

"She was the nice girl who told…me…about…you," The farm girl stopped under the weight of her boyfriend's glare. Ryoga was gripping the countertop hard enough to leave palm prints in the laminate.

Ukyo shrugged as she took her first drink of coffee. "Let's see…I told him I loved him like a brother, and nothing more. He cursed me out, yelled that he was going to the bar, left out the back door, and came back four hours later so drunk I had to carry him to your room Ryo-chan."

"Sounds like he took it like a man," the pig-boy laughed.

"It's not funny," Ukyo sighed, "He burned all of his kimono's."

"Wait, Ryoga-kune," Akari said, making sure to stress kune to show familiarity. "Konastu is a he?"

The use of the familiar term made Ukyo notice the other girl for the first time. "Hey, Ryo-chan, I didn't realize you had company," Ukyo said as she walked over to the Counter, her coffee cup in one hand, the coffee pot in the other. "I'm Ukyo. I'm the owner of Uc-chan's."

"Hi, I'm Akari," the farm girl said with a smile, "I'm Ryoga-kune's fiance."

"Oh," Ukyo said, forcing her lips into a strained smile as she dumped the remainder of to coffee in the pot in Ryoga's lap.

* * *

Nabiki did not walk down stares until five minutes after her father left for his city council meeting. "Oh, my word, Nabiki," Nodal said as the middle child walked into the kitchen, "You are looking very…collegiate today." 

"Oh, my," Kasumi said, "Do all your clothes have…"

"Tokyo U's logo on them?" Nabiki finished. "Down to the bra and panties."

"May I ask why?" Nadoka asked as she took a sip from her morning tea, letting he cup hide her smile. She was doing her best not to laugh.

"Because daddy took it upon himself to donate my clothes to the pervert's collection," Nabiki said, sitting down. "And now I have nothing left to wear but this thing."

"But, Nabiki," Kasumi said no longer able to contain her mirth, "you look so cute in a cheerleader outfit."

* * *

To say that Shampoo was not taking this well would be a frightening understatement. The girl had not slept in almost four days. The only thing that kept her going was a combination of herbs, ginseng tea, and the grim realization that this time the only way she would retain her honor would be if she killed the kitchen destroyer. This is not to say that she was delusional. She knew now that her death would follow Akane's by the span of only a few heartbeats. Which is why she planed on attacking at the wedding, there was no need in delaying the inevitable. 

"So you still plan on doing this," an old voice said from behind her.

It's not as though I've been given any other choice, the girl said in her native language, to exhausted to use any other.

"There is always another choice, little one," the elder said softly. "We just don't always find it appealing."

I will not tie myself to a man who does not deserve me.

"Shampoo you are being unreasonable about this."

I am not the one who made an unreasonable law, the pink haired girl glared at her great-grandmother. Hate burned through her unkempt features.

"At the time those laws were necessary to ensure the survival of our tribe," the elder said, looking away from the shattered warrior before her. "Why can you not set this aside for the good of the tribe?"

The girl laughed, And where was the tribe when the man I loved chose another? The girl stood to her feet and walked towards the stairs. Pausing at the landing she turned, If you can tell me why my giving up on Ranma is in the village's best interest I might stop as you requested.

"I'm sorry child." the elder said, turning back towards the kitchen, "It's to early to reveal my hand in this."

Then I guess I must deny your request, the pink haired girl said as she continued up the stairs.

* * *

It is hard for a champion sumo pig to sneak anywhere. Especially when a champion sumo pig is forced to take mass transit. 

It was insulting really. His girl had ridden him every where that she had ever gone for the past seventeen years. Then the boy with the fists of stone had come. First his girl asked him to strike her. Then she would venture off without him for an evening or an afternoon. But this was different. She had been gone for days, and she had not taken him with her. His girl was slipping away, and there did not seem to be anything be could do about it.

He had been forced to take three trains today. Tracking someone in the train stations was next to impossible. The crowded spaces were filled with the scents of thousands of men and women as they packed together for the daily commute. When you added the cigarette smoke the task became truly difficult. It had taken several days, but he had rediscovered her scent in the Nerima district. Now he was getting close, her sent had been getting stronger.

She was so close he could almost see her, carrying a stack of dishes across the doorway to the restaurant across the street.

* * *

Ryoga stood in the six way mirror, as the taylor made a hand-full of last minute adjustments. "Laugh it up, Ranma, it is not that funny." 

"Not from where I'm sitting, Ryoga." Ranma said from the waiting room, "Its down right hilarious."

"Nice to know my misery is so damn entertaining."

"Don't get me wrong," Ranma said, "Your predicament is entertainment gold, real Miasaki material. But I'm just glad it's not me for a change."

"Very funny, Casanova," Ryoga said as he tugged it the yellow bow-tie. "Come on, you're the expert. How am I supposed to handle this? Who should I choose?"

"Do you know which one you love?"

The pig boy blushed. "Well, that's the trouble, Akari is so sweet and loving, but the thing is, I am beginning to think she is more in love with my curse than with me. And Ukyo, she can be so scary at times, but there are times when she just needs someone, and I like to feel needed."

"But which one do you want to spend the rest of your life with?" Ranma asked.

"How the hell am I supposed to know some thing like that?"

"I'll take that as an I don't know then."

Ryoga blushed again, "Yeah…"

"Then let me give you some advice. Don't pick one till your absolutely sure that you love her."

"That is so like you," Ryoga said. Pulling the tie's slipknot loose the pig-boy removed the contraption from his neck as the attendant left the mirrored stall to get a cap and gloves. "I hate these things. Why do they never go on strait?"

Ranma sighed, "Ryoga, which would be worse, stringing two girls along, or marrying the wrong girl and making her miserable for the rest of her life?"

"Wait I thought you always liked Akane?" the pig boys hands stopped for a moment, then continued to wrestle with the tie.

"I did, but Shampoo was just so sensual, if not possessive, and Ukyo was a good friend, who could be a bit scary at times with her obsessions…"

"She's not scary," Ryoga muttered, "She's a macho, anal retentive tightwad who jumps to conclusions without talking to someone first."

Ranma laughed, "And Akane was an un-cute, temperamental tomboy who was as stubborn as a mule and three times as strong. And if I would have rushed to Shampoo or Uc-chan, we would both be miserable right now."

Ryoga dropped his hands in frustration, as the tie fell out of its bow for the sixth time, swallowing his pride he asked, "Ranma, could I have some help with this tie?"

"I told you you should have gotten a clip-on."

* * *

Nabiki sat across the table from the Blue Thunder and smiled as she twirled her linguine with her fork. Across the table, Kuno played with the kill of near and cheese on his plate. "Kuno-baby, you really should try the veal. I hear that it is wonderful." 

Kuno placed his fork on his plate, "Its not the cuisine that dulls my appetite, its the company."

"Kuno-baby, you always say the sweetest things," the Mercenary girl said, raising an eyebrow. "That's why I love it when you take me to places like this."

The Blue Thunder glanced over at the manila envelope at the girl's side, "It is not as though I had any choice."

"I had to find some way to thank you for buying my new wardrobe."

"Well, as…interesting as your outfits were, I could not abandon anyone who found themselves at the mercy of a deranged parent. Not even one such as yourself," Kuno said as he rested on his elbow.

Nabiki sighed. Why did all of their outings have to end like this? It was not as though hey did not do this often. He was her biggest client after all. "Then for my sake I should be glad that chivalry is not dead."

Kuno gave a small smile in concession, "Not dead, merely at rest till the pendulum swings this way again."

"Speaking of old fashioned values," Nabiki said dabbing her mouth with her napkin, "how is your sister these days?"

"Tied up and heavily sedated." Kuno said, leaning back in her chair, "and has been since our house servant informed her of the impending ceremony between your sister the beau…Tendo Akane and the foul sorc…her fiancè."

"You've been practicing." the middle Tendo said cupping her chin with her hands. "I'm proud."

"Its not as though you give me any choice." the would be samurai said, nodding at the envelope on the table.

Nabiki's hand instinctively covered the package, "No, Kuno-baby. I don't."

* * *

Ranma-chan and Ryoga walked down the sidewalk as an impromptu shower fell from a cloudless sky. "Tell me again why you used the breaking-point at the rental shop?" Ranma-chan asked as she shivered uncontrollably. 

"I couldn't find my way to where you were."

"You were in a closest. I was standing right outside the door."

"I got lost, ok?"

"You were in a closet."

"I couldn't tell which me was me, and which were reflections."

"Fine, but did you a have to demolish the wall that had the water-main?"

"I said I was sorry."

"And why are you not a pig?"

"Waterproof soap, I picked up a batch for your wedding gift." Ryoga said as the red-head by his side grumbled under his breath.

* * *

"It's not a phase,"Ukyo said as she tried to tie the yellow ribbon behind her back. "I really hate boys." 

"God, you sound like me right after Ranma showed up on our doorstep," Akane said as she admired her train in the mirror. "This isn't too long is it?"

"You look fine" the Chef said, "and its not just like when you met Ranma. Konastu is not the boy of our dreams."

"What about Ryoga?"

"He's taken." Ukyo said, "I don't chase boys who are taken."

"Since when?" the short haired girl said.

"Since you told me you were marrying my fiancèe last week," the cute one said rolling her eyes. "Besides, on you believe the nerve of that…that Casanova. He didn't even bother to tell me about that pink haired hussy till he had been living with one for over a month."

"Shampoo?"

"No, Akari. Haven't you been listening?"

"Ok, now I know you are jealous."

"I am not," the long haired girl said.

"Please, Ukyo. That girl is the closest thing to a living saint in the world today and you know it." Akane said rolling her eyes.

"So says the girl who picked yellow for her bridesmaid dress," Ukyo said sticking out her tongue.

"I cannot help it that I look good in yellow," the short haired girl replied. "Besides, yellow is Ryoga's favorite color."

Ukyo blushed and tied the ribbon in a perfect bow.

* * *

Konastu sat down at the bar and downed a shot of Kailua. With a slightly wobbly hand he reached out and placed the glass on top of a medium sized shot-glass pyramid. The pyramid did not fall. That was good. "Hey," the bartender asked from across the bar,"don't you think you've had enough of those?" 

"I am not stopping till I knock the glasses over," the male kunochi said as he motioned for another glass. "Besides, Kailua is like Root-beer, there's hardly any alcohol in it."

"What's got you all riled up tonight?" the bartender asked, polishing a glass. "That cook again?"

Konastu waved his hands in exasperation, "I wish…Its a new girl."

"Oh?"

"I am standing next to the tables near the customer entrance…You know, getting them clean and all, when I feel this threatening thing behind me."

"You saw something then?"

"No, danger sense, something different. But, anyway…I feel this thing, behind me trying to run me down or something. So I wait I wait till the thing's about to just trample me, and I raise my fist up and just, BAM!"

"Bam" the bartender asked, suppressing a smile.

"No, no…BAM! " the once female ninja said, rotating his arm to the space between his head and the outside of his shoulder in demonstration. "So, I hit this thing, and it turns out to be a pig."

"A pig?" the bartender asked, looking down at the shot glasses.

"Not just a pig, a sumo-pig."

"A sumo-pig…"

"A sumo-pig," Konastu repeated, "So there I am, with this sumo-pig knocked out cold at my feet when the new waitress…"

"The one engaged to the busboy?"

"Yeah, that's the one, she starts crying. It turns out that this pig is her pet or something. So, she's just starts balling like all get-out, when she turns to me and screams 'You're ruining everything!' And she punches me in the jaw and runs off. I swear, if its not one thing its another."

The bartender pulled a new bottle from under the bar, and poured the brownish-black liquid into another glass, and handed it to the boy. "Maybe you should try something a bit stronger." Konastu paused for a second and took the drink. It was very good.

* * *

The Amazon warrior sat on the roof of the cat-cafe and watched the moon rise over the city. The air held the sweet sent of jasmine from the community garden next door. It was funny really, she had never noticed the sweet smell of the herbs. Tonight she just sat allowing herself to become intoxicated on the fragrence. Strange, how the small things become important when you know that you will not be able to enjoy them anymore. 

Cologne tells me that you are going to go through with this, a familiar voice said from behind her.

Do not try to talk me out of this Moose, Shampoo said without looking back. Just this once she wanted to pretend that he was talking to her, and not to some other object. I'm not going to change my mind.

Moose sat down next to the girl on the roof, Your mind is made up, I couldn't stop you if I wanted to.

Then why did you come here?

Moose, shrugged, Wishful thinking I guess. I had hoped that the elder had been able to convince you otherwise.

The warrior laughed, She tried to sell me a line about how it was in the village's best interest if I would just accept defeat.

You didn't bite then? there was a hint of disappointment in the duck-boy's voice.

Shampoo bit her bottom lip, You are not here to talk me out of it?

No, I am not.

Then why are you here Moose? the pink haired girl asked.

I wanted to be in your company one last time as your friend, before we meet tomorrow as enemies.

Shampoo smiled, Thank you, Moose.

The two teenagers said nothing more. Instead they sat and watched the stars fall around them in silence.

* * *

Konastu walked into the restaurant drunk, for the fifth time that week. Ukyo-sama and Ryoga had stopped talking, and that was good. But Ukyo-sama was now glaring at Akari-sama when she thought no one was looking, and that was very bad. It upset Akari, and that was very bad. Worse, he cared that it hurt Akari, and that was very, very bad. Confusing, but definitely bad. But Konastu knew he had to concentrate on Ukyo-sama. And he knew what Ukyo-sama needed to make her forget about Ryoga, and he was the only one who could give it to her. And that was very good 

She was standing in the dining area, ponytail swishing back and forth as she swept the floor. Her hips swayed back and forth in that beautiful rhythm only women could manage. The girl hummed softly to her self as Konastu walked up behind her, grabbed her shoulders, spun her towards him, and kissed her. It was good.

"Wow, Konastu, I did not know you felt like that," Akari said as he finished.

"Akari," Konastu said, as he backed away, "I'm sorry. You were wearing Ukyo's clothes and so I thought you…"

Akari's right hand balled into a fist as she grabbed Konastu's shirt with her left. With a practiced punch she popped the boy in the nose, knocking him to his knees.

"Baka," she said as she stormed out of the room.


	8. Chapter 8

Ranma: A Wedding Chapter 8

"Swallow your pride, Make way for the new bride. Hold in your tongue While they call another winner."

-Tonic, Mr. Goldendeal

Akane sat at the dresser and glanced at her wedding gown. "Akane, what's wrong?" Kasumi asked as she pinned the skirt for a last minute alteration.

"Nothing's wrong, what makes you think something is wrong?"

"Gee, sis," Nabiki said over the top of the financial section. "that's just the eight time you've glanced at that dress in the last sixty seconds …ninth. It's not like the sky is just going to fall down on you."

"Oh, really?" the youngest of the sisters asked. "What about last time? How do know that the insanity that follows Ranma and I won't just show up again today?"

"Don't worry child," a wizened old voice said from the window ledge behind her, "insanity will walk with the two of you for the rest of your days. But maybe this time it can work in your favor."

Akane stood to her feet and shifted to a ready stance, placing herself between her sisters and the Amazon Elder. "what do you want Cologne?" she asked warily.

The old ghoul laughed, "So, Moose was right, Ranma has been training you. But your back foot is to far forward by 10 mm."

"Dammit," Akane said, moving her foot the required amount, "Is every one going to correct me?"

"Just until you get it right," the elder said.

Nabiki smirked, "So you're not here to kill her then?"

"If I did that she would never improve," the old woman cackled. "Besides, what kind of woman would kill a girl on the eve of her wedding? That would just be heinous. Now really. What do you take me for?"

"A dried up mummy?"

"Nabiki, that's no way to refer to your elders," Kasumi said, "It's Mummy-san."

Akane glanced around the room for any other threats, "Then if you're not here to kill me and you don't want to stop the wedding. Why are you here?"

"I am here because it has come to my attention that you are in dire need of feminine guidance."

"I'm not sharing Ranma."

"I did not ask you to."

"I think my sister just wants to make herself clear as to the terms of your surrender," Nabiki said, moving between her younger sister and the amazon. "So back to the negotiation…define feminine guidance."

Kasumi's eyes narrowed into slits, "Are you trying to say that I did not do an adequate job of raising my sisters?"

"No, Kasumi dear," Nadoka said from the door, "I believe that she is only trying to state that you three girls have been without a mother for a while now."

Cologne nodded, "A family without a matriarch is like a ship with no rudder, while there may be movement there is no direction. If you would have me I would correct this situation."

"You want to adopt us?" Nabiki asked.

* * *

Ukyo could not help but stare at Ryoga as he sat on the steps of the dojo in his tux. A smile crept over her lips as she pictured her wedding day; his eyes locked on her as she marched down the isle. But those eyes would never belong to her, they were Akari's, and if she allowed herself to imagine any other scenario, she would just be kidding herself. She had done that for far to long already.

"Shouldn't you be getting dressed now?" Ryoga asked as he looked up at her from across the yard. "Geez, I swear you put everything off till the last minute."

The chef stuck out her tongue and pulled down her eyelid, "All I have to do is crawl into a dress, I don't have to wear a monkey suit like you."

"You know how to wear a dress?"

"Of course I know how to wear a dress," Ukyo said, placing her hands on her hips, "I am a girl, jackass."

"Could have fooled me," Ryoga said, placing his hinds in his pockets. "So when am I going to see you in this mythical dress?"

"Oh no, I know what you're doing and its not going to work."

"What?"

"You're not getting we into that contraption one second before I have to," Ukyo said.

Ryoga sighed, "Please, I bet you don't even wear a dress on your wedding day."

"It's not like that's ever going to happen now," the long haired girl said, her face darkening.

"Look, if it makes you feel any better I think Ranma choose the wrong one," Ryoga said, suddenly finding his feet interesting. "I would have chosen you."

"No, you chose Akari." Ukyo said, whirling around on her heels as she stomped back into the house.

* * *

"So, let me make sure I have this strait," Nabiki said, rubbing her temples, "in exchange for you allowing Ranma to marry my sister and annulling both the kiss of death and kiss of marriage, Akane has to join your clan."

"No, not just Akane, all three of you."

"I don't get it, why do you want all three of us?" Akane asked.

"Because my dear, the three of you would strengthen the village by offering skills that we have never had to develop before."

"What kind of skills?" Kasumi asked. "Marshal or Marital?"

"Neither," Cologne said, "and both. It is difficult to explain."

"Try," Nadoka said, "I want to hear this."

"Its embarrassing really. You would think that with our thousands of years of ancient knowledge we could handle it, but alas, we find ourselves ill prepared."

"For what?" Akane asked.

"For change," the old hag said, a sad smile creeping onto her face. "all of the wisdom we have held onto with the dogmatic tenacity of a fanatic, and the one thing that we forgot was that times change."

"I don't understand," Kasumi said.

"Shampoo," Akane said, pulling her pillow to her chest.

"Exactly. You understand," Cologne said.

"I still don't understand," Kasumi said.

"It's simple, sis," Nabiki said, "She knows. She knows that Ranma does not love her. She knows that he chose our sister, and she knows that if she hurts Akane in any way, he is going to kill her."

"My son would never…"

"Yes, he would, Auntie," Akane said, "He has before."

"The nightmares?" Nadoka asked leaning against the foot-board. Akane nodded.

"The girl has decided that she would rather die than live without Ranma." the Amazon elder said. "Unfortunately there are many in the tribe who would support her decision."

"And we help in this how?" Nabiki asked.

"Well," the old woman said leaning against the windowpane, "I would gain three matrons for my family. One who would teach how to accept all situations with calm and grace. One who would show us how to transform our unique knowledge and skills into profit. And, one who would make sure we always did the right thing."

"What do we get out of this?" Akane asked. The elder opened her mouth to speak only to have Akane cut her off, "Other than Ranma."

"What do you want?"

"Teach me medicine," Kasumi said almost to quickly, drawing strange looks from the other women in the room.

"I want exclusive rights of first refusal for all Amazon business deals in Japan."

"Both of my sisters will have immunity to the kiss of marriage and the kiss of death," Akane added.

"Done," Cologne said.

* * *

Mouse stood on the roof of the dojo and waited for the pink haired girl to bound across the rooftops. Four hours. Four hours until Ranma and Akane walked the isle. Four hours till he had to save that goddamned bimbo from herself again.

"Coffee?" Soun asked, handing the boy a steaming mug.

"Thank you," the amazon said taking the mug, "but I thought you Japanese drank tea."

"Four years in the SDF and it's amazing what you develop a taste for," the older man said taking a sip from his coffee mug. "Well, don't look so surprised. I did have a life before Kasumi was born you know."

"I know that, but don't most Japanese hate the military?"

"Which is why I don't go around telling everyone I know about it. Besides, that's where I met my wife," Soun said.

"Next thing you are going to tell me is that she was your commanding officer," Mouse said, taking a draw from his coffee.

"No," Soun said, "she was his daughter."

Coffee spewed everywhere, "You dated your CO's daughter?"

"No, I was just her escort when she went shopping. She wanted some hot shot junior officer at the time," the older man said. His look of mirthful remorse made Mouse sad for some reason. "Some of the stunts she pulled to catch that bastard would make me so angry that I could not see strait. The things I did for that girl."

"So what happened?"

"I was a month short when she was finally successful, and for some reason I couldn't stand to see the two of them together," Soun took a breath, "So I asked to be reassigned to KP for my last two weeks so that I did not have to."

"Then how did you end up getting married?"

"The night before I got my discharge she bribed the night watchman and snuck into my room," Soun smiled as he finished the last of his coffee. "She got down on one knee and proposed to me. Go figure, had a ring and every thing…All that time and I never knew."

"Back home we do not exchange rings," Mouse frowned, and drew back his sleeve to reveal a faded scar on his left wrist, "we give a blood oath."

Soun sipped from his mug and said nothing, unsure of what to say. "You drew blood for her?"

"Many times," Mouse said, "Again today "

"I am sorry. I did not know."

"Its ok," the boy said, looking at a familiar rooftop in the distance. "This will be the last time."

"You are giving up?"

The Chinese boy looked away.

* * *

Ryoga opened what he hoped to be the front gate of the Tendou dojo. He thought he would be strong enough to sit through Ranma and Akane's wedding, but he was wrong. So, now more than any other time in his life, Ryoga wanted to be lost. Unfortunately his sense of direction had different ideas.

"Dammit, Ryoga, you jackass, this is the third time you've walked in on me in the last hour," Ukyo screamed, grabbing her bridesmaid's dress and holding it to cover her current state of undress. Cursing that she hid left her throwing spatulas at home, she picked up the nearest object and hurled it at the pig boy. "Get lost, and leave me the hell alone you two-timing pervert."

"That's what I'm trying to do you cross-dressing freak," Ryoga said as he stormed off.

* * *

Kuno walked into the courtyard of the dojo followed closely by Sasuki, who carried a bound and gagged Kodachi. "I was wondering how you were going to do it," Nabiki said, as she stepped out of the house to great the visitors. "I must say though, tying her to a pole like that was a nice touch, how did you manage it?"

"Valium," the servant said under his breath, "and copious amounts of sake."

"In that case, if you ever tire of working for the Kuno's, I always have needs for someone of your resources."

"I thank you, but my masters have always been more than generous with me," Sasuke replied, carting the wide eyed Kodachi into the dojo.

"To bad," Nabiki shrugged, "Did you bring the gift?"

"As you requested," Kuno said, handing over a parchment with his family's seal on it.

"What is it?"

"A writ allowing the…Ranma, and…his bride Legal council with my family's lawyers for services not to exceed three million yen."

Nabiki looked at the boy, slightly confused, "Isn't that the usual cost for the legal fees in a contested divorce?"

"It is? I had not noticed," the boy said stepping past the mercenary and into the dojo.

* * *

"Ryoga where are you?" Ranma called from inside the house.

"Out, here," the lost boy said from his perch on the from the front porch steps.

"What are you doing out here?" the pig-tailed boy asked as he stepped oil the front door.

"Better than being in there." Ryoga said his hand pointing in the general direction of the makeshift girls' dressing room.

"Heh, tell me about it, even mom…Geze, what the hell happened to your eye?"

"I accidentally walked in on Ukyo while she was dressing."

"What was that? You're mumbling."

"I said I walked in on Ukyo."

"Damn, man, what's wrong with you?" Ranma asked, "That girl is deadly with those spatulas of hers. You're lucky you got off as lightly as you did."

"She left them at home," Ryoga said as the bridegroom sat down next to him on the porch. "but, she didn't start aiming until the sixth time."

"You walked in on Ukyo six times?"

"I got lost."

Ranma gazed at the lost boy in disbelief, "Six?"

Ryoga turned towards the street and twiddled his thumbs, "Six."

"Six," Ranma said, shuddering as his mind attempted to reboot. Finally. coming to his senses, the groom reached into his coat and pulled out a small rectangular package. "Kasumi told me that according to western tradition I'm supposed to give you something for being the best man…So, here."

Ryoga took the gift, and gently pealed back the wrapper as not to tear it.

"Geze, Ryoga, you're opening it like a girl."

"Says the part-time girl," the pig-boy said as he pulled a small rectangular device from the paper. "Oh…What is it?"

"Its a satellite phone. The company said that it has an almost complete coverage around the globe."

"Ok, but why did you get me a phone?"

Ranma shrugged, "It was Akane's idea."

Ryoga nodded, "So what am I supposed to do with it?"

"The salesman put the Tendou's number in the phone. All you have to do is press star-one to call us. She told me to tell you that 'the next time you get lost to call us, and we will come get you.' But then you're to pig headed to do something like that."

"Ranma…" Ryoga growled as he slapped his rival in the back of the head. But then that was as close as Ranma ever came to affection. "Tell, Akane thanks for me."

"Sure."

* * *

Akari walked into the dojo, amazed at the number of guests that had arrived. Only a handful of seats remained empty.

"I knew this was going to be an event," Konastu said, "but I didn't realize it would be this crowded." Across the room, a lone seat on the bride's side of the isle beckoned. It was the perfect perch, close enough to Ukyo-sama that he could bask in the glow of glorious beauty, but at just the right angle so that his view of the groom and his groomsman would be obscured by Genna's rather large frame.

The farm girl started shaking slightly, and her hand reached out to steady herself on the ex-transvestite's sleeve as he moved to take his seat, "Don't leave."

Konastu looked down at the small callused hand. The feel of her delicate fingers on his sleeve caused his heart to skip a beat. The male kunochi swallowed, "Why?"

"I don't know very many people here."

"Just pick a place and sit," the boy shrugged as he moved towards the bride's side.

"Please, just this once," Akari said, tightening her grip on his arm. "It's just, I don't go anywhere without one of my pet's and well…its hard for me to be alone."

Konastu rolled his eyes, "Good lord, why didn't you bring one with you?"

"You can't bring a pig to a wedding."

"Why not? You bring a pig with you every where else you go. Why should a wedding be any different."

"You cannot, and I can prove it," Akari said, pulling aside the elderly woman who walked in behind than. "Excuse me, grandmother, is it acceptable to bring a pig to a wedding?"

"Well I don't…"

"See, I told you," Akari said with a smug smirk.

"Please," Konastu said, "Grandmother, if you invited a friend who brought a pet every where she went, would you ever expect her to leave it?"

"Look its not…"

"See I told you."

Cologne let out an exasperated sigh, and rapped the pair on the head with her staff. "What I was trying to say was that I don't get involved in lovers spats anymore I'm too old, and its too exhausting."

The elder shuffled by the unwilling couple as they rubbed their heads, leaving before they could protest being tabled as lovers. Things were winding down too quickly, a peaceful church a peaceful church, an amazon wedding an amazon wedding and a resolution to her great-granddaughter's predicament, all on the same day. Every thing was going to become boring again. But then there was one person But then there was one person here who always managed to keep things exciting. "Hello, Happy, may I sit here?"

Happosi said nothing, as the elder amazon took the seat next to him. The old man puffed on his pipe, as he gazed longingly at the alter. "You're not going to disrupt things, are you?" the elder asked.

"Bah," the wizened old pervert said with a dismissive wave of his pipe. "I would never do anything to disrupt the ceremony."

Cologne looked at Happosi, "I must say Ken, this is one of your better disguises."

"This isn't a disguise," the pervert answered,"and I'm hurt you would even think that I would do anything to disrupt this joyous occasion."

The amazon set in stunned silence, and then realized what had the old man entranced. "She's going to throw her wedding garter isn't she?"

The old man nodded.

* * *

The moment Ukyo stepped into the dojo's entrance, Akari knew that she had lost. At the other end of the isle Ranma elbowed his friend lightly in the ribs, "Hey, remember to breathe."

Ryoga sucked in a breath and shook his head clear as Ukyo took a ginger step down the isle. The dress was a hideous yellow. Not the muted utilitarian yellow that Ryoga usually wore because it hid the grind of life on the road, but instead the bright day glow yellow that burned the eyes when you looked at it to long. It was a dress that would look hideous on anyone. Except Ukyo.

The Chef caught the eye of the lost boy and blushed. He was looking at her with those eyes again. The ones she just wanted to fall into. Her mouth turned to a momentary frown, and Ryoga knew that her thoughts had turned sour. How dare he do this to her. After it had taken all of this time to finally get over Ranma, to get over the fact that her fiancee had chosen another. And Ryoga had to go and do the same thing to her, the bastard. Why did he have to choose Akari? The "cute one" scowled as she placed one foot in front of the other, forcing herself not to break and run as she marked time on the long march down the isle.

It was at times like these that Ukyo hated herself, the most. It should be her walking the isle, her long flowing dress capturing the attention of everyone in the room, especially her groom. He would have eyes only for her as he stood regally at the alter, as their hearts beat in synchronicity. But it wasn't like that. and it never would be.

Dammit, and she had just gotten over Ranma. She was happy for Akane. She really was. Then Ryoga had to hold her like that. The jackass must have thought the whole thing was a riot the way he had toyed with her emotions. And how dare he let her kiss him. It had to be his fault, there wasn't any other explanation.

As the look on Ukyo's face darkened Ranma began to mourn the loss of the peaceful wedding that he and Akane had dreamed of. But when his best friend settled into her place of honor across from his best man he allowed himself the luxury of giddy relief. He was not the target of her maleficent glare. Ranma was going to get married, and no one was going to stop the ceremony, not this time. The pianist struck a bright cord, and all eyes turned to the back of the room where the bride stood with her father.

"Hey, Ranma," Ryoga said as he bumped his rival's shoulder, "remember to breathe."

* * *

Mouse knew Shampoo had stepped onto the grounds long before he ever saw her. The soft pad of her slippers on the grass and the sent of her soap on the air signaled her presence as she jumped over the wall. "Shampoo, I can't let you do this."

Shampoo nodded as she pulled her short swords from their holsters, "Then Moose obstacle."


	9. Chapter 9

Ranma 1/2: A Wedding.

Chapter 9

"Maybe I'm just blind."

-3 doors down, When I'm gone.

Shampoo kicked Mousse through the dojo's entry causing Akane's smile to fade as she stood facing Ranma at the alter. "Akane," the girl said, her eyes were bloodshot and black from the lack of sleep, "you I kill."

"For the record, Ranma this is all your fault." the short haired girl said as her hand clamped down on the minister's sleeve.

"Maybe we should try this some other time," the minister said, trying to free himself from the girl's vice like grip, "when things are a bit less violent."

"Like that will ever happen," Nabiki said, drawing a hostile glare from Nadoka.

Mousse stood to his feet and shifted into a ready stance. The blind boy motioned for the Amazon maiden to attack. "Your kicks are not as strong as they used to be. You've gotten weaker, no wonder Ranma chose another."

Shampoo seethed in anger. Her lips foaming as she surged forward, swords whirling around her seeking Mousse's neck.

The strikes never landed. Shampoo found them caught in the prongs of a main-gauche, snapping as a firm twist of the males wrists snapped the blades in two. "Step away, Shampoo, please don't make me hurt you."

The warrior let the now useless hilts drop to the floor as she flowed underneath the boys reach, a back kick connecting with his chin knocking him back to the floor. "Obstacle."

Akane's aura flickered red as she pulled the minister closer. "Look I don't care how dangerous things are, or whether you get killed in the process. No one is leaving this alter till I get married."

"But we don't have enough time," the priest pleaded.

"Then do the short version," Ryoga said, positioning himself between the bride and the maddened Amazon.

"The short version," the minister gaped, "but we only do that in instances of certain death!"

"Whet do you think this is?" Ukyo asked, as she stepped into position next to Ryoga.

"Fine," the minister huffed, "how do you even know about the short version?"

"Just get on with it!" Genma shouted.

"Please," Akane said, "please."

"Alright ," the minister said opening his bible. "Do you have the rings?"

"They're right here." Cologne said, handing the rings to the bride.

"You realize that when she finishes with him we're next." Ukyo said as she readied herself for the assault. Ryoga nodded and clinched his fists.

Mousse staggered to his feet. His knees wobbled as he fought to regain his senses. One more solid blow and Shampoo could move on to her intended target. Whirling to her right the Amazon lashed out in a spinning back kick. There was no need to hunt the duck boy more than was necessary, this fight would end just like even, other fight between them.

"Grab your rings and put them on your fingers." the minister said. His foot tapped with impatience as he waited for the couple to comply.

"Ok," Ranma said when the rings were on he right fingers. "Now what?"

"Do you?" the minister asked the groom.

The pig-tailed boy looked at the minister not understanding what he meant. It was not until he felt the bite of Akane's heel in his foot that he understood what his answer was supposed to be. "Yes."

"Do you?" the minister asked the short haired girl.

"Yes."

"You are. Now kiss her."

For once Ranma did not have to wait for further clarification.

Mousse staggered backwards moving himself just out of Shampoo's reach. Of all the times for dumb luck, Shampoo thought as her foot brushed past the tip of the duck boys nose. It wasn't until she saw the gleam in the male's eyes, and felt the thud of an iron staff against her temple that she realized her mistake. Slipping from consciousness the girl felt her legs give out under her as she fell to the floor.

It took a second for everyone to realize that it had happened. That after all of this time, it had finally happened. Ranma and Akane were marred. The universe stopped, and did a gestalt flip. It was time for a fundamental change.

The pig tailed boy broke off the kiss and looked down at his bride in wonder, "I love you." It was amazing how easy those three words were to say. They rolled off the tongue, and tasted like honey in his mouth. He wanted to savor the words again, "I love you."

"I love you too," Akane said, leaning into her husband's chest, "but what about Shampoo?"

Ranma sighed. Letting go of his wife he stepped past Ryoga and Ukyo, and walked to the middle of the isle, where Shampoo had fallen to a heap on the floor. "Mousse, are you ok?"

"No," Mousse said as he walked past the prone girl and to the dojo's door.

"So, what now?" Akane asked.

"I don't know," the blind boy said, as he stepped into the sunlight. "I don't know."

Bellow them the amazon began to stir, prompting her great-grandmother to check on her well being. The matriarch tapped the girl lightly waking her from her stupor. Come girl, she said, you have fulfilled your duty today. You can return home with your honor intact.

She's dead?

No, the elder said with a smile.

Then how? the pink haired girl asked as she used a chair to pull herself up.

No two amazon's can be married to the same man, the elder said quoting the law.

But Akane isn't an Amazon. Outsiders can only join through adopt… Shampoo turned white.

Technically she would be your great-aunt. I'm sorry. I tried to warn you.

Bullshit.

The elder sighed, I deserved that. But you have a new problem. What are you going to do about your latest defeat?

My… Shampoo paused, "Mousse?"

All color left the blind boy's face as Cologne nodded. "Mousse."

The amazon let out a soft sigh as she stood to her feet. Letting her hips sway hypnotically she walked over to the paralyzed boy and gently wrapped her arms around him. "Wo ai..."

Mousse threw the girl to the floor, a look of horror on his face. "Not like this," he said, fighting the tears threatening to fall from his eyes. "I never wanted to win you like this."

Shampoo sat and watched mutely as her new husband ran to the pond, taking flight as the water triggered his curse.

"Well," the minister said, breaking the spell of silence that had descended on the room, "Who else needs a drink?"

* * *

Nabiki stood at the gate and waited as the Kuno siblings exited the dojo. While Kodachi had writhed against the ropes that restrained her in anger and angst, Kuno remained stoic. It was amazing how effective blackmail could be.

"That was an interesting ceremony." the samurai said as he stepped past the mercenary and out of the Tendou home. "Almost worth the price of admission."

"Thank you, Kuno-baby." Nabiki said with a mock bow. "I do my best to entertain."

"You do your best to bleed me dry."

"Tachi, I'm hurt you think that. Now you remember the second part of our agreement?"

"Don't worry Mistress," Satsuki said as he rolled Kodachi out the door in the Tendou's wheelbarrow. "I recorded every moment of the wedding."

"Just make sure the girl watches the video until she understands that my sister and her Ranma-darling are husband and wife."

"And when we're finished you will destroy your records?" Kuno asked.

Nabiki smiled, "I'll think about it."

* * *

Akane was carefully making her way from the house to the dojo when she noticed the maid-of-honor creeping towards the side gate. "Ukyo, wait!" the short haired girl yelled as she kicked off her heels and ran across the grass, the long train of her wedding gown trailing behind her. "You are leaving already?"

"Yeah," Ukyo said, looking down at her restless feet. "I have to get the cafe reopened in time for dinner."

"Are you sure you cannot stay?" Akane asked, concern heavy in her voice, "He is going to notice, you know."

"I know, but I just can't," the chef said, "you understand, right?"

"What should I tell him then?"

"Could you make something up?"

Akane nodded, prompting Ukyo to turn away. "Hey, Ukyo?"

"Yes Akane?"

"I just wanted you to know I really enjoyed this past week."

"Me too," the chef said.

"Do you think we can still be friends?"

Ukyo smiled, as she walked out the gate, "I think I'd like that."

* * *

Ryoga shouldered his backpack and adjusted the straps as walked down the stairs. With any luck it would be a few months before he made it back to the Nerima area.

"Leaving by yourself?" Ranma asked.

Ryoga sighed, Ranma was one of the last people that Ryoga wanted to see right now. "Yes, I am."

"Do you want to get lost?"

The pig-boy looked at the floor.

"You're trying to get lost," Ranma said with a shake of his head. "Aren't you?"

"So what if I am?"

"Is it because of the wedding, or the girls?"

"Both, and neither. I think I need to just go walkabout for a while, just to clear my head."

"Walkabout?"

"Australian term, its north of Kyoto."

Ranma smiled, "If you say so. What should I tell the Ukyo?"

"Don't," Ryoga said as he disappeared out the front door.

* * *

Ranma and Akane stood at the gate of the Tendou compound patiently thanking the last of the guests as they left the wedding reception. It had been a long day, it was going to be a longer night, and neither the bride nor the groom could wait for very much longer. Things were quiet for a change. Happosi sat in the corner of the yard admiring the new prize of his collection. The minister lay sprawled out under a tree, curled up in a ball,shivering like a wet rabbit. He suffered from the type of drunk that came from a full bottle of saki. The only potential problems still present were a petite amazon elder and her pink haired charge. "Congratulations, son-in-law," Cologne said with a half smile.

"You can't call re that anymore, old-ghoul," the pig-tailed boy said with a feral smile, his arm around hisI wife protectively "I'm already taken."

"Son-in-law, do you remember how I told you you would make a great addition to the tribe?"

Akane bit her tongue as Ranma nodded mutely.

"And you know how I want to get you, whether by crook or hook?"

"So what's you're point, granny?"

"My point is Son-in- Law is this," the elder said through narrowed eyes, "Welcome to the tribe." Shampoo turned green as Ranma looked at the elder in confusion. Cologne laughed, "I think you and you're wife have something to discuss. Come child let's leave these two alone."

Shampoo followed the elder out of the dojo, her eyes never rising to meet those of the newlyweds. "Shampoo, I'm sorry." Akane said as the girl walked away. The amazon walked out of the gate without saying a word.

"So what was that all about?" Ranma asked his wife after the pink-haired girl disappeared from sight. "It's almost as though she thought you were an amazon or something."

"Well," Akane said, "she promised that it would fix our problems with Shampoo."

"You didn't."

"Wo ai ni, Airen," the short-haired girl said with a sheepish grin.

* * *

Ryoga had been lost more times then he could count, but the problem was not that he did not know where he was going, he just did not know how to get there. For the first time in his life, Ryoga did not know where he was going, and that was liberating. The lost boy opened the door infront of him, not really caring where it went, instead loosing himself in the Zen of the journey.

"Ryoga?" Ukyo asked, one foot in the bathtub, one foot out.

The pig boy paused, words caught in his throat as he drank in the vision of the woman before him. "Yes, Ukyo?"

"Jackass!" Ukyo screamed as she hurled the empty wash bucket at the lost boy. "Why can't you just get lost?"

"I keep telling you," Ryoga said as he ducked back into the hallway, before the half-cocked girl found anything sharp to throw at him. "That's what I'm trying to do."

* * *

"Shampoo still no understand why Shampoo must stay at reception when Airen fly away before Shampoo kiss," the girl said following Cologne into the restaurant. "Shampoo no chase two husbands. Moose get down here now."

"Go to hell," the boy said from his room up stairs.

"Wonderful," Cologne muttered under her breath as she shuffled into the kitchen to find her cooking saki.

Don't make me go upstairs and drag your ass down here, the pink haired girl said in Chinese, her ears red with rage.

"You can't, remember, or do I have to knock you out again?"

"Shampoo no joke. Shampoo want…Damn this mongrel language. Mouse get down here so that we can talk about our wedding.

"No."

"Why not?"

"I'm packing."

"Good," Shampoo said, marching towards the stairs. "Mouse get ready for honeymoon. Shampoo join Airen."

The blind boy met the pink-haired girl halfway down the stairs. "Who said anything about a honeymoon?"

"Fine, we go strait to village," the girl said pushing past the boy as she walked up the stairs. "Shampoo worried for minute. Shampoo think Mousse not want to be Airen. Good to see Shampoo wrong."

"Who said I wanted to get married?" Mousse said with a swallow, his back to the girl.

"Mousse, don't be silly," Shampoo said, "Mousse always want Shampoo, now law say he win. Shampoo has to marry Mousse now. Shampoo have no other choice. What Mousse want."

"No, Shampoo, it's 'not what Mousse want.' I never wanted this."

"Mousse lie. Mousse do anything to trap Shampoo in marriage."

"Really," the boy said, the stairs thundering with each step he took, "then why did I show you your own reflection when you hatched out of the egg?"

"Mousse just being silly duck boy. Mousse thought it make Shampoo lone him. Shampoo not know why."

"Maybe I'm just blind." the boy said, pausing at the last step.

"No matter now," Shampoo sighed. "Law say Shampoo must marry."

"We are not getting married."

"Mousse silly. Shampoo follow law. Mousse follow law. Mousse Amazon."

Mousse laughed, "Maybe so, but I can fix that."

Shampoo laughed, "Please, Mousse no dare. Now Mousse go upstairs and prepare for trip like good husband. Yes?"

"No." Mousse said as he walked across the dining room towards the kitchen.

"Mousse, get back here."

The Amazon male opened the kitchen door and called out, "Hey old mummy, you there?"

Cologne stood at the cooktop, drinking her rice wine strait out of the bottle, "What now Mr. Part-timer?"

"I renounce my claim to the Tribe."

Cologne sighed, "Are You sure? Once you do this it cannot be undone."

"I want out," the boy said. "I will not be bound by your rules any longer."

Shampoo stormed into the kitchen, "Mousse no do this. Great- grandmother no let Mousse do this."

"Sorry, child," the elder said, as she set the bottle on the table, "the law is clear on this matter. As elder I must honor his request. As a male warrior, he has he right to independence."

"But law say Mousse Airen."

"Have you given the kiss of marriage?" the elder asked.

"No, but…"

"Then he has no ties to you," the elder said, taking a draw from the bottle. "But Mousse, you can only do this if you have your family's marker on you. Do you have it?"

"It's right here," the blind boy said reaching into his sleeves and pulling out a gold torc.

"Mousse, stop," Shampoo said, grabbing the boy by the shoulders and forcing him to look at her. "What Mousse doing? Why Mousse not just accept Shampoo is wife?"

"Because I will not live my life in a loveless marriage," Mousse said as he broke her grip. "Nor will I force you into one."

Dumbstruck Shampoo sank to the floor and watched helplessly as Mousse presented his torc to her grandmother.

"Are you sure you want to go through with this?" Cologne asked.

"Yes," Mousse said.

"Our heritage is a circle of knowledge passed down from Mother to daughter, Father to son. The loss of one member breaks the circle and ends the fellowship," the elder said. "Do you break the fellowship?"

Mousse set Fe tore down on the butcher block and drew a hatchet from his robes. The blade fell cleanly upon the torc, cutting the circle in two. "I break the fellowship."

Shampoo whimpered. "You are a stranger to us. Your name will be as chaff on the wind," the elder said.

"Thank you, old ghoul," Mousse said leaving the torc on the table. "I'm sorry I couldn't be more valuable in your eyes."

"You were always an interesting one child," Cologne said with a dismissive wave. "So where will you go?"

"I don't know," the boy said.

"Custom says that you have one week until your banishment. You should go home, and spend it with your family."

"Is that an order?" the boy asked as he turned towards the backdoor.

Cologne laughed, "No just the request of an old mother. Mousse, your life has always held a great value to the tribe."

"But not to the one who mattered most," the blind boy said as he walked out the door.

Shampoo cupped her head in her hands and cried, "No, it Shampoo who blind."


	10. Chapter 10

Ranma 1/2: A Wedding

"All we have to do now is take these lies and make them true somehow.\\

All we have to see is that I don't belong to you and you don't belong to me."

-George Michaels, _Freedom(1990)_

The early morning peace of the newlywed's wedding bed was broken by a scream from Nabiki's room. "Did she loose a bet?" Ranma asked as he kissed his wife's forehead.

Akane shifted her weight to make herself more comfortable in her husband's arms. "No that sounds more like Tokyo U. to me."

Ranma laughed, "Your father never gives up."

Akane looked up at her husband and smiled, "No, thankfully he doesn't."

* * *

Konastu sniffed the morning air and smiled, as the coffee dripped into the pot. "What has you in such a good mood this morning?" Akari asked as she shuffled into the kitchen wearing her pajamas.

"Coffee," the boy said, "the best thing about being a man."

"Whet does coffee have to do win being a man?"

"It's the quintessential man's drink..." Konastu said, "Followed closely by beer."

"Said who?" Akari asked.

"My instructor in all things manly," he said as he watched the dark liquid drip, drop, dribble into the pot below.

Akari razzberried, pushed past the boy, and grabbed a mug. Pulling the pot from the burner she poured herself a cup, letting the coffee hit the hot plate. The liquid cooked-off as she placed the pot back in it's place, filling the kitchen with the bitter smell of burned coffee. "Your instructor never lived on a farm."

Konastu looked at the girl in horror, "You heathen!"

"What?

"That was a Kenyan triple-roast."

Akari shrugged as she walked out of the room, "Tasted like Sanka to me."

* * *

Morning was demolished when Shampoo crashed through Akane's old bedroom wall, her breath coming in ragged draws. "Ranma," the Chinese girl said, narrowing her bloodshot eyes at the couple. ''You I kill."

The newlyweds rolled to opposite sides of the bed, splitting the sheet and quilt between. ''Shampoo," Ranma yelled red faced as his hands wavered between defending himself and protecting his modesty. "What in the hell are you doing here!"

"Shampoo loose Airen," the pink haired girl said, her bonbori crashing down into the center of the bed splintering the wooden frame. "Shampoo want backpay. Shampoo take out of Ranma's hide."

''Cologne told us that the adoption ended this," Akane said, wrapping the sheet around her body. "Sister's don't share husbands."

"Stupid kitchen destroyer not understand." Shampoo lifted the mace above his head. "Shampoo not care about stupid Ranma."

"Thank god," Ranma said from where he Icy cowering on the bedroom floor, "Wait, was that an insult?"

"Ranma fill Airen's head with silly thoughts. Airen leave Shampoo. Say he not want to force Shampoo into a no love marriage," the girl said, going limp on Ranma and Akane's wedding bed. "What wrong with Shampoo? Why no love for Shampoo?"

Akane said nothing instead placed her arms around her once rival's shoulders and held her as she sobbed.

* * *

Ryoga flinched as Ukyo leaned forward to push his hair back from the wound on his scalp. "Stop being a baby, I only grazed you with the spatula."

"It hurts," Ryoga said, flinching as her fingertips brushed by his wound sending a shiver down his spine.

"Don't be so melodramatic." She was close enough to feel his breath on her lips. The thought of his lips on hers flushed her cheeks, and reminded her why she was so angry with him. "It's not like I was trying to hurt you or anything."

"Then why did you use the sharp end?"

"You kept dodging when I tried to hit you with the flat."

"I was supposed to sit there and let you hit me?" Ryoga asked, as Ukyo dabbed a bit of alcohol onto his cut. The clear antiseptic burned and the chef was applying the clear liquid too liberally for Ryoga's tastes. "That hurts."

"Baby," Ukyo said with a crooked smile. "You break boulders with your bare hands, and you can't take a little alcohol."

Ryoga blushed, "Boulders don't burn. Besides, that hurt almost as much as a bullet."

Bullet... Ukyo paused, "Ryoga, how did you know about the short version?"

"What short version?"

"The short version at the wedding ceremony,"the girl said, sitting up again. "The one that was only used in life or death circumstances."

"How did you?"Ryoga said, smiling just enough to show the tips of his fangs as Ukyo scooted next to him. She frowned, he wasn't cute.

"I didn't," she said, her eyes narrowing. "At least not until you demanded the minister use it."

The boy looked down at the floor. "I travel allot, remember?"

Ukyo rolled her eyes, "Every one knows that."

"Not every place is as nice as this one."

"Ok,"the girl said, nudging the pig-boy with her shoulder. "So what's that supposed to mean?"

"I wandered into Darfur," the lost-boys voice went flat.

"Oh," Ukyo said, catching the dark look in the boy's eyes. "What happened? If you don't mind me asking."

"I came across a village surrounded by gunmen, they all knew what was going to happen but I had no clue." Ryoga hoped that Uc-chan couldn't hear his voice break. "There was a couple there, about our age, they had been childhood sweethearts..."

"The short version?"

Ryoga nodded, "I volunteered to take his place among the rest of the men. Give them a chance to run together."

"What happened?" Ukyo asked, resting her head on her knee.

"The villagers had sticks, the militia had AK-47's and hand grenades. What do you think happened?"

"That bad?"

"I use the memory to fuel the Lion's Roar."

Ukyo sat for a moment, her thumbs suddenly interesting. "What happened to the couple?"

Ryoga stood up and walked away.

* * *

Flying by jet was the only way to travel, especially for a duck. It was faster. Your wings didn't hurt. And no-one ever thought that a duck in steerage was a stowaway. Unfortunately there was no flying into Amazon lands, the villages were so remote that there were no roads, much less airports. Further, when you were cursed to transform into a domesticated species of duck, flying was not an option. You were likely to end up on the dinner table. So Mousse found himself walking the final few miles of his trip.

Usually the trip home was a happy time when he could reminisce about his childhood in the places where he had spent his youth. Now everything reminded him of Shampoo. It was more then he could stand.

The hill he was climbing had been his and Shampoo's favorite place to play as children. They had spent long hours climbing in the branches of the old oak fighting off hoards of attacking monsters. Mousse allowed a sad smile to cross his lips. If only real life enemies could be felled as easily as those from a child's imagination. Ranma had been the one to teach him differently.

From it's roots flowed the spring that fed the stream where the two at them would swim on the dog days of the summer. She liked to go skinny dipping, and that's what had gotten them in trouble in the end. When she started ''developing" the elders decided that their relationship was improper for two who were not engaged, and so the boy began his series of ill-fated proposals. After all, how else could they remain best friends?

Shampoo never wanted that though. He knew that before he asked that next day. She wanted the handsome stranger who would lift her out of the cinders and take her to his castle far away. He wasn't a prince. He was the son of a farmer. It was hard to be blind and dashing at the same time. He never really stood a chance. Not after Ranma showed up.

When you love a girl that much eventually you should reach the point where you hate her, and all the pain she caused. It was inevitable. So why couldn't Mousse hate her? He wasn't sure. As he walked among his lucid memories of their childhood together he understood he never would. Which was why he couldn't go back... ever. This was his last trip home. The boy sighed as he reached the crest of the hill, the smell of the brook bellow reminding him of the girl he was running from.

Mousse put his glasses back on, and looked out over the valley. The sight of the village bellow caused his stomach to ripple with nausea as his thoughts were ripped from the pink haired girl. The valley was crisscrossed with trenches. Warriors scurried through the fields like ants, setting fire to the crops that could not be harvested in time. In the village square, boys and girls only a few years younger than himself were being drilled in precise ranks. There was no mistaking it, the village was going to war.

Mousse stood silent for a moment, and let the vision sink in. "So home and see my mother, my ass. The old Ghoul tricked me again."

* * *

"Ok, Ranma, what is it this time?" Ukyo asked from behind the counter. Her fingernails tapping against the hard acrylic surface as the newlyweds carried the broken Amazon into the restaurant.

''What, no 'Hey, Ranma! How about a free okonomiyaki?' 'Why yes Ukyo I would love to have one.'" the Pig-tailed boy said as they sat the pink haired girl down at the bar.

"Free meals are for members of the former-fiancee club only." Ukyo said rolling her eyes, "Boy's who are just friends have to buy their own. No freeloading."

"Wait," Ryoga said as he walked in from the kitchen carrying a vat of batter, "you make me free meals all the time."

Ukyo turned around and smiled sweetly at Ryoga, "Konastu?"

"Yes, Ukyo-sama," the boy said without looking up from the half cleaned table he was bussing.

"Remind me to start deducting Ryoga-kun's lunches from his paychecks."

"Yes, Ukyo-sama." Konastu placed the dirty dishes his the cart and pushed them towards the kitchen.

"Ryoga." Ranma said, "trust me, when they smile like that... Run."

Akari, Akane and Ukyo looked up at Ranma and smiled sweetly. "Is that so?" his wife asked.

"Shutting up now."

"Good boy," Akane said.

"So, Akane," Ukyo said with a genuine smile, "what can I make for you?"

"A vegetable special please," the short-haired girl said.

"Wait, why does she get one when I don't?"

Akane, shrugged, "Ex-fiancee club."

"But you're my wife."

"Why Akane ex-fiancee," Shampoo said.

"How many people are in this club anyway?" Ranma asked.

"I don't know, why don't you tell us?" Akane asked.

"I'm not the only one whose father gave him multiple engagements, or should I bring up how I learned anything goes dining?"

Akane just shrugged as Ukyo set her meal in front of her.

"Nice to know marriage hasn't changed your relationship. You want one too sugar?" Ukyo asked the third member of the club. "You look like you need it."

Shampoo nodded. "Thank you."

"So. Ranma," Ryoga asked, as he set a bin of vegetables on the counter, "Who kicked your ass this time?"

"Ryoga," Akari said, lightly popping the pig-boy on the back with a cleaning towel, "that wasn't very nice."

"No it wasn't," Ukyo said, "But he does have a point. Prince... Monster... Oni...Who do you need help with this time?"

Ranma waved his hands in the air in front of him. "Whoa. Not me this time I swear, the Mummy asked us to meet her here."

"Where is Mousse-san?" Konastu asked, noticing his absence for the first time. Shampoo started crying.

"That is what I wanted to talk to you about," Cologne said from behind them.

* * *

Nabiki stormed into the living-room carrying two black ledgers as she upturned everything in her path. ''What in the fuck do you think you're doing?"

"Playing Shogi," Soon said not taking his eyes off of the board.

"Don't look at me," Genma wrote on a sign, fearing the middle child's wrath more than he feared his friend's cheating. "I'm just a cute panda."

"That only works when you are a panda." The girl said. Her glare sent chills down Genma's spine forcing him to seek shelter under the table. "You froze my accounts. What gives you the right..."

"I am your father, and you have not reached your majority," Soun said, turning to face his daughter, "And to tell you the truth, I should have done this years ago. All of that money gave you the idea that you could ignore my wishes and fly off to whenever it is that you want to go without my consent."

"Give me my money back," she said, her steel voice slicing through her father's resolve.

"I can't," her father stammered.

"Why not?"

"I spent it?"

"On what?"

"Tuition?"

"You spent 10,000,000¥ on tuition?"

"Well, I did pay for the whole 4 years."

"Why in the hell would you do something like that?"

"Because I told you that you were going to Tokyo U, and you are going whether you like it or not. Like an obedient daughter should."

Nabiki smiled and shoved the ledgers into her father's hands, "I'm not the obedient one, remember?"

"What's this?" Soun asked as his daughter as she stormed away.

"The dojo's finances," the girl said, " I'm not doing them anymore."

The two men cowered at the table until they heard the girl slam the front door closed. "That went well," Genma said as he quickly rearranged the game board.

* * *

"Ok, we get that you want our help, but why do you need all of us just to find Mousse?" Akane asked.

''Because child," the elder said from her perch near the counter, "home is not the same as it used to be."

"What is that supposed to mean?" Ryoga asked.

"I'm not sure," the elder said, taking a draw from her pipe. "The government thinks the area is in an open state of rebellion. And while it is highly unlikely that the tribe would do something so foolish, Beijing isn't taking any chances."

"Well, if the Amazon's aren't doing anything wrong then there shouldn't be any problems, right?" Akari asked from her perch between Ryoga end Konastu.

Shampoo frowned and muttered something under her breath that sounded suspiciously like Tiananmen. Cologne set her pipe on the counter and stared at the floor. "They are going to scatter the tribes."

''Genocide?" Ukyo asked, her eyes not leaving Ryoga's silent form. Cologne nodded.

Shampoo slapped her grandmother knocking her off of her staff. "How could Great-grandmother? Great-grandmother sent Airen to die."

"I am sorry, child," the old woman said, picking herself off of the floor, "but what I do is for the survival of the tribe. Everything else is secondary. Law, marriage, love, family, life... Everything."

"So what do you need?" Ryoga asked.

"I've been given one month to end this rebellion, before the army is sent in," the elder said, ignoring her granddaughter as the girl shook with rage. "As elder, I am marshaling all available warriors of our tribe to come with me."

"I knew there was a catch," Ranma said.

Akane ground Ranma's foot with her heel. "She is not asking for anything you were not going to give any way."

"What if you can't stop the fighting in time?" Akari asked.

Cologne sighed her shoulders sagging from the weight of her age. "Then we try to bring as many here as possible."

Nabiki walked into the cafe, stormed behind the counter and pushed Ukyo out of her way.

"What in the hell do you think you're doing?" the chef asked.

Nabiki said nothing. Instead she opened the cabinet door Ukyo had been standing in front of, and removed a sealed bottle of saki. The mercenary removed the cork, took a large clean glass from the counter, and poured a third of the liquid into the glass. "Why silly spatula girl no offer Shampoo that?" the Amazon asked as the moneylender set the untouched glass aside and chugged the bottle.

"That was supposed to be my secret stash," Ukyo said.

"Do you really think that any of you have kept any secrets from me?" Nabiki asked between gulps. "Now where are we going and when do we leave?"

"You aren't going anywhere," Cologne said, snatching the bottle away from her adopted daughter. "You are going to stay here and lay the groundwork so that the refugees have a place to go."

"Wait, two questions," Nabiki said with a slight slur. "First, what refugees? Second, how am I supposed to do anything without any money?"

"What about your savings?" Akane asked.

The mercenary picked up a salt shaker and poured a teaspoon into her palm. Taking a deep breath she blew on the pile and scattered the powder into the air.

"It's gone?" Cologne asked. "How could you loose that much money?"

"Daddy." Nabiki said, reaching for the Saki again.

"What did he do?" Akane asked.

"He spent it on a pre-payed tuition program," Nabiki said. "Cologne, you're going to have to rely on mercy and goodwill. That's Kasumi's department not mine. I'm going to."

Cologne lifted the saki to her lips end took a long draw. "Why can't things go my way, just once?" she asked, setting down the bottle. "Fine you can come, but only because we may need a mediator."

"I'm going too," Ryoga said. Ukyo watched as shadows of Darfur darkened his face. She did not want him to face this alone, but she had a restaurant to run.

"Good, we leave in the morning," the elder said.

"How we get there?" Shampoo asked.

"Leave that to me," Nabiki said with a feral smile.

* * *

Lotion looked down at the map on the table below and frowned. "War leader, are you sure it is wise to send all of our warriors to the northern pass?"

Comb bit her bottom lip, and pointed at the location of the capital at the Mush kingdom. "Yes, elder. Our scouts reported that after the Magistrate's forces finished routing the Phoenix tribe, they took a strait line rout to the Musk villages."

Perfume rolled her eyes and brushed aside the statement like an annoying fly. "The Phoenix were demolished by the Soatome boy, and the Musk are nothing more than half-animal trash. the Magistrate will not find us so easy to subjugate."

"Really?" Lotion asked her counterpart, "If the Musk are so weak, then why is it that our warriors have never defeated them on the field of battle?"

"An incompetent former war leader, but then your daughter-in-law's failings are no longer a rellevent issue for the council to discuss." Perfume said locking eyes with her rival.

"Ladies, please." Cream stood to his full height, the high priest of Morgan knowing full well the effect the vestments of the battle maiden had on a clan member who was not part of the clergy. "We have a despot Magistrate, hell bent on carving himself a personal kingdom, our two potential allies have been scattered. And while heaven may be far away the emperor is farther still. Must we contend with your petty disputes as well?"

Loufta sighed, "Then I take it that the messengers have yet to return with news from Beijing?"

Comb bowed her head, "No honored elder. They have not."

Lotion let out a sigh, hopefully her granddaughter would be safe."I suggest that this first group of messengers be sent with orders not to return."

Cream nodded his consent, it would be good it at least some survived. "The church concurs with this order."

"Then should we move the children to the caves?" Lotion asked. "The clergy would be better able to protect them there."

Perfume sighed, ''You are all over-reacting there is no reason to believe the situation is that bad."

"If anything we're under-reacting," Lotion muttered under her breath.

"Ladies, that is enough," Loufta said, her hands clenched in white fists under the table. "Comb, what are you're thoughts on this matter?"

"Honored elders, Cream may have a point," Comb began as Pink slipped into the room and lightly crept to Loufta's side. The girl leaned down and whispered something into the elder's ear causing Loufta's lips to upturn into an ever so slight smile. "Therefore, in my opinion, moving the children to the caverns will allow us greater tactical freedom in defending the village and allow us to provide for their maximum safety."

"Good, since we have agreement on the matter," Loufta began.

"I don't agree," Perfume slammed her hands down on the table. "This is ridiculous."

"Since we have a majority in agreement," Loufta corrected, as Pink departed. "Cream will gather the children and take them to the rice caves on the eastern pass. Morgan willing they will find a safe haven there."

Lotion nodded, "Then the meeting is adjourned?"

"No, one last thing has come up that we must deal with before we adjourn," Loufta said, picking up her gavel.

"Without the full council we cannot begin any new business," Cream interrupted.

"Of which I am well aware," Loufta smiled, "But I think the full council will make an exception in this case. Pink, Rink. Send him in."

Rink opened the door, and stepped to the side allowing Mousse to enter the council chambers. Comb let out a gasp as a dark look crossed her face. "What's the mater, War Leader?" Perfume asked, "Are you not happy to see your son?"

* * *

Ukyo stood on the roof of her restaurant lost in thought as she watched the city bustle under the night sky. Why did those two always have to be such damned hero's? Why did they always have to charge in blindly when someone needed their help, and why couldn't Ryoga just stay here with her this time... where it was safe? Behind her the rooftop access hatch creaked open, as the farm girl peaked out of the hatch.

"Go away," Ukyo said without looking at the girl. "Whatever it is you want to tell me, I'm not interested."

"I want you to go with him." Akari said.

"Akari, I don't care what you think, I'm not trying to steal... Wait, what was that again?"

"I want you to go with him," the cool air tickled the back of her throat forcing a cough.

"Please, why would I want to go anywhere with that idiot?"

"Don't even bother with the denial," Atari said as she sat down next to Ukyo, as she watched a satellite glide through Orion's belt, "I saw you kiss him at the sink the night I arrived here. Besides, you saw that look on his face too, piglet is going with Ranma, and I would just get in the way. He can't do this by himself."

"I can't, Konastu isn't able to run the restaurant on his own," Ukyo sighed. "The kid is so naive that he was giving away money last time I left him in charge. Uc-chan's will be out of business before I can get back."

"I'll stay until you two get back," Akari said. "I'll do the cooking and run the register. I just get the feeling that if someone doesn't go with piglet, he isn't going to come back. Please?"

"Look, I'll think about it," Ukyo said, "Ok?"

Akari nodded.

* * *

Comb rocked her son's broken torc in her hands and carried it to the council table, weeping as she softly hummed a lullaby. Perfume bit her lip and let the mother grieve the loss of the son who by law was dead to the village. Loufta nodded at the War Leader placed a trembling hand on her shoulder and turned to Mousse, the Outsider. "Are you sure of your decision, male?"

"Yes, elder," the boy replied, his eyes never leaving his mother's trembling form. "I just can't\dots"

Loufta held up her hand, quieting the murmuring voices of the council. "Your reasons are your own, child and no longer concern us. However, even as an outsider, we cannot allow one with your skills to leave the village's service just yet."

"I figured as much," Mousse said.

"I take it then that Cologne is not coming with the others?" Lotion asked.

"I am sorry elder, but I just don't know. I think Cologne knew of your plight when she asked me to return, but I cannot say so with any certainty. The old ghoul did not keep me in her council."

"Nor would I with a tone like that," Perfume said.

"War Leader?" Cream asked, placing a hand on Comb's shoulder, "Where would this child's talents be best put to use?"

Comb wiped the tears from her eyes her village needed her again. She would have to grieve later. "A platoon of younglings is leaving for the war camp tonight, with supplies and provisions. They world fair better if my s... the outsider were to accompany them."

"Will you do this for us, stranger?" Loufta asked.

"Do I Really have a choice?" the former Amazon replied.

* * *

Nabiki pushed past Satsuki and into the courtyard of the Kuno manor. "Tell Kuno-baby that I want to speak with him in the next thirty seconds, or else\dots"

"Or else what? You'll start charging by the minute?" the eldest of the principal's children asked from behind the mercenary girl where he was trimming a bonsai tree. The Middle Tendou girl jumped at the sound of Kuno's voice, as her heart bounced off of her ribs.

"Don't tempt me," the girl said, praying that she could keep the trembling at bay just a little longer. "Why are you gardening in the middle of the night?"

"Because my sister is not here," Kuno said.

The night echoed with the sound of shrill laughter as Kodachi's voice cried from the house, "That woman may be his bride but I will bear Ranma-sama's first child. Now, where is that essence of poppy seed."

Kuno sighed, "Now she has decided that she was asked to become Saotome's mistress. Give him my congratulations on the foundation of a happy household."

"Kuno-baby that wasn't the plan, remember?" The mercenary growled. "You're sister was supposed to understand that Ranma is off the market and off limits."

"My apologies, but there are some feats that are beyond even my abilities. Be glad I could do as much."

"You mean the great Blue Thunder is naught but a mere mortal?" Nabiki said with a giggle.

"Laugh all you want, nave, but my sister's acquiescence is more than I can give."

"Then kuno-baby, you're going to have to make this up to me some how," the mercenary girl said with a sensual grin.

"I'm sure you have something in mind..." Kuno said, "how much is it going to cost me this time?"

"Nothing spectacular, I just want to borrow your family's Cessna, for a little trip to China."

"Somehow I doubt that this is going to be a solo outing, the usual cast of knaves and scoundrels will be accompanying you I take it?" Kuno asked.

"Ah, you know how this works then." Nabiki smiled, "Yes my sister, her husband, lost boy, spatula girl, the bimbo and the crone will be going as well."

"And the blind one, he won't be coming this time?"

"He's the reason for the trip."

"Well, as much as I would like to help I'm afraid that what you ask is beyond me."

"I don't think you understand the gravity of you situation," Nabiki said, her foot tapping in cut-time. "If you don't I will make sure that a copy of the envelope finds it's way into the hands of the local authorities."

Kuno shrugged, "Of that I have no doubt Miss Tendou, but I am afraid that you are talking to the wrong Kuno. The plain belongs to my sister. She is the only one in the family with a pilot's license."

"Crap," Nabiki said, "Please tell me this is a sick joke."

A shrill laugh filled he air behind Nabiki sending shivers down the ice queen's spine. "I assure you, my brother is telling the truth, but worry sister dear, if my Ranma-sama does will it I would fly you to the moon."


End file.
